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Washington, 1972.

After a phone call with Presiden Nixon regarding the nation's moral decay and a return to dignity, decency and high standards, cross-dressing FBI Director Edgar J. Hoover enjoys dinner and a slow dance with his associate director, Clyde.

But the vibe is abruptly shattered when Dracula's Witnesses descend on his mansion, and Edgar finds himself violently dispatched to Resurrection, where his talents serve him well as Obergrosse Pirate Mitra ...

Who happens to be leading a Pirate attack against Necropolis, armed with holy water bullets, rockets filled with the heads of priests and saints, and an angelic missile - with an authentic seraphim inside. But is it enough to vanquish the Nosferatu?

Meanwhile Requiem is still dealing with a hairy problem at La Reine de Joie Tavern. But General Salem's orgasm-stealing fetish is about to explode all barriers to love ...

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