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Avatar image for tifalockhart
#1 Posted by TifaLockhart (18772 posts) - - Show Bio

Q: Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

A: For drizzle.

Avatar image for the_stegman
#2 Edited by The Stegman (36955 posts) - - Show Bio

Giraffe walks into a bar...and says "ouch"

Avatar image for russellmania77
#3 Edited by russellmania77 (17603 posts) - - Show Bio

how do you wake up lady gaga? poke her face

im so bad

Avatar image for awesam
#4 Posted by AweSam (7527 posts) - - Show Bio

What did the rude prism say to the light beam that smacked into him?

Get bent!

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#5 Posted by Pyrogram (45618 posts) - - Show Bio

@awesam said:

What did the rude prism say to the light beam that smacked into him?

Get bent!

I loled

Avatar image for joewell911
#6 Posted by Joewell911 (14086 posts) - - Show Bio

You guys wanna hear a dirty joke?

The white horse fell into the mud

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#7 Edited by Skyfire (953 posts) - - Show Bio

A horse walks into a bar.

Several people see the potential danger of the situation and promptly leave.

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#8 Posted by tparks (9533 posts) - - Show Bio

Q: Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

A: For drizzle.

haha. I'm using that one all day tomorrow at work.

Q: What did the fish say when he swam into a wall.

A: Dam(n)

Q: What did Sushi A say to Sushi B

A: Wasabi? (wuz up B?)

Avatar image for mrdecepticonleader
#9 Posted by mrdecepticonleader (19685 posts) - - Show Bio

What are penises for?

Fore skin!

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#10 Posted by Pokeysteve (11257 posts) - - Show Bio

how do you wake up lady gaga? poke her face

im so bad

This is my favorite. So far.

Online
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#11 Posted by TifaLockhart (18772 posts) - - Show Bio

Q: What do you call a fish with no eyes?

A: A fsh.

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#12 Posted by BumpyBoo (13392 posts) - - Show Bio
No Caption Provided

Moderator
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#13 Posted by Samimista (22297 posts) - - Show Bio

@joewell said:

You guys wanna hear a dirty joke?

The white horse fell into the mud

Lmao! xD

Avatar image for thewolverine04
#15 Posted by TheWolverine04 (195 posts) - - Show Bio
Avatar image for awesam
#18 Posted by AweSam (7527 posts) - - Show Bio

Two guys walk into a bar... Second guy should have seen it coming.

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#19 Posted by ms__omega (5065 posts) - - Show Bio

Q: Norman Bates has a butler, What does the butler call Norman?

A: Master Bates (hehe get it).

Avatar image for thewolverine04
#20 Edited by TheWolverine04 (195 posts) - - Show Bio
No Caption Provided

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#21 Edited by BiteMe-Fanboy (8918 posts) - - Show Bio

Girl you're just like a wrench

Because you tighten my nuts.

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#22 Posted by God_Spawn (40901 posts) - - Show Bio

Batgirl left the family for a real gang. What gang did she join?

The Crips.

Moderator Online
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#23 Posted by Dragonborn_CT (26215 posts) - - Show Bio

I lol'd at this thread...

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#24 Posted by cameron83 (8540 posts) - - Show Bio
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#25 Posted by patzello (492 posts) - - Show Bio

A scotsman walks into a bar with a steering wheel attached to his groin.

The bartender asks what it is for.

He replies " I don't know, but it's driving me nuts" (use a scottish accent on the punchline)

Avatar image for warlock360
#26 Posted by warlock360 (28181 posts) - - Show Bio

What do you call a Boomerang that won't come back?

A stick.

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#27 Posted by Batman242 (6618 posts) - - Show Bio

Batgirl left the family for a real gang. What gang did she join?

The Crips.

That....... doesn't belong here xDDDD LOL

What's the internet's favorite animal?

Lynx

Avatar image for perethorn
#28 Posted by Perethorn (5930 posts) - - Show Bio

What is green and smells like paint?

