Wha? #2 Redux part one, wha' ever happened to Wha? Or, how I learned to live without Gah! and brought sexy back

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wildvine

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#1  Edited By wildvine  Moderator

Seven-freaking years ago.... *

Wv: Well, I feel like that went very well. Maybe a little stilted, but one day I will learn to not post first drafts. Even as I am writing a first draft in the current future but somehow seven years ago or something equally meta. Is anyone laughing yet? Oh wait! I have an email from my good friend and occasional night dream visitor Capfanboy.

Cap: Gah! is Wha?s father from 15 years ago. However, Wha?s mother did not think Gah! mature enough to bring up a child and so cared for the child in secret until her tragic death aged 34. Wha? grew up to be a lot more mature than her father, thus the lack of booty jokes in her content, only revealing herself to Gah! in this very first chapter, her unveiling upon the world. Gah! is sad. He wants his daughter to acknowledge him. Will she?

Wv: Man. I really could have edited that to make it seem less like a post quote and more like, you know, dialogue. Whatever. I'll just shoot off a totally real, totally in the moment response right now.

Wv: Wha? Does not accept her long absent father.

Wv: Heh. I bet that would have got a laugh seven years ago. So elohel. Hang on, he replied already. Man he has some fast fingers! (A comment I know he would have appreciated if he was here. Spoilers?)

Cap: Then Gah! declares War.

Wv: Hey. That's a randon one off comment to inspire a goofy idea nearly a decade later. Or something.

Wv: Think of the forum! Think of the other writers! Can anyone survive this war?

Wv: Yes, yes. The future-present random lol way-past-its-experation-date idea is coming together. This is the storyline that will revitalize the fourum.

Cap: Gah! can. And he will slaughter his daughter, with his mad rhyme skills.

Wv: Seriously, how did this never become its own story arc? Oh well. Better nearly a decade later than never, as the saying goes. If only I had written Robin Hood a few years earlier... Wait, what? That was ALSO seven years agao? Geez. I really need to keep my promise to Batkev at some point. But for now, let the games begin.

Seven years later...

Huh. Did I really just blow seven years and I'm STILL not a published author? Hm. Well at least I can print off the docs of my half-baked ideas and fashion myself a papery quilt to keep myself warm as I slowly slide into the icy void of death. Or I guess I could reboot an old franchicise. This is never been attempted before, and if it was it surely proved to be a smash hit.

So, let's see. I'll do some kind of Gah! I mean Wha? interview... Review... thing. Then Cap will blast me in the comments. Of course he remembers the randomLoL comments of yester year and will be on board for this. The only thing I need now is a new co-host. Batmeme and Bane's weird accent are so last incriment of time space. Yes I could lazily post this half copy/pasted mess, but then someone may rightly call me on being a hack writer, and I simply cannot deal with actuality.

I suppose there is a second challenge at play here. What precisely to review/whatever. I don't have any particular character I desire to comedically roast, and I haven't read any recent comics.... Oh wait, I did read something lately! Okay. I got this. And since I'm talking about a Japanese product its only appros that I introduce a Japanese media character, but the quirky fan dub version because they spell hisn name with a 'z.' Seriously, who does that? Anyhoo, without further preamble allow me to introduce your newest co-host, Dartz.

Dartz: Hewwo hewwo iz gud to be hewh to tawk abwout da whutevwa we du'n yah?

Wv: I already love this decision. #NoRegrets. So I recently read Gyo--

Dartz: Guyyo? Dat de wun wid da guy n da soot wid da la-zer-beemz and dat?

Wv: N-no? The manga about the fish with the legs--

Dartz: Cwafish

Wv: No they were regular fish. Okay not regular, but they had robot legs--

Dartz: Fish ain't got nun dem legs. Go home girl yu drunk, tawk'n on the show 'bout da cwafish.

Wv: I would definitely read a story about crawfish with robot legs.

Dartz: Ah 'course you wood dats 'cause its a fwantastik idea girl!

Wv: It was pretty weird and creepy until the circus bit which kinda--

Dartz: Cwafish at'da ciwicus made it stop bein' creepy? Dats weerd, Ciwicus iz cweepy widout fish. Hm hm hm!

Wv: Right. I think that's enough material. Now we just wait for Cap to see this, and begin his volly of hilarious quasi-troll comments.

Wv: And waiting.

Wv: And waiting......

Dartz: Girl yu hung up like a undated howse fone. He ain't com'n girl. He dun gone and but gud.

Wv: He's coming. *Sniff* And he'll twist my comments into perverted word play. You'll see.

Dartz: Naw girl. Him dun and gone now. You got' let dat wun go on. We at da gwavesite girl!

Wv: I... is this what I do now? Spilling my issues all over the forum in the guise of meta-narrative comedy? How sad would that be?

Dartz: Its gonna be whut it be, but look at'it dis way. Awl dis time latah an you still wemembewing his legwacy.

Wv: So This is a weird sort of cross roads. I can keep this madness going in my own way, or I can lay it to rest here.

Wv: I guess we'll find out in another seven years or so.

*ᴱˡˡᶦᵖˢᵉˢ ᵃⁿᵈ ᵗᶦᵐᵉˢᵏᶦᵖˢ ᵃʳᵉ ᵗʰᵉ ᵉˣᵖʳᵉˢˢ ᶜᵒᵖʸʳᶦᵍʰᵗ ᵒᶠ ᵀᵒᵐᵐʸᵗʰᵉʰᶦᵗᵐᵃⁿ. ᵁˢᵉᵈ ʰᵉʳᵉ ʷᶦᵗʰ ᵖᵉʳᵐᶦˢˢᶦᵒⁿ

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wildvine

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#2 wildvine  Moderator

Disclaimer: I know I got a tad melancholy here, so for the record I have no indication that Cap is "gone" IRL. This was just putting his Gah character to rest. Of course he could always rise from his grave, an event that I'd love to happen.

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@wildvine: As I know I told Cap' at least once, you really shouldn't drink and post. lol