My Fall and Rise

When i first came on here it was to debate why so and so wins.I had no intentions of becoming what I became.I want to apologize for every moronic stance or drama that i started or helped add fire to.I may joke around now but it has no malice like before. 2018 was one of the most shitty years of my life. And it doesn't excuse my actions as i take full responsibility over them. A lot of stuff had happen in my personal life. One of these instances was like a gut punch and not only that but i was bitter because everyone else was doing great but me. And i took out my frustration on all of you which isn't right. Eventually my fall became depression and then i got a job but it didn't erase my depression. After leaving that job hoping for another job that i really wanted i applied over 5 times and nothing had happen. That made me more depressed. Then when it looked like there was light in the tunnel my grandmas passing snuffed it out.Prior i tried to hang myself but failed. Then after her i tried two more times. After confessing my depression to my family my mom wanted me to walk with her. Now i do not like walking in nature but i did and with each walk i slowly became a new creature. I wasn't much of a christian at that point but i became born again. There was a close call where i briefly became a atheist because i felt like he wasn't answering my prayers. But i got pass it and became stronger. God,Mom,and listening to emotion videos which some videos made me cry while others made me feel. I am now a different more forgiving,more wiser,and more open person. I harbor no hate towards anyone and i forgive everyone. I would even forgive my worst enemy. I know the reason why i failed was that god wanted better for me. If you do not believe I am not going to force you to. I completely understand and i wont treat you like scum because of it.As of now i finally have a laptop so now i can post better quality cavs and to not do them on my phone. And if I am wrong with proof i will accept that I am wrong. I refuse to be too aggressive when i debate and I have improved in that regard as well. I have two potential job options and life is looking great.

Kamehameha to depression and negativity