Round 1: Win a chess tournament with the other contestants.
While many of the other contestants might beat him in intelligence, The Joker has the mind of chaos perfectly fitted for the unpredictability required to win a game like chess. Everyone else: Doom, Luther, Stark— they'll play the game intelligently but they shall fail to foresee any unpredictable moments when Joker switches from one strategy to another in the blink of an eye. If you don't know the moves you cannot counter them. Joker's moves won't make sense until you realize you've been checkmated.
"What a mind he has. How many men have ever bested me at chess? He has such a splendid brain. Switching from one strategy to another in the blink of an eye. As though he has harnessed chaos for his own use."
—Ra's Al Ghul
1st Place: The Joker.+3 Points
2nd Place: Mr. Terrific. Michael Holt can play chess blindfolded versus two different opponents at the same time [?]. +2 Points
3rd Place: Tony Stark.He plays chess all the time... and even once bested Reed Richards [?]. +1 Points
Round 2: Take a personal item from both Thanos and Darkseid.
When no one was looking, Lex Luthor once stole forty cakes. His thievery skills are unmatched, so he wins no contest.
1st Place: Lex Luthor. He took forty cakes. +3 Points
2nd Place:The Joker. He secretly filled the cakes with cyanide explosives and killed everyone.+2 Points
3rd Place: Nobody. They all died. +0 Points
Round 3: A debate on the benefits and dangers of humans with powers.
Come on now— He's the greatest businessman in the DC Universe. He's a criminal mastermind, and he was even the freakin' President of the United States! He has the charisma of a natural leader and the mindset and brutal focus of a malicious politician, but most importantly he understands the values of power and has studied its benefits/danger all his life throughout his experiences versus Superman. Lex can debate circles around all those other contestants.
"Gods are selfish beings who fly around in little red capes and don't share their powers with mankind. No Kitty, I don't want to be a God, I just want to bring fire to the people."—Lex Luthor
1st Place: Lex Luthor.+3 Points
2nd Place: Doctor Doom. He's also a seasoned politician. +2 Points
3rd Place: Bruce Wayne. He's Bruce Wayne. +1 Point
Round 4: A game of Texas Hold 'em
His very own name comes from the name of a card: "The Joker." Playing cards is something he does best.
...Cheating is something he does better.
1st Place: The Joker.+3 Points
2nd Place: Tony Stark. The rich man likes to gamble. +2 Points
3rd Place: The Joker. He cheats and puts himself in third place too. +1 Point.
Round 5: Prove how your opponents cheated in Rounds 1 - 4.
Bruce has been dealing with the Joker's tricks and tactics all his life... because he's Batman. Oh— and he also happens to be the World's Greatest Detective.
1st Place: Bruce Wayne.+3 Points
2nd Place: Reed Richards.+2 Points
3rd Place: Lex Luthor.+1 Point
4th Place: Tony Stark. He hacks the system and adds a fourth place slot. +5 Points
So who wins, who is the biggest cheat?
Well let's take a look at the final score, shall we?
- Tony Stark: 8 Points
- Dr. Doom: 2 Points
- The Joker: 9 Points
- Lex Luthor: 7 Points
- Mr. Terrific: 2 Points
- Bruce Wayne: 4 Points
- Reed Richards: 1 Point
- Ahmadeus Cho: 0 Points
Aaaaand the Winner(s) is...............
First Place: (9 Points)
Second Place: (8 Points)
Third Place: (7 Points)