Today was a big day in the Marvel universe, as the 13th annual Avengers Convention took place. Following the last three previouse downers during the initiative, secret invasion by Skrulls, and Norman Osborn's reign, this convention promises to be spectacular. Being held in Avengers Tower as usual, only the costumed type were allowed entrance to this event. Many civilians clammour just to get a look inside, some even go as far as to try to come up with some phoney alter ego, like Corn Cobb Man. There's some sick people in this town. Either than that, the only way your getting admittance is to be a credited news reporter, wich I am.
Upon arrival to the legendary Stark Tower turned Avengers Tower, I was greated to a barricade set up by none other than those masters of home land security, S.H.E.I.L.D. After several background checks, cavity searches, D.N.A samples, questioning, interrogating, and being zapped by some lazer thingy developed by Reed Richards to revert Skrulls back to they're original form, I was in. Once on the floor, I didn't know where to start, All around was abuzz with the latest in hero news, and advancements. In one corner, Luke Cage and Iron Fist had a booth set up, explaining the financial benefits of becoming a Hero for Hire, while on the other side, Ms. Marvel, She Hulk, and Tigra were discussing women and the work place. Many Q and A booths were set up throughout the first floor, featuring panels consisting of the new Avengers, Younge Avengers, and Secret Avengers, although their appearance here doesn't make them real secret. But as any good nerd, I wanted to check out the tech before I moved on to questions.
I made my way to the second floor, where the technological advancements of tommorows super hero was being held. Once there, I was amazed at the the mechanized marvels presented throughout the place. My first stop was Reed Richards, otherwise known as Mr. Fantastic, expo. Thing was constantly survaying the display, making shure no one got close enough to touch. Reed was giving a speech on his new nanite powered wrist watches for heroes on the go. He claimed that heroes are constantly fighting super powered tyrants, aliens, gods, and low level punks, and that in these stressful work invironments, a watch is usually the first thing to go. So his idea, a normal wristwatch composed of self repairing nano-bots, so if your watch takes more a beating than you do it can instantly fix itself. After many hand raises, I finally got a question in edgewise. I asked," Mr. Richards, about your children, I've heard that there might be speculation that they are potentially very powerful meta-human's, and that your son Franklin was the reason for numerous heroes resurrection after the Onslaught event, your comments". Let's just say, I didn't get an answer, but I did get to feel the Things skin as he wrapped his hand around my wrist and yanked me out the crowd. I stayed and looked around the other tables, Tony Stark was showing off his new armor, the one he dubbed, the Bleeding Edge. After asking how he felt to be duped by a bunch of lizard people during the invasion, he had no problem displaying his new suits non-lethal repulsor settings. Every corner of the convention floor was alive with the twinklets and beeps of tech and aw, that I somewhat felt my self overwhelmed. I dicided to hit the restrooms to," freshen", up, but the line was back up so much it was rediculous. Luckly Cloak had a line set up to enter into the Darkforce Dimension for bathroom overflow. Never again will I go there, the things I saw I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy.
