Wolverine: I Fought A Werewolf In A Bar One Time

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Guardiandevil83

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#1  Edited By Guardiandevil83

Even Superheroes Have Down Time.....

Stark Tower: December 5th, Friday, 8am

No Caption Provided

Wolverine: Stuff it Cage. Anyway, let me tell the damn story 'fore I forget. Yeah, like I was saying, I fought a damn Werewolf in a bar one time.

Jessica Drew: Um, what?

Wolverine: You hard of hearing 'girly?

Jessica Drew: No. It's just that you said you fought a Werewolf...

Wolverine: Yep.

Jessica Drew: ...In a bar?

Wolverine: Sure did.

Jessica Drew: Um...okay??

Wolverine: Yeah. I know it ain't the usual thing that happens, but let me get back into the story and see if it all makes sense.

Wolverine: I had taken my bike on up to Toronto to visit an old friend. This was back sometimes in the 90's, I think it was. But I wound up walking threw the wilds of deepest Canada, 'cuz I had to, ahem, attend to other matters that called 'fer my attention.

Steve Rogers: You mean you murdered someone.

*Air in the room grows tense.*

Wolverine: Actually, Cap, I had to run with my Wolves. Reconnect with nature, run bucked nude through the trees. That sorta thing. But thanks for the deduction Sherlock.

*Steve Rogers sheepishly sits his ass down*

Clint Barton: Boooom! Logan hit Steve with the inconsiderate burn.

Steve Rogers: You do know I run your training sessions right?

*Clint Barton sheepishly shuts the f--k up.*

Carol Danvers: Will everybody shut up so that he can get to the damn fighting?!?!

Luke Cage: Hell yeah. And somebody get her a coffee! It's too early for all the bull---t. What he look like Logan?

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Wolverine: Thanks 'darlin. Anyway to answer your question, Luke, he ain't look no different then anyone else. 'Cept everyone else ain't got my nose.

Wolverine: And what my nose kept telling me, was, "This ain't no 'regular fella!"I had just walked four miles into some small town in the middle of nowhere Canada. Can't much remember the name.

Tony Stark: Jesus, Logan four miles through Canadian winter?

Wolverine: Yep. Now shut your pie hole Richie Rich, I'm trying to entertain before shifts start.

Wolverine: Anywho. It was 'onna those colder nights in September. When the 'flippin Grim Reaper comes in the shape of a hail of ice and snow. Whole 'lotta nothing up them ways, 'cept cold and death. 'cept, Wolves and Bears ready to feast on your gizzards. And the only damn thing I wanted in the world at that time was a brew. So I stopped inside of the first saloon that was open, walked my cold ass inside and took me a seat, ordered the first few rounds, and drank until the 'ol healing factor lost it's edge.

Wolverine: Everything was going too pleasant. And it's been in my experience, that bliss is just a made up word. There is always calm before the damn storm. The music didn't grate the ears, and there wasn't no idiots eyeballing me, and a few of the waitresses on call were mighty fine. Few of 'em even showed interest. So I had potential for when I felt the urge.

Wolverine: Suddenly the atmosphere just changed the moment the stranger walked in. Not for everyone else, but for me. Because of my 'ol sniffer. He introduced himself to a waitress whom met him at the door. Caught his name, said it was Jack. Anyway, Jack had just then become my competition. He was young enough, handsome enough, yet troubled enough to give all them small town girls all kinds of giggles. Not that I mined. Hell, I 'woulda probably been too drunk to do much anyway, if I had my way. Jack set down at the bar next to me, and my senses went wild! Never 'smelt nothing like him before. Everything in my being was saying "Fight! Kill! Attack!"

Wolverine: But I ignored it 'cuz I knew it was the animal. And the animal could be wrong sometimes. I was still dealing with what Weapon X had did to me. So, my anger had to be carefully bottled. And Sometimes people irritated me for no no damn reason. Somehow though I just knew, that this was something different. HE was something different.

