Drifter will be a grizzled, more competent version of himself, right up until the point where he takes everything a step too far because on the inside all he wants is to loved. Then he gets perma-IP banned. He has a mild resurgence a year later when he moves but eventually realizes that that "none of this sh*t really matters anymore".
Gambler goes complete insane and goes on a massive mod rampage across the site, until the combined powers of every other mod and staff put him down in a Omega-theat style chain of events that is rumoured to have been staged in some sort of experiment to see how people react.
It is revealed that Aztek was really P-Man all along.....all 900 accounts.
The Storm fans try to rally and take control, but have to deal with a rebellion of DBZ fans.....they eventually cancel out. Everyone is happy. Then the Hulk and Juggernaut fanboys do the exact same thing.
Vance goes on a Targets-esque kamikaze rampage when Daredevil is completely cancelled. He is eventually put down attempted to escape by diving off a church. Things don't go so well.
Static is on hand to deliver the on-the-spot eulogy. "Motherf**ker thought he could fly". He then hurls his police badge as hard as he can, and it gets stuck in a wall while the revamped Shaft themesong plays.
Gerald becomes a super-genius when he accidentally merges his mind with the CV database. The first thing he does with this massive jump in IQ? Build a machine that lets people stab other people in the face through the internet.
Buckshot then immediately returns and has a lot of fun doing so.
A three-way internet website war wages between the Whiskey-Media sites (nobody cares about the politics one at this point, since politics have imploded in the five years). Eventually, they merge together in one final battle and rule the world, Red LAMP's plot finally coming to fruition after nine hard years of work.
But then IE returns after being sacrificed and makes everybody his bitch.
Darkchild is dead. He had a brain aneurism fighting some racist bastards. A massive funeral was held for him. After Arrow and Lantern Prime arrived and Arrow shot him, the funeral turned into a massive brawl and even uttering the name "Darkchild" is illegal, under penalty of death. Of note, after Arrow killed Prime he was seen quoting Boondock Saints over Darkchild's grave.
Everyone realizes that Castlekings initials are CK, and thus a massive, extremely wide usage of C**K as his nickname begins. It eventually gets so bad that he makes a cult and commits suicide with poison Kool-Aid. Unfortunately, he forget to make sure that everyone else drank it first, so he's the only one who dies.
Morpheus becomes a real superhero and thus is the only one of us who really gets loved in the end. Unfortunately, he mainly specializes in using his powers to only help those with blown out tires.....so when the world comes to nuclear armageddon a few weeks later, we all die.
Son of Storm has a son that joins the site. The username? Daughter of Son of Storm. The idea to use "Granddaughter of Storm" is lost on the child. In addition, everyone questions the gender of the user, like everyone secretly does for SoS. Of course, everyone saw this coming, despite the fact that it makes no sense.
Zoom becomes a pagan-like figure, as the only person to retain any knowledge of speedsters after The Fall. To receive knowledge from him, one must admit to being an idiot five times, in five different posts. One complimentary scan if you're a senior member. Ten "I'm an idiot"s if you have any reference to DBZ in your name.
G-Man is defeated when Captain Cascader turns on him, in a sinister plot with Red LAMP. However, his daughter grows up into G-Woman the 2nd, and with the help of a more experienced Babs, defeats both of the evil bastards in a epic final battle. Under her leadership, the site flourishes into a haven for Disney Comics and G-Man comics fans. People are indifferent about this.
Hawk has literally risen to the position of an angel. Unfortunately, he's not of those nice angels, but moreso the kind that pins your ass to the wall with a bigass flaming sword. As a result he isn't very popular and says sayonara to this universe and goes to explore another one. He is never seen again.
Lunacyde, as a result of the nuclear fallout, has gained immense superpowers. However, he's also completely homicidal. He also turns into a werewolf, because right before he got his superhuman durability he was bit by one. Hence "Lunacyde". When he's not burying dead bodies, he's generally making new ones.
Methos will return as the final Immortal. He'll be pretty cool for about a week until he accidentally kills us all, and then he revives us and then kills himself to make sure it never happens again. Unfortunately, only one person knows this (me) and nobody believes him.
Come one, come all to see what horrific, or maybe kind of decent fate lies in your future (as POST THAT YOU WANT TO SEE YOURS. Or I'll just do it for you). Attempting to actually piece together all of this history would be suicidal. Instead, try to see the truth-that there is no history. Only Matrix references.
Comicvine 1,000,000 (AKA "Your future, as told by me")
This sounds about right.
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