Green Paint

Avatar image for ostyo
#29 Edited by Ostyo (14098 posts) - - Show Bio

What you guys all deserve is two thumbs ups for these gems.

Avatar image for russellmania77
#30 Edited by russellmania77 (17603 posts) - - Show Bio

i made this lame one up in 6 grade so its trade mark of russellmania77

1; knock knock?

2; who's there?

3;yaw

4; yaw who?

5. dot com

Avatar image for laflux
#31 Posted by laflux (23747 posts) - - Show Bio

Giraffe walks into a bar...and says "ouch"

You stole my joke. DAMM YOU!!!!!

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#32 Edited by laflux (23747 posts) - - Show Bio

@pyrogram said:

@awesam said:

What did the rude prism say to the light beam that smacked into him?

Get bent!

I loled

As did I.

Avatar image for fadetoblackbolt
#33 Posted by FadeToBlackBolt (23390 posts) - - Show Bio

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?

Where's my tractor?

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#34 Edited by theTimeStreamer (2845 posts) - - Show Bio

there were 2 horses in a field. one was black, the other farther away.

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#35 Edited by JohnnyGat (1592 posts) - - Show Bio

My love life

Avatar image for immortalone
#36 Posted by ImmortalOne (4064 posts) - - Show Bio

What do you call an Indian kneecap?

Patel-a.

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#37 Edited by King Saturn (220953 posts) - - Show Bio

@bumpyboo said:
No Caption Provided

This is the best post I have seen in Months.

Avatar image for edamame
#38 Posted by Edamame (30654 posts) - - Show Bio

1. Teacher: "What do the words 'ignorance' and 'apathy' mean?"

Student: "I don't know, and I don't care."

Avatar image for anywhichwaybutup
#39 Posted by AnyWhichWayButUp (850 posts) - - Show Bio

How does Spiderman know how many people are in New York City?

He uses his Spider census.

Avatar image for perethorn
#40 Posted by Perethorn (5930 posts) - - Show Bio

How does Superman ends after been in water for a long time?

Rusty, because he is The Man of Steel.

Avatar image for russellmania77
#41 Posted by russellmania77 (17603 posts) - - Show Bio

a man walks into a bar and gets a drunk

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#42 Posted by RulerOfThisUniverse (6518 posts) - - Show Bio

DAAAAAMN YOOOOU, THREEEEEAD!!!!!!!

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#43 Posted by HumanRocket (11218 posts) - - Show Bio

This happen to me a few days ago. I was walking in the street a guy comes up to me and asks me whats the greatest nation on earth? and u can't say the USA...i look at him serious thinking about my answer i take a guess and say Spain and he says... NOPE the greatest nation is DONATION and he takes out his cup full of money. That homeless man made me laugh wished i had money on me that day to give it to him.

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#44 Posted by Gripper (1084 posts) - - Show Bio

That's what she said!

Avatar image for perethorn
#45 Posted by Perethorn (5930 posts) - - Show Bio

180 degrees port!

Port died calcined

How many Z fighters you need to change a bulb?

none, that´s work for Yamcha

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#46 Posted by GodTriggerHulk (2084 posts) - - Show Bio
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#47 Edited by ARMIV2 (10048 posts) - - Show Bio

I was going to make some kool-aid one day, but I saw that someone had already made it. I guess they beat me to the punch.

It took me a week to come up with that, and it was for class...

Avatar image for fadetoblackbolt
#48 Posted by FadeToBlackBolt (23390 posts) - - Show Bio

@godtriggerhulk: (Thumbs up)

Tis a classic. My friend came up with it in year 7. Had a little drawing sequence with it.

Greatest thing ever.

Avatar image for optimuspalm
#49 Posted by OptimusPalm (1871 posts) - - Show Bio

**THIS JOKE IS NOT RACIST**

Why did so many black people die in the trenches in the first world war?

Because every time the sergeant said 'GET DOWN', they all jumped up and started dancing.

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#50 Posted by Ostyo (14098 posts) - - Show Bio