Joygirl's Play-by-Play "Son of Batman" Commentary

Contains spoilers.

Poor Deathstroke, jobbing to Ra's like that.

When did Damian Wayne become Yoda?

I think Batman has a cleavage fetish. Both of his "great loves" have huge tits and unzipped catsuits. Not that I'm complaining.

Sweet, Killer Croc being badass.

Who's the hot punk teen and when is she coming to canon? Apparently she's 13 so... um, this is awkward.

Yup, I get it, Damian's the bestest at lots of stuff.

Why is Man-Bat a monkey?

Hookers! Dibs on the one with pink hair.

When did Sagat and Bronze Tiger f*** and have Ubu?

Alfred's the best part of this so far.

Yes, we get it, Robin's classic costume is super gay. We get it. Everyone gets it.

Batman: "GETTIN' REAL SICK OF YOUR S*** DAMIAN."

Oh hey Nightwing. Kewl.

Damian you stupid f***.

Oh okay, hot punk is Langstrom's daughter. That'll make family dinners weird.

MAN-BAT ARMY? Nuhhh.

"No swords. Use these bladed darts instead, way more humane."

Since when is wood Slippery When Wet?

My patience for Damian's slasher grin is wearing thin.

Starring Nightwing as "Sir-Not-Appearing-In-This-Film"

"You're sure?" "I'm sure. Two mountains side by side couldn't possibly be anything else."

Talia in bondage *fapfapfapfapfap*

Fridge Logic: Why didn't they actually make helping Ra's into the Pits a priority? He almost made it himself, with even a tiny amount of help he would have made it.

Batman is officially an elf. He gets a free Search check when passing by a secret door. That just happened and I cannot be convinced that he isn't an elf.

When does Rebecca Langstrom get naked? That needs to happen. INTERNET MAKE IT HAPPEN. Pure thoughts.

Why is Batman so skinny? Making up for how buff everyone was in Flashpoint Paradox?

Also Bruce's jaw is too narrow. Where's the Bat-jaw?

Starring Curt Connors as Dr. Langstrom

Since when does Batman attend to Bat-Business in Bruce Wayne getup? Isn't he way too paranoid for that?

Why does Damian covet the uniform so much if he thinks it's gay as f***?

When did the Robin outfit get a hood? Did Damian sew it himself?

Why isn't Ubu recovering? He just got his ass beat, 12-year-olds endure worse beatings on a daily basis and don't go comatose from them.

Judging from his suddenly cool-ass boots, Damian DID sew the new costume himself. Unless Bruce has a "Bat-Individual-Robin-Costume-Creating Machine"

"It's a kid, get him!" -- Whaaaa?

I dive into endless chutes all the time. Who cares where they go? I'll probably be fine. /sarcasm

"Don't you dare dip my mother into that life-giving magical pit! I'll kill you first!"

Heh, Slade's really letting Damian have it.

Slade's a trained killer. There's no way he'd shoot a pistol one-handed when his other hand is free, it's less accurate.

Nananananannanananana bat-ninjas

Nobody knows better than to fight Batman with bats?

Slade doesn't fight with two swords. That's Rose's thing.

When is Talia gonna get naked?

Isn't the Lazarus Pit supposed to make you crazy? Like it did to Jason and like it does to Ra's every time?

Speaking of Jason, where's Tim?

"Talia would have been mine"? This is what this is about? Slade wants to tap that ass?

Yesssss stab Damian *fapfapfap*

YOU CAN'T BLOCK BULLETS WITH SWORDS. STOP IT.

And the award for Jobber of the Year goes to... Slade Wilson! Let's give him a hand everybody! *clapclapclap*

"You call it luck! I call it BEING A MARY SUE!"

Fridge Logic: Since when does Deathstroke try to set up crime operations? He's a mercenary, he kills stuff. He's not a spiteful, vindictive little bastard who sets up rackets like this.

"Oh no, I got magical life-juice all over me! I'm ruined!" *dies*

"Go ahead, finish me." Since when is Slade suicidal? Does he actually not want to live to fight another day? Or is this ONLY so Damian can have a Heel Face Turn?

That Lazarus-mill thingy is built really hilariously badly.

Starring Nightwing as deus-ex-machina man!

"Damian should stay with me." "But he'll want to stay with me." "Lol nope, he's through with you. Too bad bitch." #BatYOLO"

Since when does Batman refer to Robins by their real name in public? Who killed Batman and took his place?

Ah, it's over. Well, that was mediocre.

Hope you enjoyed, everyone. <3

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