Savage Dragon #250

***POSSIBLE SPOILERS*** (you were warned)

It's that time again! Another milestone issue for Savage Dragon! This title has been plugging along for 250 issues now... 256, if you count the original three-issue mini-series, #0, #1/2, and the #13 from the Image X-Month (although Larsen would prefer you forgot that last one). If you start counting the minis, crossovers, and significant guest appearances, there have been at least another 50 (FIFTY!!!) issues with Savage Dragon in them! That's OVER 300 issues of Dragon-y goodness! But ah, okay, we'll just say 250. Well done, Mr. Larsen.

So, like I said, this is a milestone issue, right? I mean: NUMBER 250! This has to be epic! ...Right? Well, er, not so much... but it's not really Larsen's fault, and it's actually kind of funny. You see, besides the fact that this title is in triple digits, written and drawn by one guy, setting an industry record for that which will likely never be broken, the last twenty-eight (TWENTY-EIGHT!) years (YEARS!) of stories have been in real time (REAL TIME!). So characters have aged, died, retired, had sex, had kids, and just everything one does in life, and other than throwing in the superheroic elements, this real time story uses real life as a general guide for what's going on in the background of the story. And right now? LOL! Cornavirus lockdown, dude! LMAO! So that's what we've got for issue #250- Savage Dragon and crew on Stay At Hame lockdown! It's so fuggin' funny, it just makes you want to cry!

So what's this issue's story about? Keeping the kids busy, and out of trouble. Facetiming (or whatever it's called in Dragon's universe) with family. Having phone calls with family. Wondering if they're going to have kindergarten in the fall. Having phone calls with the creative team of Dragon's in-story Savage Dragon comic of their life- the creative team freaking out that they can't just have an issue about nothing! Nice meta moment, Larsen!

Oh, and lots of sex for Malcolm and Maxine while their maid-bot watches the kids. No, seriously- more nudity this issue, but at least it's in context. I mean admit it- if you're on lockdown with your significant other- if for no other reason than just to pass the time, you're having sex. So gratuitous nudity gets a pass this time, because honestly, it's not gratuitous- it's life right now.

But don't worry, Vicious Circle goons literally bust in to the Dragon home, and try to kill everybody! The Dragon kids and the maid-bot come running, and the fight is over pretty quickly, but hey, Larsen found a way to add in some action! Can't be mad at that.

Speaking of gratuitous, there's a video chat with Malcolm, Peter, Mark, and the Janey twins. You might recall that in #226, it was randomly mentioned that they are of age now. Well, the twins are wearing nothing but webs in this chat which they are also shooting from their butts (just like their mom, Widow does). They're making sexual innuendos the entire chat. I'm not sure how I feel about this. I mean, it's weird to say this about fictitious characters, but I remember when they were kids. I don't want to read Maxine saying, "You're watching girls squirting goo out of their hoo-has. That's porn." I mean, is there anything else to those characters? It's just... icky-feeling, y'know? It's just a story on paper, but... it's weird. I'm invested in the characters, and... I don't know... I don't need to know every aspect of their lives, I guess? I'm sure plenty of readers had no problem with it, but <sigh> I do. Not a huge problem- it just makes me a little uncomfortable. <shrugs> Too bad for me. Larsen's doing his thing- good for him.

Before I move on from the sex stuff, I have to address one other thing. Only because I mentioned it in the review for #227. I was talking about the gratuitous nudity, and the fact that it was just boobs and vaginas, but not penises- trying to make the point that if you can do without one, you can do without the other. Well, I really doubt Larsen read my review, but he sort of evens it out this issue. As he's ripping Openface's head in half, Malcolm's lower body is in shadow. The shadow and scene is arranged at such an angle that you could be seeing Openface's foot between Malcolm's legs, or you could be seeing his third leg. You decide, I guess. I'm going with "Openface's foot."

And then there's a surprise ending that I just can't... won't... give away. Buy the issue!

But wait! That's only the main story! There's more! Like #225, there's a three-part Catchin' Up With Flash Mercury story strewn throughout the book. It was just kind of ho-hum- not as good as I remember the last one being. There are also stories of: The Deadly Duo (with Superpatriot), Powerhouse & Flash Mercury (who fight goons of a villain only mentioned- Dr. Sivana), Yankee Rebel (with Superpatriot), The Deadly Duo (with Daredevil), Carl Cosmic, Tales of Godtown, The Deadly Duo (with Rainbow Raider), and a retouched Graphic Fantasy #2 Savage Dragon story (with the GF #2 cover on the issue's back cover).

There's a great running gag throughout the Deadly Duo stories. I'd tell you, but it would ruin the stories. The Yankee Rebel story was cool, but definitely a political soap box of a story. It's not wrong, but political commentary nonetheless. Tales of Godtown was cool- we get to see Heracles and Thor again. The best piece though was the Graphic Fantasy story. Simon Kane, aka The Possessor, was definitely the precursor to Larsen's Fiend. I mean he had to be. Dragon even calls him a fiend in the story. As a writer, it was just really cool to see this earlier version, compared to what came later in the Fiend.

Art was top notch this round. No complaints.

For the score, I'm really not surprised to be giving this the full five stars. Yeah, there was nudity, but it was in context. Yeah, there was a political commentary story, but y'know, I found myself agreeing with this one. I liked the whole issue. So yeah, five stars.

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