Is it okay to be homophobic

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rawsos

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Poll Is it okay to be homophobic (108 votes)

Yes 38%
No 62%

Can you not like gay people without being homophobic?

Are you a bad person if you are not comfortable being near or doing things with a member of the lgbtq community? Are people being forced to accept the community?

Should they be forced?

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marinad

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I don't see anything wrong with that

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deactivated-64969837cbeff

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No it’s not okay.

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King_Isshiki

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Yes.

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frozen

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#56 frozen  Moderator
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Antebellum

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This

said:

You hang out with the people you want, you avoid the people you don't want to see, but you leave in peace those who are different from you or who think differently.

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The_Justiciar

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This

said:

You hang out with the people you want, you avoid the people you don't want to see, but you leave in peace those who are different from you or who think differently.

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WizardKing

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No. You can think they are weird (I do) but you cannot treat them as if they are not a living being.

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Steve40L

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It's fine to feel uncomfortable around the abnormal. But to have a prejudice against, or say homosexuals don't belong is not ok.

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SirKaboom15

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#62  Edited By SirKaboom15

As a Christian, I do not approve of them. However, that does not mean dislike them. Im not going to bully someone for their beliefs.

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dernman

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I hate the term homophobic. It's a overused bias blanket term that doesn't accurately describe the people and their motivations.

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tonny00

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as long as you aren't harassing physically or verbally you should be fine.

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hansonJohn

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It’s okay to be anything as long as you do no harm.

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SpareHeadOne

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It’s better than being homophobicphobic those guys are real assholes

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Lunacyde

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#67 Lunacyde  Moderator

On one hand, you can think whatever you want, don't let it become action.

On the other hand, most people cannot do that. If they think poorly of a certain type of people they generally will treat them poorly as well.

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FloLikeYou

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#68  Edited By FloLikeYou

@dernman: It’s sad that the term even has to exist in the first place … homophobic people aren’t scared of gay people but just hate them, for whatever reason really

They shouldn’t be allowed to hide their hostility behind a term that basically says “I don’t have control over my fear! It’s just who I am” because that’s obviously not the case.. I don’t know a single homophob who’s not very proud of harassing and insulting gay people. It’s not a fear, it's simply hatred.

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FloLikeYou

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@penguinbegins: It’s sad that the term even has to exist in the first place … homophobic people aren’t scared of gay people but just hate them, for whatever reason really

They shouldn’t be allowed to hide their hostility behind a term that basically says “I don’t have control over my fear! It’s just who I am” because that’s obviously not the case.. I don’t know a single homophob who’s not very proud of harassing and insulting gay people. It’s not a fear, it's simply hatred.

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rawsos

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This

said:

You hang out with the people you want, you avoid the people you don't want to see, but you leave in peace those who are different from you or who think differently.

they call you homophobic if you dont want to hang with them tho

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rawsos

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rawsos

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As a Christian, I do not approve of them. However, that does not mean dislike them. Im not going to bully someone for their beliefs.

what if you dont want to hang out with them because of it? is it wrong?

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rawsos

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@dernman: It’s sad that the term even has to exist in the first place … homophobic people aren’t scared of gay people but just hate them, for whatever reason really

They shouldn’t be allowed to hide their hostility behind a term that basically says “I don’t have control over my fear! It’s just who I am” because that’s obviously not the case.. I don’t know a single homophob who’s not very proud of harassing and insulting gay people. It’s not a fear, it's simply hatred.

what if im just not comfortable? Do I still have to hang out with them?

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SirKaboom15

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@rawsos: Honestly, that's something I'm not 100 percent sure on.

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noobsnowman

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@lunacyde said:

On one hand, you can think whatever you want, don't let it become action.

On the other hand, most people cannot do that. If they think poorly of a certain type of people they generally will treat them poorly as well.

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deactivated-6144f10376051

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Steve40L

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@rawsos You don't have to hang out with anyone. You don't need to be friends with anyone, just don't bully them.

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Ccbm2208

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?

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rawsos

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@steve40l said:

@rawsos You don't have to hang out with anyone. You don't need to be friends with anyone, just don't bully them.

they will call you homophobic then

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FloLikeYou

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@rawsos: You‘re obviously not homophobic if you’re not comfortable. You can‘t control that.

You’re homophobic as soon as you insult or harass someone based solely on their sexuality. Do no harm and you’ll receive no harm.

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GojoSaluja

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No

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Antebellum

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@rawsos:

@rawsos said:
@steve40l said:

@rawsos You don't have to hang out with anyone. You don't need to be friends with anyone, just don't bully them.

they will call you homophobic then

That's a lie, stop lying rawsos.

If this happened to you, you're either lying or made something wrong or made them something wrong.

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Lunacyde

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#83 Lunacyde  Moderator

Treat others as you would want to be treated.

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rawsos

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@rawsos:

@rawsos said:
@steve40l said:

@rawsos You don't have to hang out with anyone. You don't need to be friends with anyone, just don't bully them.

they will call you homophobic then

That's a lie, stop lying rawsos.

If this happened to you, you're either lying or made something wrong or made them something wrong.

im not lying

saying that you are uncomfortable hanging with lgbtq people will get u called homophobic

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Steve40L

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@rawsos Either they're over exaggerating, or you're doing something that makes them feel you don't like them.

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PenguinBegins

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@penguinbegins: It’s sad that the term even has to exist in the first place … homophobic people aren’t scared of gay people but just hate them, for whatever reason really

They shouldn’t be allowed to hide their hostility behind a term that basically says “I don’t have control over my fear! It’s just who I am” because that’s obviously not the case.. I don’t know a single homophob who’s not very proud of harassing and insulting gay people. It’s not a fear, it's simply hatred.

