Deep stuff here.
A 26 year old virgin's view on sex.
@pperspectiveandreality: you have a very old way of thinking very backwords in time. However in your stance i can respect that and i can see how it would hurt you but sex is not that big of a deal. You are 26 years old most people lose their virginity in highschool. Hop on christian mingle.
I think its great that you make up your own mind on the subject, no stance is really right or wrong - what matters is what makes you happy as long as you dont have unrealistic expectations of everyone else. As such I think suggestions or tips on the subject would really be irrelevant. But one thing I am fairly certain about is that in this case Nancy was in the wrong and not you, her feelings of need for physical contact are entirely understandable but it never excuses lying or betrayal, especially to this degree. You did the right thing in ditching her, and I think you know that.. Try to look forward and put her behind you.
@tazzmission said:
@gambit474 said:
@orician_seis said:
@Tazz
yes that is true. However. I don't care who you are, male or female, both have needs. One can only hold them off for so long. It enhances a relationship, gives you something to share. If it becomes the core of the relationship you did something wrong. But its not so sacred that you need to save yourself for just one person. To me its not respectable, you hit 30 and still a virgin it becomes laughable. Woman don't expect men to save themselves. After 30+ years of age they don't want a virgin. I just think you'd be setting yourself up to get burned. That's all.
This supports what I just said..The only reason it's "laughable" is because the ignorant pressure others into thinking such. Also if you're a guy then you probably shouldn't be stating what women want because women will even say that they vary amongst each other. "They don't want a virgin"..If they judge a guy that much based on that then she's not worth getting with in the first place
so you all of a sudden know what all women are thinking? did you just happen to question every single one of them?
thats just as dangerous as women always assuming a man only wants want thing from them. i also want to touch on that some ( not all) women dont know what they want in a guy anymore. some want the jock others want the bad boy or thug or they want to simply lead a guy on and pull the whole your like a brother to me card. my attitude is judge me for me and dont expect me to change into something im not wich is the jock. bad boy or thug. what they see is what they get and if they dont like it hey forget them and they can go spend some time with a guy like a chris brown who beats women.
Don't be ridiculous..I have multiple female friends and some of them have stated before that they would rather have the nice guy who's a virgin over the douchebag that brags about how many girls he's banged. I didn't say I know what all women are thinking..I implied that it VARIES amongst them. Smh
@orician_seis What a load of crap. "So what?".."What society thinks"..What society thinks doesn't mean squat bud. If society thought it was good to shoot up heroin every day would you still do it? Judging by your comment you probably would. Your comments make you sound like nothing more than a sheep who follows the heard instead of thinking for yourself and having your own free will. Society doesn't make the rules and if you think otherwise then you're the only one who's fooling yourself. Sorry but you've got a terrible argument if that's your reasoning for why the guy shouldn't save himself
@the_stegman said:
Well, first, lemme say, I'm sorry to hear that this Nancy was so dishonest and adulterous, especially for so very long. In a relationship, communication is key, like you said, if she was unhappy or unfufilled, she should have come out and said so, even end the relationship, not go out and cheat with others. I would have broken up with her too if I were in your shoes, there's some things I can put up with in a relationship, infidelity isn't one of them.
As for waiting for marriage to have sex, I don't wanna really get in to it, I'll just say, I don't really believe in marriage to begin with, so waiting until then to have sex is equally illogical to me. Now to me, marriage is just a construct and if you love someone, you won't need a piece of paper and a church to express that, however, I understand for many, it's more than that, it's a showcase of ultimate devotion and intimacy, an act saying that you're willling to spend the rest of your life with a person, and give yourself to them wholly, and for that reason, and I completely understand.
Annnywho, I'm sorry for your troubles mate, hopefully, you can find another fish in this tumultuous sea we call "love". One who shares your values and is willing to wait and be ready for something more.
PS, thanks for not posting this on Valentine's Day, then I'd feel really bad.
I totally agree with everything on this post. Sorry dude, thats something that no one should go through.
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