The Witch Doctor Of Thornbush Swamp biography

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dragonrampage

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#1  Edited By dragonrampage

The Witch Doctor of Thornbush Swamp

by borderline comic s

Location:

10 miles out of Golgotha City *there is a swamp full of bushes with many thorns. So its name is thornbush swamp. Its rough size is about 10 square miles.

Origin:

None known

Race :

Presumed human, unknown

Abilities:

By drawing a circle in the ground with a tomahawk then making a rune in the middle ( on tomahawk ) and then striking the ground it can activate a ring of unknown matter around people that is impenetrable. It can also teleport by drawing a rectangle with a opening on one side with a continuous straight line going to a circle with the rune on the ground. The portal is opened by its striking of the ground with the tomahawk . Note these portal or rings can be done long before hand in a way of preparing for a confrontation. Very smart in placing of these lines. Only it can control were the portals go. Is unkillable

Skills:

Has used tomahawk with great skill , has a basic knowledge of traps many more skills may be present. Has cloak with porcupine quills that are poisoned that it will throw at you with good aim.

Habits:

Always asks . What's a chaga chaga ? this appears to be the only thing it is able to say. Will have different tones almost screams whats a chaga chaga when shot, stabled or punched. Always scalps people but never keeps the scalp even though he wares scalps. Has exactly 37 scalps worn around waist ,arms ,feet ,wrists .

Gender:

Best guess at current is male but still unknown.

Looks:

I only have mobile so I can't post any pictures. I do have one on the profile.

Has ribcage on ....ribs

Chicken like feet

scalps on most joints

cloak made from feathers and poisoned porcupine quills

black/green cloth on most of body

the knees can reverse otherwise normal

bones on legs,arms,knee,and yes I am a bad artist

The tomahawk:

has human femur for handle

has rune on both sides

Thanks for reading:

I would love name ideas because , The Witch Doctor of Thornbush Swamp sounds super dumb.

That's the worst name I've ever made up. it lives in thornbush swamp so it has thornbush swamp then its a witch doctor so that equals a horrid name please help.

* reediting all posts more on Golgotha city later. expected to be done in the next five days hope you enjoyed.

Borderline comics is just a invention of mine Borderline: The borderline between good and evil ,but good will ultimately win!

Ever tired of movies,TV,and books making the bad guy " a tragic being" ? I am never going to do that you can always tell who's evil and who isn't good example above. The hero's will kill but they will still be different than the evil people .If this is cheesy or needs work let me know .

Bye,dragon rampage

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cbishop

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@dragonrampage: There is a tool bar at the top of the text box when you post. One of the options is "Img," which is for "Images." This will allow you to load the picture of your character to the post itself, like this:

No Caption Provided
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ImpurestCheese

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It should be Witch Doctor not which doctor

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dragonrampage

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New and improved

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dragonrampage

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I need a much better name please help

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batkevin74

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#8  Edited By batkevin74

@dragonrampage: Hi! Welcome to fan fiction

Let's start at the start. This may sound mean and overbearing but it's only because it's a critique to make you better. It's not personal it's a review.

Your title is spelt wrong. "The which docter of thornbush swamp" It also needs some punctuation. The Witch Doctor Of Thornbush Swamp. You fixed it in the story but not what people see on the forum page. Asides from morbid curiosity nobody will even look at it unless you get basic spelling on your title. Use the FULL EDIT button to fix this.

Now is this a character outline or a story. Even you don't seem to know. You need to work that out. And while character synopsis' are nice, they'd really rather a story about your weird femur wielding witch doctor than a bio on him/her/it.

this aperies to be the only thing it is able to say. Appears, the word is appears. Try writing on a word doc first before you post, it'll catch most grammar and spelling error BEFORE you post it up

Always scalps people but never keeps the scalp. Has exactly 37 scalps around waist ,arms ,feet ,wrists . Huh? Either he keeps the scalps or doesn't. This bit is confusing and needs work

As for a name, Goggle voodoo stuff. Google Haitian names. Hell call him Steve.

My suggestion is write a small opening chapter. Introduce us to Steve the Witch Doctor of Thornbush Swamp. Start by describing his day, what does Steve do when he wakes up? Does he eat a rat then scalp a bitch? Does he write 'What's a chaga-chaga?' in his own feces on the wall of his cave while a horrified young girl struggles to get free of the thorny vines he imprisoned her with. Does he actually live like a normal person during the week and then on weekends turn into this maniac?

You tell us!

@ us when you've got the new bit done. And do whatever you like with this advice; I'm no expert I just like writing.

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#9  Edited By dragonrampage
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#10  Edited By dragonrampage
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@dragonrampage: Errr no? That to me sounds silly, especially if he's asking it all the time. But it's your character, your story. Call them Mary Tinklefart up to you.

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#12  Edited By dragonrampage

Imam going to do the a story called the first of many . It will be about the chaga ,then I will do the dragoon files exposing the four main hero then explain what a dragoon is and then do the first encounter with the witch doctor with the oldest dragoon .