After returning, I decided it was time for some Q and A, and I was gonna snag me a personal interveiw with the man of the hour, Steve Rogers. First I went to the Henry Pym's table. There, him and Justice were dicussing the Avengers Academy for up and coming heroes, saying if you got powers or want to be a hero, enroll today. I made my way to the front of the crowd to ask Dr. Pym a question. I asked," Mr. Pym, what is it like being known under several different aliases. First Antman, then Giantman, then Goliath, then Yellowjacket, now the Wasp. Do you think your wife would be pleased with you taking her old moniker, also, how has your luck been with the ladies since your wifes death"? Ever felt a slightly enlarged boot to the face, I have. After I awoke several minutes later, after being trampled on by some convention spectaters, I was off once again. I walked over to the table where Spider-man, Spider-woman, Arachne, and Arana were giving a lecture on the day of a life of an arachnid based hero. I almost jumped out of my skin to get noticed by one of the Spider based vigilantes, but they had been warned about my questions by Justice, that c-list jerk. Luckly Arana was nice enough to call me, unbeknownst to her fellow panel members. My question, simple," Ms. Arana is it, where exactly do you fit in? Can you produce psy-webs, or any of that good stuff. I've only seen you use gadgets, perhaps you should be on the second floor, and to you other two ladies, have you ever, you know, been together? Also, to Arachne, during your time with Alpha Flight or Omega Flight, Canada's premeire hero team, did you perhaps have any kind of relationship with say U.S. Agent or Sasqautch, or even perhaps Beta-Ray Bill, and lastely, Mr. Spider-man, are you going to release a press statement next time you decide to change costumes, because I'm tired of you going through several different looks every month. It's either red and blue or black with you, yeesh"! Lets just say, psy-webs hurt. I tried to make my way to the Godly panel, featuring Q and A from Thor and Hurcules, but they had set up some sort of archane force feild that kept me out. Darn you Justice!
With the convention winding down, I decided to hit two final Q and A panels. First, the X-men. They had numerous booths set up, some promoting mutant support and acceptance, others stating help fund Utopia, so we don't have to move back in to mainland. In the mist of all this was the panel, consisting of Magneto, Emma Frost, Cyclops, Wolverine, Beast, and the newest addition to the team, Hope Summers. Oh the questions I wanted to ask. First, I was going to ask Magneto if he had really changed his way, or if he was just siding with the mutants based on low mutant recruitment for his,"brotherhood". Second, I was going to ask Emma why she felt that she always had to dress like a hooker, as leader of Xaveir's school for the gifted, shouldn't she dress more appropriately? To Cyclops, does he feel that Jean is excepting of his relationship with Emma in the afterlife, Emma dressing like a whore and all. To Logan, how does he feel having basically two basterd children, refering to Daken and Laura, to Beast, does he shed often, and finally to Hope, what are your powers, and how the heck is she going to save mutants? Before I could even get to the crowd, I heard a voice in my head telling me that if I so much as utter a single word, my mind would be psychically wiped, and I'd be voiding my bowels for the rest of my life. So, I stayed away. Finally I got to the Avengers section. First, I approuched the Younge Avengers table. After asking Patriot if he feels comfortable being a bad role model for youths, and Hawkeye why she couldn't come up with a more original name instead of taking the older versions name, and finally the relation between Hulkling and Wiccan, what's that like? Next thing I know I'm instantly poofed outside Avengers tower. After sneeking my way back in, I made my way to the Avengers section once again. I made my way to the Avengers panel, where Bucky and Gaurdian were answering questions. The Vision intercepted me and told me that it would be wise to stay clear of their table. DARN YOU JUSTICE! You blacklisting freak! I wasn't able to ask the other avengers any questions either, like if Moonknight felt he was mentally stable enough to join the team, or why didn't valkery have anything better to do, and if Eric O'grady if he felt he could fill Scott Langs shoes and so much more. But, thank god I was able to catch Steve Rogers off gaurd, and sit down with him for a personal interveiw. After discussing our service backgrounds, him army, mine Marine Corp, we discussed some events happening. First I asked," what's it like being shot in the head"? He answered," not to nice, next question". I asked," how come Bucky gets the cooler costume, it's more sleek and shiney, why didn't you take the look during the raid on Asgard". He answered," it's more his thing now, I prefer to keep it that way. Next question". I went through a barrage of need to know questions, like, what female heroes have you been intimate with, or, Hitler, what was he like, and the classic chessnut, do you feel you might of made a mistake during the Civil War? All the good stuff. Well, through it all, he answered my questions. Once we were done, we shook hands and parted ways.
After crossing the S.H.E.I.L.D exit clearance check, I was on my way home. After crossing an empty trash can, I tossed my fake press pass away. Those idiots should have known the D.B had been trashed thanks to Electro. I went home, and wrote my amazing journey down in my diary. So, hooray for me!