I'll attempt to answer your questions...
1) Short answer is no.
Violent criminals may or may not be "scum", but it's always wrong to generalize people. Generalizing is a natural habit of our brain, but it's something we need to keep in check with a healthy dose of skepticism... otherwise we end up thinking like bigots. The reality of violent criminals always depends on the individual and their motivations, as well as the situation they were in... but you'd have to know all of this pretty well to make an accurate estimation of their character.
So, the best we can do is to rationally consider how much they're likely to be dangerous/bad people, and act accordingly. That guy you said spent 5 years in prison for attempted murder, for example... he could be someone with anger issues, or just a really protective boyfried, or a psychopath, etc. It's up to us to decipher everything we can about his personality, from things like body language to the tone of his voice, and then speculate... of course there's always a chance we could be wrong, but at least we are basing our assumptions on observable evidence, and not preconceptions.
2) Short answer is yes, you should use your morals and philosophy to guide your decisions.
However there's no point in following our beliefs if we're being blind to ourselves, or the World.
If your philosphy says "A", but you feel like doing "B", then either your philosophy needs some adjusting to be done, or you're really not who you think you are or should be... In which case, after acknowledging the issue, you must do 1 of 2 things:
- Change your philosophy to fit yourself
- Change yourself to fit your philosophy
The second option is obviously the hardest to implement, but it will be the most "rewarding" as you will feel you're a better person, by your own standards, and it will also boost your selfesteem. The first option is actually not "wrong" either... infact, it's the most commonly adopted; sometimes we hold on to absurd ideals and standards that are just not feasible for us... chosing this, will often leads to a personal growth in maturity, and will also feel "liberating", as we get rid of some of the expectations we put on ourselves.
There is no right or wrong decision, but failing to make one will just continue to cause us stress.
3) I think this is something that you have to resolve on your own.
There would be no point in telling you what to do or believe, since the issue was generated by your parents doing exactly this.
Also, i'm an atheist... so i'm afraid i can't be of much help to you on this matter.
My advice would be to fight ignorance with knowledge, so study and learn as much as you have to about your religon, as well as others, until you're ready to decide for yourself what to believe in.
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