Irishlad

Deadpool Chapter 5 is up: http://www.comicvine.com/forums/fan-fic-8/marvel-mayhem-deadpool-5-1533873/#9 Tales of Asgard Chapter 5...

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Irishlad

661

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2005

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Irishlad

661

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2005

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Reviews: 4

User Lists: 2

@impurestcheese: It's fine I understand but obviously its not gonna be a characterisation of the actual person its just purely the name and its a bit of fun but as I said I understand.

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Irishlad

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@batkevin74: You're right I guess I didn't think about that sorry.

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Irishlad

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#4  Edited By Irishlad

Hello and Welcome to Character Creation Contest #47 (This one is a bit goofy but screw it lets have some fun)

For any newbies how you play the game is by creating a character based on the guidelines below (simple!)

No Caption Provided

-Create a character based on the username of anyone on the site (including yourself if you'd like)

-It can be a regular everyday character, superhero, supervillain who cares? go crazy.

-MAKE SURE YOU GET PERMISSION FROM THE USER BEFOREHAND!

-Word Limit 3000

-Deadline 4th April

GOOD LUCK!

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Irishlad

661

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2005

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Irishlad

661

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2005

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Reviews: 4

User Lists: 2

This contest brought out the best in people in my opinion, great entries all arounf and good choice @cbishop.

My vote goes to @batkevin74: that has to be my most favourite entry in CCC history I loved it.

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Irishlad

661

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2005

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Avatar image for irishlad
Irishlad

661

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2005

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49

Followers

Reviews: 4

User Lists: 2

#8  Edited By Irishlad

@impurestcheese This is very good as usual and it's good to see Mayhem still going :).

What Was Good:

-You've a great hold of the characters, so much so that you almost wish they were featured more in the comics.

-It's new reader friendly, yes you can get the whole history of the group that led up till now but it's not NEEDED necessarily which is good.

-Character Development (too many of us fan-fic writers get our minds set on one particular incarnation of a character but I can see these characters growing which is a credit to you)

-I'm very intrigued as to where this will lead and I know it will have a great build up.

What Could Possibly Be Improved:

-It doesn't hit the ground running. While not every story needs to start off that way I think a quick small thrill at the beginning could be good to hook in the reader and make them want to keep reading like for example you could have teased something to come in the future or had 8-Ball and Diamondback have a quick fun fight sequence at the beginning just to introduce what they can do and give a glimpse into their personalities to the new readers and to remind the older readers what makes them awesome. Now in any other chapter this wouldn't be a critique but it's purely because it's a number 1 and I hope I didn't sound too harsh if I did sorry.

-Spelling & Grammar, something we all mistakes in but nevertheless.

Overall:

8/10 This was great.

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Irishlad

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#9  Edited By Irishlad

SURPRISE!

Decided to dabble in a bit of story for fun, chances are it won't be as good since it's been a long time and it's a bit dark.

Anyway enjoy!

I Kissed Killed Cupid

EXCERPTS FROM MAX'S SUPER MEGA AWESOME JOURNAL 3000!

Day 1:

Experiment 001

Hello! my name is Max I am 7 and a half years old.

Today will be the day I try to lure the dreaded Cupid into my basement of doom.

I have laid out multiple traps including and not limited to THE BASKET OF DOOM, THE LEGO OF DOOM AND FINALLY THE SOCKS OF DOOM.

Soon I will be rid of him and his love spreading and then me, Mom and Dad can play again!

Day 2:

Experiment 002

This is Max, experiment 001 was a failure it only resulted in dad tripping over the legos of doom and hurting his legs and Mommy kissed it better yes verrrry icky.

But enough about that since Mom and Dad are gone to a pencil meeting TODAY IS THE DAY. If Cupid is a love spreader then perhaps if i try to kiss a girl then he will appear.

The object of experiment is a girl named Betty.

Day 3:

Experiment 003

This is Max, experiment 002 was a failure yet again i tried kissing her but she screamed and kicked me in my manhood.

Upon examination of Mom and Dad snuggling I've now come to the conclusion that Cupid is hiding from me and the only place he could be hiding in is my DREAMS.

Operation Sleep: INITIATE

Day 4:

Experiment 004

A puppy? I DREAMT OF A PUPPY! I DON'T WANT A PUPPY I WANT MY MOM AND DAD TO PLAY WITH ME INSTEAD OF LOVING EACH OTHER ALL DAY NOT SOME MONGREL!

Wait.

That's it...I knew the journal would pay off.

Dad told me in life every boy and girl has three wishes I've spent my first two on stupid things like chocolate and Sonic 3 but this idea....IT JUST MIGHT WORK!

Day 5:

EXPERIMENT 004 WAS A SUCCESS MOM AND DAD ARE PLAYING WITH ME I DID IT I FINALLY DID IT I KILLED CUPID!

Day 6:

WE GOT ICE CREAM AND PANCAKES TODAY WOOHOO!

Day 7:

Dad left his job so WE'RE GOING TO DISNEYLAND!

Day 12:

Mom and Dad are playing but they're kinda quiet today.

Day 13:

Dad said he had something to do so we didn't get to play as much today

Day 14:

Mom and Dad watched me play Sonic today and when Dad went to kiss Mom she didn't notice and he missed her face haha.

Day 17:

No playing today, oh well !

Day 20:

No playing

Day 23:.

No playing

Day 27:

NO PLAYING!

Day 36:

Mom and Dad aren't snuggling as much.

Day 48:

Dad went out again today, I asked why but Mom just smiled and watched the television.

Day 60:

Mom and Dad are acting weird they're just staring off into space like they're not in the room anymore.

Day 63:

Mom and Dad are shouting a lot and sometimes they whisper shout.

Day 72:

I've made a mistake. I should never have killed Cupid. Dad's leaving for good this time and Mom doesn't care.

Day 80:

Mom cried again today and there's nothing I can do.

Day 91:

Dad isn't coming back.

I wish he'd come back, Mom used to love seeing him smile.

I wish Mom would stop crying too.

I wish that it wasn't my fault but it is.

I wish that Mom and Dad loved each other again but they don't.

I have no more wishes because I used my last wish to do something someone should never do and its one thing I wish for the most...

I wish I never killed Cupid.

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Irishlad

661

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@judasnixon: Love and Rockets is an interesting one I've never heard of it before.