Hello.. I decided I would keep everything I have written in one place. Feel free to ignore this.
I only made one part for a lot of this stuff because I upon reading these the next day hated what I wrote. Bad habit, I know.
Teenage Mutant Ninja Spiders
Teenage Mutant Ninja Spiders - 8/11/14
"C'mon honey we both know I’m totally going to get fired for this. We need the money the paper pays me to write about Hockey! April if I do send this to my editor, he will put tear me limb by limb and then fire me!" His voice was a mix of stress and worry; he needed money to pay for his upcoming child.
"CASEY BERNID JONES, YOU ACTUALLY HAVE THE CHANCE TO BE A REAL REPORTER! YOU'RE GOING TO DO THIS!" Under the obvious rage is a undertone of certainty like she knows everything is going to be fine.
"HEY! I like writing about Hockey and have you even read what I wrote? It sounds like a cheap science fiction novel you'd get at the dollar store. No one is going to believe it's real for a second. Just sit and listen to what I wrote and maybe you'll understand why I can't publish it."
That was all she needed to hear to make her sit down on the couch. Casey turns on his laptop and opens the word file which contains the elusive story they are arguing over.
His voice soft "April, baby, promise me you won't speak while I read this?"
Her eyebrow is raised and his intentions are questioned but she replies with a quick “Yes, Casey"
Thus begins the reciting of how Casey met Teenage (That's what they say when people ask their age but it's highly questionable) Mutant (It's obvious they're abnormal) Ninja (Everyone is a ninja nowadays) Spiders (Or arachnids, either/or really, they probably don't care either way)
"It was about two weeks ago when my pregnant wife April wanted pizza at the ungodly hour of 2:39 AM. I being a loving husband went out and walked to the nearest pizza place. As any good New Yorker knows there’s a pizza place on every corner so I was able to walk to it in a quick five minutes. Now here is where everything takes a turn into the twilight zone. Four large spiders are standing in the shop, while the owner who I know moderately well is nowhere to be seen (I later find out he fainted after seeing the spiders). I'm an average guy so I did what an average guy would do when placed in this situation. I ran like the four horsemen had just arrived, honestly at that moment it wouldn't have surprised me if they had. Now what stopped me dead in my tracks was a "COWABUNGA DUDE!"
I stopped and turned around because the voice couldn't have come from a human. No, it was well; different you'd have to hear it to know it. As it turns out it came from a spider that was orange-ish I found this piece of information out when the orange-ish spider in the same demented voice yelled out "DOOOD, WHY ARE WE RUNNING?"
The spiders rush towards me and the only thing I can think is where are the cars? WHERE IS ANYONE? THIS IS NEW YORK THE CITY THAT NEVER SLEEPS! I would of thought more but the spiders had surrounded me and if you didn't think my night could get weirder you'd be wrong. The red-ish spider spits out at me "You no good punk! Who runs from the protectors of this city?"
The light blue one responds for me "Leave him alone Ralph, he's probably as scared as that pizza dude"
This was surreal I was in the middle of an empty street in the middle of the night surrounded by giant talking spiders. So I hope it is excusable when I freak out, I shut my eyes and screamed "PLEASE DON'T KILL ME!!!"
I open my eyes and they're gone. I walked slowly to my home with no pizza. This is how I know what the city is wrong. Those mysterious criminals who were hung up by webs were not done by a "Spider-Man" No, it was done by 4 charismatic and terrifying spiders. I know this from experience and I wish them luck in saving are city as long as they keep away from me." -- Casey Jones."