The Mighty Incredibles Rated T

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MenaceForever2

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#1  Edited By MenaceForever2

Hello everyone this will be a four part story about the Incredibles who were a Superhero family in the pixar movie The Incredibles. Before we start i will give you some feats and facts about them

  • Violet Parr is the daughter of Bob and Helen Parr and has the ability of invisibility and force field generation. She is able to turn herself and others invisible by touch and create sturdy force fields able to withstand tons of force.
  • Dash Parr is the first son of Bob and Helen Parr and has the ability to run at speeds up to 190mph and has shown faster reaction speeds than a normal human and to be able to make his other limbs move at super speed.
  • Bob Parr is the father of Violet and Dash and the husband of Helen Parr and has the ability of super strength, high durability and sharp senses. He has shown to be able to withstand tremendous amounts of physical trauma.
  • Helen Parr is the mother of Violet and Dash Parr and the wife of Bob Parr and has minimum thickness is stated as 1 mm, which would limit her stretch distance to 30 meters; however, the Operation Kronos database states that she can stretch up to 300 feet and leap up to 80 feet.As part of stretching, Elastigirl displays some amount of invulnerability. Forced stretching, even under several tons of load, appears to cause pain and discomfort but no permanent or even temporary harm. A high degree of protection is also afforded by her super suit. Combined with flexibility, this should make her immune to bullets, though this is never demonstrated save when she is caught by doors while sneaking into Syndrome's compound and manages to have a ricochet of bullets deflected from hitting her leg by her boots. She can be knocked out by blunt force, however, as demonstrated by the destruction of a plane carrying her, Violet, and Dash on board, though she quickly regains consciousness. She can use her elasticity to throw objects with far more force than her slight stature would imply, as in one scene in which she supports the weight of a Winnebago suspended during plane during flight. She has also shown the ability to shape shift with her elasticity. An example of this is when she transformed into a boat in the middle of the ocean to get her children, Violet and Dash, to shore.

Now its time for the Mighty Incredibles

Hello my name is Violet Parr and am here to tell you about what happened after the Underminer's defeat.

"Hello Heroes are you ready to die" said the Underminer

" Kids lets do this" said Bob

We changed into there uniforms and got ready to attack until we saw that the Underminer had hundreds of creatures that were charging at them. Bob told me to turn myself and Dash invisible and defeat the Underminer while he and Helen defeated the monsters.We followed his commands and i turned us invisible and went to defeat the Underminer. Helen leaped to the monsters and started to fight the creatures. She threw them all over the parking lot while Bob threw cars and fought them hand to hand pulverizing them. Dash and I have made there way to the Underminer. Dash speed blitz's him and I traps him in a force field we meet up with our parents who have defeated all of the creatures. Bob tells them that they did a good job and thinks that it is over....... I know better than to think that it was over.

All characters belong to there rightful owners

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#2  Edited By MenaceForever2

When we got home we fell to sleep. This was when the dreams started happening. In the dream I was on a field. Around me was my family Dad was covered under a truck and Mom was impaled by a spear on a wall. Dash was lying on the ground blood spilling from his mouth. I then noticed that I was in the dream I was crying when behind me I was struck with a laser. I looked and the man said "Hello sis". I threw a shield at him and turned invisible. I ran as fast as I could but he apperead in front of me. I asked who he was and he said " Jack-Jack" then I woke up. I instantly went to my parents and told them of the dream. They told me that i may have the ability of prohetic dreaming. I asked why I never had one before. Mom told me that sometimes the future changes and and only certain futures come to you. I asked her why Dash was still a child and Jack-Jack was an adult. Dad answered that question he said that she might not be the only one with a new ability.

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deadpoolrules

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#3  Edited By deadpoolrules

Just for you to continue

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#4  Edited By MenaceForever2

@deadpoolrules: what does that mean

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#5  Edited By deadpoolrules

@menaceforever said:

@deadpoolrules: what does that mean

Continue your story.

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#6  Edited By MenaceForever2

@deadpoolrules: oh well should I is it good because to be honest i was making it as i went

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#7  Edited By MenaceForever2

I'm sorry for the newly found grammar errors

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#8  Edited By Lunacyde  Moderator

@menaceforever said:

When we got home we fell to sleep. This was when the dreams started happening. In the dream I was on a field. Around me was my family Dad was covered under a truck and Mom was impaled by a spear on a wall. Dash was lying on the ground blood spilling from his mouth. I then noticed that I was in the dream I was crying when behind me I was struck with a laser. I looked and the man said "Hello sis". I threw a shield at him and turned invisible. I ran as fast as I could but he apperead in front of me. I asked who he was and he said " Jack-Jack" then I woke up. I instantly went to my parents and told them of the dream. They told me that i may have the ability of prohetic dreaming. I asked why I never had one before. Mom told me that sometimes the future changes and and only certain futures come to you. I asked her why Dash was still a child and Jack-Jack was an adult. Dad answered that question he said that she might not be the only one with a new ability.

It has a promising start, and definitely isn't bad but there is a lot of improvements you could make.

Firstly, try not to use "said" all the time. It gets repetitious and boring. Either try to use descriptive words(Ex. Shouted, whispered, drawled, hissed, etc) or in situations where we can't confuse who is talking it's possible to not say anything, just start a new paragraph with the next person speaking. Another option is to immediately follow what the character is saying with an action. (For Example) "What do you mean?" Sokka wrung his hands nervously. By doing this you are letting the reader know who is talking without coming out and telling them. This leads ot my second bit of advice...

Less telling, more showing. It's more effort, but it's worth it. Instead of telling me So and so was angry, show them being angry. Use the scene to convey what everyone is thinking and feeling trough their actions and dialogue. This will make your story more interesting and resonate better with the reader.

Keep at it. Writing is just like anything else...practice practice practice.

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#9  Edited By MenaceForever2

The next day was even worse, yesterday my father told me that Jack-Jack may have the ability of time adaption. He said that it was one of the rarest abilities on the planet. The main concept of the ability is to be able to go into the future or past and adapt yourself to that future such as if you were a genius in the future you can transfer that knowledge your current state of being. As soon as he told me that fear trembled over my body I just wanted to go into my parents arms and cry but I knew that would do no good. I went back to my room and went to sleep peacefully.

That morning I woke up to a cry from my mother. My heart racing I tripped and fell into the living room. I got up and saw Jack-Jack but not the cute baby that I love, the evil man that I feared. He was dressed in a white tee and jeans. He calmly told me that he accidentally went into the future and transferred almost all of his future persona's physical attributes. A six pack, a faded beard, short brown hair, and a larger set of abilities that included power mimicry, power reduction, lightning production, telekinesis,and spauntaneous regeneration. I demanded to know where Mom was when from behind me a bed came flying thru the living room but Jack-Jack easily dodged . I saw that it was my father and put a force field in front of him to stop him from murdering Jack-Jack. While Jack-Jack told his story to dad I saw Dash that looked like he had just got out of bed ( which was probraly correct) and he asked what was going on and where was Mom. I breifed him on what happened and asked Jack-Jack again where was mom. He told us that she was right there by the couch passed out from shock. I released the force field but made Dad promise not to hurt Jack-Jack, he agreed but we all knew that even Dad couldn't defeat this new Jack-Jack