It's not hatred. homosexuality is a behavior, certain behaviors are commonly deemed wrong, homosexuality is one of these behaviors. "hate" doesn't come in to it.

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SC

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#88 SC  Moderator

You should try your best to not be homophobic. For a few reasons, including your own wellbeing.

Firstly, what if you are gay? Being gay isn't a choice, and being homophobic does rule out the possibility of being gay. You basically create a situation which invites internal hatred towards yourself, and you could end up bitter, resentful, guilt ridden, depressed. Lots of internal struggles and conflict. Its a tough sad situation for people to be in. Then again since CV is international, I suppose it depends on the particular laws in your country.

Assuming you aren't in a place where your life would be in danger though, secondly... what if a close friend or family member is gay? Would you prefer they feel like they have to stay in the closet scared you would think less of them if they shared their truth with you? Would you think less of them? Being homophobic can also be a negative for your future interactions and your potential to interact and befriend a larger group of people, not just gay people directly, but people who are supportive of gay people as well. What if you find a person of the gender you are attracted to and find out they are bi or pan? Which is different to being gay, but if you are homophobic, well, it'd still probably have a negative effect on them.

Also no matter how much someone could say something like "but I am definitely not gay, I will never have gay friends or family, I would never like a bi/pan/gay person anyway" it wouldn't be the first time people have said that but then gone on to be very very wrong.

As for whether or not you are a bad person? Ah well thats complicated, none of us will know you well enough to tell, maybe you are like me, and your family was homophobic, and it can be tough to shake off ideas when they come from family, even if they are wrong/misunderstood. Feelings of discomfort are common in a lot of different contexts too. Not necessarily the same as hatred or not necessarily a bad thing. I feel discomfort in large groups of people, that doesn't mean I dislike all the people in that large group. So I guess its the specific reason you feel uncomfortable. Is it if a gay person hits on you? Thats a sympathetic situation, but not really discomfort with gay people, since people of any orientation can feel such discomfort when someone they aren't attracted to does that, even if the person is the gender of the orientation they like.

I don't really think you should get stuck on whether that makes you a bad person, just try and think if maybe you can be kinder and nicer to people in general and include gay people with that.

Are people being forced... uh depends what you mean. Societies tend to flourish when they ensure the protection, safety and give equity, opportunity and give Rights to its people, but especially minorities who might otherwise be at risk. Generally and broadly speaking, the countries that doing right by their LGBQT folk, are doing really well in other areas, everyone else is to be clear, not just LGBQT people. Socio economic mobility, happiness measurements, freedom of press, personal freedoms, a lot of areas and fields that are valued by people. Countries where homosexuality is illegal, don't do so well. Of course this isn't because some countries "force homosexuality" and others don't, its a naturally occurring effect alongside other changes and goals, that some like to claim is forceful. Chances are, there are ways you benefit which are the result of some structure that exists to benefit you, like a safety net of sorts. Is that forced? Is extending it to gay people forced?

Anyway, even if you do feel a bit uncomfortable around gay people, its good you are asking questions. You are open to the idea that you could change, and maybe with time and new experiences your perspective will change. Good luck OP!

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deactivated-6156f1d2abe5e

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It is ok to be gay, but not reason to abuse them

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Thekillerklok

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It's wrong to be any-phobic

I am Lion-phobic. And I defy you tell me why that's wrong.

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SC

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#92 SC  Moderator

@thekillerklok: Could interfere with your ability to keep yourself safe from Lions. See, if you have a normal apprehension and concern with Lions, if you are at the Zoo and hear that a lion escaped its cage, you'd probably seek safety, and follow safety instructions and procedures. Exit the Zoo, get indoors or in a car. You have a rational and reasonable sense about Lions and the risks they can possess.

If you have Ailurophobia, or Leophobia or are Lion-phobic, you may freeze or shut down, unable to focus and concentrate, as you are overcome with fear, anxiety, emotion etc and be easy prey.

Thats an extreme example, as you may not go to Zoo's very often. Could also prevent you from seeing Lion King though. Though that may be a blessing! One described method to help with Ailurophobia, is exposure therapy. So you could try and playing with Lion cubs. Though the kinds of people who have lion cubs... ehhhh.

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TheInsufferable

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#93  Edited By TheInsufferable

@sc: Let's start with a joke

No Caption Provided

Back to the topic, ailurophobia usually refers to fear of cats specifically, and not felidae, but etymology aside, the point here is that there's a distinction between phobia in medical usage and in politics where it often refers to discriminatory behavior. In fact, claiming that something like say, being afraid of heights, is "wrong" in the same sense as hating a group of people or harming them is ... kinda discriminatory.

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Mo_Ali

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Is it okay to be arachnophobic or claustrophobic?

I don’t think it’s okay to be this stupid

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#95 SC  Moderator

@theinsufferable: I am aware. I was not being serious. Its why I gave descending examples and Lion King jokes.

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TheInsufferable

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@sc: Lion King is serious business though, leophobic or not, few pictures invoke as much hatred as this guy

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#97 SC  Moderator

@theinsufferable: Pfft Scar isn't hated. He is universally adored! He's like the Ursula of the Land! Cherished and appreciated by all, for being a plucky underdog... cat that tells it like it is!

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TheInsufferable

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@sc: Not gonna lie, it's always a pleasure to read a message from bizarro world. I've heard the last couple of years have been among the century's best there.

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Ccbm2208

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Gay people are just regular people though , why would you be uncomfortable around them ?