By waezi2 14 Comments
You wanna know whats NOT scary?
Seriously, look at this guy. Just LOOK at him!
That is most likely the most not-scary thing I have ever seen!
There is NOTHING frightening about clowns! And even if they could somehow be seen as eerie, then you STILL have no reason to worry that the clowns are gong to eat you. If a clown actually wanted to start a murder spree, then he would most likely trip over his ow feet and make people chuckle instead of fleeing in fear. Being a clown means that failing spectacularly is in your job description. Humiliating themselves is their destiny.
And THAT’S why some people are scared of them.
Confused? Allow me to explain:
A very long time ago, there was a clown named Buster.
As you can see, Buster was not a very happy clown. Ever since he had been a little kid, he had a dream. A dream about becoming an actuary.
But the five year old Buster had his hearth busted when his papa explained to him that it was his destiny to be a clown and make an ass out of himself in front of spectators. Just like his father, and his father’s father, and his father’s father’s father. So Buster gave up his dream, and became a clown, failing at forgetting his dream about hunting for tax exemptions. And he didn’t like all the people who laughed at him while he was doing his job.
Buster swore that he would have his revenge.
Buster managed to find fellow clowns who didn’t like people being amused at their constant failures(most of these clowns missed the point of their job). So they planned to invade and take over Greek, the land where clowns originally came from.
Needless to say, they failed. Those silly chumps sailed the WRONG way and ended up in Australia!
... No, wait, that was the American Navy...
But the clowns did sail right into a banana boat, and had to swim away in shame as all the Greek people stood at the beach, laughing and pointing fingers at those silly clowns.
Buster realized that no matter what the clowns did, they would never get any respect.
But Buster had a cunning plan.
Disguised as Lawrence D. Cohen, he helped making a TV series called It, the tale of a clown who did nothing but killing and scaring the shit out of children. Eventually, scary clowns became a resurrecting theme in horror movies, which of course was all part of Buster's plan. Slowly, people began to see clowns in a new light, as something to be feared. Meaning that when Buster and his fellow clowns would start a new invasion, everyone would be all: "RUN AWAY! CLOWNS!!!!" despite the fact that clowns are about as scary as hairballs.
Anyway, that's why people are scared of clowns.
I'm Waezi2, and thanks for wasting time with me.