Why do Women....

Hey there, i am creating this because i have noticed there have been alot of threads about why women do or say certain things in different situations. So here is a thread you can post all of them rather than making new ones.

Im not trying to make a woman put down thread and actually hope i hear from alot of women.

So first off, after my experience with my wife last night, i guess this is kind of a two part question, is it wrong to blame my wifes bad attitude on PMS or lack of sleep? and why does she seem to get mad almost every night on our way home, no matter where we are coming from?

and to help put it in to context, We work out 3 or 4 times a week and each night on our way home it seems like the closer we get the crabbier she gets. I have tried to ask her what is wrong and i try to do what i think she wants but nothing really seems to help. It's not like she has to come home and do house work. I take care of all the laundry, dishes and cleaning of the house. Last night we both came from work to work out so we drove seperately. On our way home she sped home and by the time i got home she was already in the shower. Every day after i work out i go straight home and drink my protein shake then jump in the shower. This time she got mad at me that i didnt come home and jump in the shower immediately. I still finished with my shower 5 minutes after she did but it still pissed her off then when she asked what i wanted to eat i told her i wasnt hungry and that pissed her off even more because we wouldnt be eating together but she didnt eat anything either. I asked what was wrong and why she was so pissed and she said she just wanted us to hang out and talk which i was fine with, i didnt see how anything it did hindered our ability to hang out and talk. She ended up going to bed with saying little more than 20 words to me in 2 hours.

Can any woman try and help me gain insight to the problem here?

"

Hey there, i am creating this because i have noticed there have been alot of threads about why women do or say certain things in different situations. So here is a thread you can post all of them rather than making new ones.

 

Im not trying to make a woman put down thread and actually hoe i hear from alot of women.

 lol

So first off, after my experience with my wife last night, i guess this is kind of a two part question, is it wrong to blame my wifes bad attitude on PMS or lack of sleep? and why does she seem to get mad almost every night on our way home, no matter where we are coming from?

 

and to help put it in to context, We work out 3 or 4 times a week and each night on our way home it seems like the closer we get the crabbier she gets. I have tried to ask her what is wrong and i try to do what i think she wants but nothing really seems to help. It's not like she has to come home and do house work. I take care of all the laundry, dishes and cleaning of the house. Last night we both came from work to work out so we drove seperately. On our way home she sped home and by the time i got home she was already in the shower. Every day after i work out i go straight home and drink my protein shake then jump in the shower. This time she got mad at me that i didnt come home and jump in the shower immediately. I still finished with my shower 5 minutes after she did but it still pissed her off then when she asked what i wanted to eat i told her i wasnt hungry and that pissed her off even more because we wouldnt be eating together but she didnt eat anything either. I asked what was wrong and why she was so pissed and she said she just wanted us to hang out and talk which i was fine with, i didnt see how anything it did hindered our ability to hang out and talk. She ended up going to bed with saying little more than 20 words to me in 2 hours.

 

Can any woman try and help me gain insight to the problem here?

"

Its kind of hard to give any valuable insight as I dont really know either of you, but it seems as though there is likely something on her mind.  If she is irritable then that means her focus is elsewhere, if she is having a hard time dealing with changes in routine it come mean she is frustrated with attempts at communication.  Especially as she said she wanted to talk.  This isn't really a woman thing though, its a human thing.  We all have hesitation to say things which are on our minds.  Is there some sort of venue or actitivity you guys do that requires sitting for a long time?  For instance like going to a coffee shop and sitting for a few hours?  Sometimes people are not as eager to communicate if they don't think the receiver is prepared.  Going and talking and touching some less mundane subjects might be a way to go.  I know personally I sometimes keep things bottled up, and only feel comfortable sharing about two hours into a long talk. 

Just a thought, maybe it helps maybe not. 

Alright first might want to change this to hope.

"Im not trying to make a woman put down thread and actually hoe i hear from alot of women."

I am not a girl either. If I were in your situation exactly as you described it, I would probably just take her hand, lead her to the couch, kneel in front of her and tell her as reassuringly and confidently that you/I, ain;t a mind reader. Care a whole lot, and would do anything for, but just that whole telepathy, thing, ain't in my skill set. Apologize, and then say, that your/my ears work just fine though, and if she's willing to be patient so are you. Then just talk. Tell her that sometimes you/I can be slow to catch on what she means. 

"Also while it's good your looking to improve your marriage going to comicvine for help is an absurd idea."

Edit: I added the bolded, underlined text. I thought it would be obvious that I added it....but I'm editing this to let people know I added it.

" some 10 year kid."

" @hydrabob said:

" some 10 year kid."

Ms Tahoe my teacher says my advice is excellent, and she's been a lady for two years. 