Wolverine:We didn't speak much directly. Mostly had small talk with everyone else within the same vicinity. He was a pleasant enough 'fella. But still, I had this overwhelming urge to fight him. Well, the sucker could drink, that was for sure, and so could I. And that's just what we did. But, I guess, the more he drank, the more control he let slip of what he was trying to hold back. The animal that was inside.

Wolverine: I could relate.

No Caption Provided

Carol Danvers: He changed right there in the bar? In front of everyone? Surely, he had to be aware of his condition?

Wolverine: Oh I think he was 'darlin. In fact I think that's why he went inside that bar in the first place.

Carol Danvers: Meaning..??

Wolverine: Meaning, he ain't intend for anybody to leave that bar alive. That's why he was 'dranking so tough. Man had to make the slaughter go down easier.

*room grows even tenser.*

Wolverine: Jackie boy starts having a seizure, and all kinds of hell broke lose. People screaming for the ambulance to be called, and the 'Lil waitresses were all making a fuss. And, 'til this damn day I can't explain how.....I could hear the wolves out in the mountains. My pack and others. The damn place was loud as all hell, and the doors and windows were sealed tighter then virgin cooter, but damnit! I swear I could hear 'em all. Jackie gets louder...starts sounding stranger. Suddenly 'onna the waitresses makes a bloodcurdling scream, and I finally focus on what's happening. 'Ol Jackie had done gone and turned all furry........

No Caption Provided

Wolverine: And big as I'll be damned. His eyes bloodshot and itching for a kill. We immediately lock eyes. Hell, I'm the only one man enough to. Everybody else starts scampering like rabbits.

I pop my claws and get ready for the showdown of the century. Jackie just seems to see a snack. He walks towards me with his claws and fangs barred. His ears and mouth; pulled back. A false smile, that would make Satan shiver. He roars like a damn mad grizzly and I charge in after....then...then..

*Wolverine slams coffee mug on table*

Wolverine: .....Why so serious?

*Avengers is union* Looooogaaan!!

Wolverine: Ain't I a stinker.

*Thor leaps up from his chair*

Thor: Ahaha! I like this tale friend Logan! Another!

Theeeee End.

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Bystander

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Logan is such an ass here)

Nod bad though

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#3  Edited By Guardiandevil83

@cyberwarrior: Thanks for the view, and yeah Logan can be an ass.

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The Impersonator

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Nice one, bub.

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#5  Edited By Guardiandevil83

@the_impersonator: Thanks. I checked out your Library. I like what your doing with Wolverine and the Blade was dope too. I love first-person stories.

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Guardiandevil83

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@the_impersonator: Thanks. I checked out your Library. I like what your doing with Wolverine and the Blade was dope too. I love first-person stories.

You're welcome and Thanks!

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@guardiandevil83: I know you're a dude. So is Luke Cage. Think what am I trying to point out right now)

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Guardiandevil83

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Oh lol sorry

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ImpurestCheese

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@guardiandevil83: Hmm not sold on the script form but since you normally write good prose I'm willing to look past it. Great to see Jack Russell back on the prowl.

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Guardiandevil83

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Sorry I'm bumping this. I truly had fun with this one. Love Wolverine. Love Carol, and Luke and Thor, and just about everyone with speaking parts. And of course Mr. Werewolf By Night Himself, Jack Russell.

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cbishop

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TylerDurden7272

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Sorry I'm bumping this. I truly had fun with this one. Love Wolverine. Love Carol, and Luke and Thor, and just about everyone with speaking parts. And of course Mr. Werewolf By Night Himself, Jack Russell.

Lol this is soooooo much better than his on going. Good job bub

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Very nice dialogue. It was a fun read, but I have a question. What exactly happened at the end? Logan says "Why so serious". Does that mean he just pranked everyone?

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Guardiandevil83

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@spitfirepanda: No. He fought Jack and in my mind it was brutal. But Logan is a dick at times, so I decided to show this by having him leave everyone at the edge of their seats. Oh and the slam on the table was the JUMP scare, considering its, a werewolf story I thought it appropriate. Lol

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The Impersonator

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Bump.

Reason-Not only I loved this story, I love Wolverine. :)

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#25  Edited By The Impersonator