IMO good advice is good advice and age don't matter, and if you can't tell good advice from life threatening and soul destroying advice, then time to see your sprit animal.  

"

You're really 10 years old?...and you have a teacher that used to be a man?

@battyfan1:
married for 10 months

she doesnt want kids yet (i do)

@RazzaTazz:
Thanks you were the one i was realy looking towards getting an answer from and no we dont really have a time that we sit down and just talk. We are always on the move and when we are at home she usually wants to have the tv, a movie, or music on

@hydrabob:
I didnt acutally blame it on her PMS i was just giving an example of what people tend to blame it on. I just thought it might be because she was tired (getting up at 4 in the morning and going to bed at 9 or 10 at night)

Also Im not necessarilly going to the internet for advise, i just like getting information from all types of mediums although i understand what you mean. Im not even mad about it im just trying to find an understanding

" @hydrabob said:

"Also while it's good your looking to improve your marriage going to comicvine for help is an absurd idea.""

is it wrong to blame my wifes bad attitude on PMS or lack of sleep? 

and why does she seem to get mad almost every night on our way home, no matter where we are coming from?

@.Mistress Redhead.:
lol your relationship sounds alot like ours. I know the best thing for me to do is to rub her back when she is in that kind of mood. I never try to just ignore her when she is like that. Her's isn't from PMS but you can tell when it is that time. She does notice most ofthe time when she is just in that mood and normally apologizes first thing the next morning. I am very hard to anger so she vents everything on me which can be taxing at times and she knows it. I think we communicate well but there are just the little things.

I would like her to just tell me whats wrong but she normally says nothings wrong and has a bad attitude until we are about to fall asleep then she sits up in bed and wants to argue or talk about what is wrong then. Very weird lol but its just her way.

@cyberninja:
WOW!!!

you were really useless

"

@cyberninja:
WOW!!!

 

you were really useless

"

" @.Mistress Redhead.: My wife actually doesn't really get irritable when she gets PMS, in fact the only time she really gets really angry is after a conversation with her mother or one of her brothers, though oddly she gets along better with my mother than I do "

" @.Mistress Redhead.: My daughter usually runs defense for me, cause every time my wife gets pissed off she goes into super cute mode and diverts my wife's attention, I'm sure this will only work until she gets out of diapers though "

"

Hey there, i am creating this because i have noticed there have been alot of threads about why women do or say certain things in different situations. So here is a thread you can post all of them rather than making new ones.

 

Im not trying to make a woman put down thread and actually hope i hear from alot of women.

 

So first off, after my experience with my wife last night, i guess this is kind of a two part question, is it wrong to blame my wifes bad attitude on PMS or lack of sleep? and why does she seem to get mad almost every night on our way home, no matter where we are coming from?

 

and to help put it in to context, We work out 3 or 4 times a week and each night on our way home it seems like the closer we get the crabbier she gets. I have tried to ask her what is wrong and i try to do what i think she wants but nothing really seems to help. It's not like she has to come home and do house work. I take care of all the laundry, dishes and cleaning of the house. Last night we both came from work to work out so we drove seperately. On our way home she sped home and by the time i got home she was already in the shower. Every day after i work out i go straight home and drink my protein shake then jump in the shower. This time she got mad at me that i didnt come home and jump in the shower immediately. I still finished with my shower 5 minutes after she did but it still pissed her off then when she asked what i wanted to eat i told her i wasnt hungry and that pissed her off even more because we wouldnt be eating together but she didnt eat anything either. I asked what was wrong and why she was so pissed and she said she just wanted us to hang out and talk which i was fine with, i didnt see how anything it did hindered our ability to hang out and talk. She ended up going to bed with saying little more than 20 words to me in 2 hours.

 

Can any woman try and help me gain insight to the problem here?

"

Women for the most part are very indirect beings, communication-wise.......

This confuses men, because they for the most part are very direct........

There's a communication problem.....

The problem is under the surface, and she wants you to figure it out.........

Women like to test men.... Whilst the men don't know their being tested...... often about things they shouldn't even need to be tested for, but eh........

There's a problem somewhere, so analyze every detail (even things that don't make sense) of the relationship that led up to this point, and start from there..........

Think about anything in the relationship that she would want to be passive agressive about....

Or anything she thinks you don't understand aboput her.........

Women like empathy, they just want to know you understand their feelings..........

Try to open up to her and see how she responds........

Lay put how you feel and how you see the situation, and ask her if this perspective is different thatn how she sees it, then try to work towards a golden mean, a compromise if necessary.....

Bottom line is communication, understanding, and always approaching the issues in a positive way......

Not getting angry, just trying to understand.................

" @joshmightbe said:

" @.Mistress Redhead.: My daughter usually runs defense for me, cause every time my wife gets pissed off she goes into super cute mode and diverts my wife's attention, I'm sure this will only work until she gets out of diapers though "

We are trying for a baby, I think Arrow has the idea that once the kid is here he can deflect onto her... OHHH he is in for a shock ;)

@cpt_linger said:

" @.Mistress Redhead.: I would love to meet your family xD "

ohhh realllly nooooo My dad is awesome (he is a film director and a lover of all things geek, which is where I get it from) but the rest of em are psycho's ;)

"

Yea, i would liike to have a kid now but we are waiting till she is out of school. Is your husbands real name arrow or is that a nick name or just what you call him when your talking about him to strangers?

Yea i actually get along with my in-laws really well.

@velle37:
Thanks. She has already dropped the whole problem today (i think). lol the funny thing about what you posted is that we see 99% of everything differently.

Probably not the best place to ask for marriage advice...

To me it sounds like it has something to do with her. She is upset about something and is not sharing with you. You said she gets out of shape, when you are on your way home from the gym. Now I think about reasons why she would be upset. She wants a new place? She wants her own place? She wants to go somewhere else? Something is not right? Something is missing, or was never there?

We all need morew info if we have any chance of helping you in any way shape or form... The only thing I can suggest is get her to open up to you. She is your wife, you should know how to talk to each other... (Things to know how to do, before marrage). I am only saying, I am sure she has opened up to you in the past. So this makes me think, it has to be something kinda big if she is keeping it from you, it means she is scared and doesn't want to hurt you.  OR  She is just in a funk, and needs a little bit of space and time to get over it.  I really need more info...

Questions you should ask yourself, and answers that will help bring light to the problem.

1. Do you both have free time?

2.  Do you have friends that you talk too?

3. How long has it been, since you had a little get a way? (Does wonders)

4. What is your main focus in life? (Yours & Hers)

Thats all I can think of right now, of the top of my head. However I went to school for this kind of thing, so if you want some cheap advice I'm here.

I donno why women do what they do but I'm glad they got what they got!!!

Heres what you do.

Stick your chest out, pull your pants up, and raise your voice.

Say these exact words.

"I'm the man of this house woman, straighten up!"

Yell it.

She'll see how manly you are and that you mean business.

What I usually do is say "Honey, I don't know what I did, but I'm sorry." Then she tends to start laughing and forget why she was mad at me (or at least puts it on the back burner)

"

1. Do you both have free time?

 

2.  Do you have friends that you talk too?

 

3. How long has it been, since you had a little get a way? (Does wonders)

 

4. What is your main focus in life? (Yours & Hers)

 

Thats all I can think of right now, of the top of my head. However I went to school for this kind of thing, so if you want some cheap advice I'm here.

"

Yea, i would think she is just in a funk but it tends to happen. She recently got a new job that she likes to mention she hates but se thinks it is worth the money. I tell her i dont want her doing it if she doesnt like it and that money isn't as important as being happy.

1. Neither of us get a whole lot of free time and we never get free time from each other besides at work and school. I have asked her if she would like more free time (i personally wouldnt mind more free time) and she always says she doesnt want time away from me but she thinks i should go hang out with my friends more when she is in school

2.I have friends that live close that i talk too. She has girl friends from school but they live a couple hours away so they almost never hang out. I tell her that her friends can come to our house and stay over or she can go over there (with or with out me there)

3.The last get away we had together was out to California about a month ago. We go to her grand parents house out in the middle of no where every couple months. I would like to go some where but she would like to go out of the country and we cant afford that. She also only wants to go to beaches which we have been to 3 or 4 times.

4.Mine is just creating a happy family and eventually taking over the family company. She doesnt realy know what she wants besides having a family and travelling

@texasdeathmatch said:

"Probably not the best place to ask for marriage advice... "

"Probably not the best place to ask for marriage advice... "

"@texasdeathmatch said:

"Probably not the best place to ask for marriage advice... "

Lol, all of us being nerdy virgins and all............ "

"Boobies. "

@soundbite said:

"@velle37 said:

"@texasdeathmatch said:

"Probably not the best place to ask for marriage advice... "

Lol, all of us being nerdy virgins and all............ "

speak for yourself velle "

Lmao, that was sarcasm.......

@joshmightbe said:

"What I usually do is say "Honey, I don't know what I did, but I'm sorry." Then she tends to start laughing and forget why she was mad at me (or at least puts it on the back burner) "

That's a good one......

@Metro_Man said:

"@velle37: I am a huge nerd, but I am no virgin. I love Doctor Who, Comics, and Boobies. "

Om-noms are so awesome.......

My last girlfriend had bigger on-noms than any of my previous girlfrends.........

A wise man once said: "I don't know ask a girl!" Why? because we women are always right! :)