Royal Punch: The Kings

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waezi2

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He was dressed in a blue doublet with an extremely high standing collar that reached his ears. The collar was bad enough as it was, but the very tight pants that made it almost unbearable to stand... or sit for that matter.

And this gold collar, his “livery collar” weighted a ton and made his neck stiff.

The man with light-brown skin and freckles wearing this costume looked like he was dressed for a job he was not suited for. That was a problem since Pater the Human was the ruler of the kingdom Nesredna. And he felt awful about what he had to do this day.

Pater sat on his throne at the end of rectangular the table in the council room. Around the table were important human men and women seated who were the members of the royal council. They were dressed almost as uncomfortable as Pater were, but they just wore it better than him.

Pater took a glance at the painting at the wall parallel to him. The room had paintings of the ten kings and queens before him and were organized so that the regent before him would be the one he saw while looking straight forward. The queen in the painting had her beautiful blond hair collected in crown braids. Her clothes cowered most of her body, including almost all of her neck.

A shame, since Minerva’s body was athletic.

Pater looked at the painting and sighed as he wondered if his late wife would approve of what the council had talked him into.

There came a cough from the woman who was dressed in green and had her hair was rolled into some kind of updo. She was Lady Margaret. She then stood up. “Sire, I think I speak for every human in this room when I say that what you are about to do takes courage.”

“Hear, hear!” The exclamation of approval came from the tall man wearing the beret with a phoenix feather attached to it. The feather was burning, making it even more stylish. The wearer of this hat was Lord Eden. “The orcs are barbarians, you have to show them that humanity and the kingdom Nesredna are not weak.”

Lady Inger nodded. She was dressed in a tiger coat for (or so she claimed) religious reasons. “Your people will thank you for this day, your highness. As a matter of fact, this will be the highlight of your legacy.”

There was nothing but agreement from the four other men and women or great importance who were also part of the royal council and had been part of the council since Minerva’s father had been king.

Pater recalled once that Minerva had joked that she only kept the council members so she could hear the opinions of people she did NOT agree with so she could do the exact opposite of what they advised her to do.

Pater however had always been a bit of a yes-man. He took a glance at his secretary Nora who focused on writing and not looking at him.

***

Pater was on his way to the highest tower of the castle, the one used for when the monarch were to meet a foreign guest of great importance. He was escorted by two of the castle guards, both of them armed with spears and were dressed in their three-colored uniform with high boots and ruff collar.

Pater never understood the appeal of ruff collars and why so many humans used them.

They walked up the stairs till they reached the door to the tower. In front of the door stood two guards. They were dressed in bronze armor that covered their torso, had helmets that covered their entire heads and necks, with slits for the eyes and mouth. The helmets had some sort of decorative topping that seemingly were made of red animal hair. These guards also carried spears, but they were armed with round shields as well.

But what separated them the most from Pater’s guards were green-skinned. Something Pater’s guards were very aware of. Pater noticed that the room had gotten slightly warmer and looked to his left and saw that one of his guards had created a small fireball he held in his back hand and was itching after getting the chance to throw. Same could be said about his colleague.

“Hey! None of that.” Pater gave his men a glare. “These creatures are our guest.”

“Apologies, your highness.” Both the human guards bowed their heads.

“Right.” Pater cleaned his throat, then turned his attention toward the foreign guards. “If you don’t mind, I am about to have a meeting with your liege.” The guards dressed in bronze nodded and moved away from the door. Pater opened it, but before entering the room, he gave the four guards a look. “So... The four of you. Be nice.” Pater then closed the door.

The human guards looked at the orc ones. Each of them very awkwardly.

“So... um... hey?”

“Sup?”

***

The large orc was dressed in red robes a white tunic as well as wearing a golden laurel wreath on his head. He sat on the edge of the table inside the room where he was about to meet Pater. He had picked one of the books at the shelf in the room and studied it out of boredom.

King Bathala couldn’t read since his kind did not believe in the dependence of writing, but there were drawn illustrations in it. He scratched the big scar on his left cheek, a bad habit of his. He guessed that the book was about creature races as the illustrations in it were less than flattering pictures of what humans apparently thought of other creatures. Like the one that were suppose to look like an orc that portrait his kind as some sort of hulking monster with drool running from his mouth. Bathala almost laughed at the club the caricature was armed with.

“Is it a good book?”

Bathala looked up and saw that king Pater had entered the room. “Ah, well... let’s just say that it is educational to see what you pink-skins- ah, wait.” Bathala blinked and slightly blushed as he realized that Pater was not pink but was... whatever color he was. “I mean, that you humans thinks of other creatures.”

Pater took the book. He read the title which was Monsters Around The World. “Unbelievable. I thought we had gotten rid of this bigoted relic.” And then he opened a window and threw the book out of it.

Bathala raised an eyebrow and smirked. “That was a bit extreme.”

Pater shrugged. “It was garbage.”

“Now then.” Bathala clapped his hand and then waved one hand at the bowl and knife on the table. “Let’s get on with it, shall we?”

Pater looked at the bowl and gulped. This was gonna suck. “Bathala... Bathala, we need to talk.”

“Look, I know it may seem dramatic for a human like you since your skin is much softer than that of an orc. But once we both sliced our hands and mixed our blood in this bowl, our contract will be complete. The war will be over.”

“Bathala...” Pater felt awful “I... I can’t give you Ceto Island.”

Bathala just stared at him. His face was frozen in great shock for a couple of seconds. Then he sighed, sat at one of the two chairs at the table. He took of his crown and nudged his head. “I don’t believe it.”

“Bathala, look. If it stood to me, I would give you Ceto without hesitation, I would. But... but you have to understand... it... it is complicated. But... we could renegotiate, we could figure something out-”

“SHUT UP!”

Pater took a step backward as the big orc slammed his fist on the table with so much force that it sounded like an explosion.

“MY LORD!” One of the human guards entered the room.

“Go. Everything is fine. Leave us.” Pater turned his attention back to the orc king after his guard had left them. The expression on Bathala’s face told Pater that everything was very much not fine. “Bathala, you don’t understand-”

“No. YOU don’t understand.” The orc pointed an denouncing finger at Pater. “Do you realize that I put my head on the block by coming to the kingdom of my enemies? That I took a great risk because I chose to trust you, that I thought you meant it when you wanted peace? I trusted you despite the eons of hostility between our species, and I did so because you gave me your word. And as the fool I apparently am, I trusted you to be a man of word!”

“Bathala, I have my subject to-”

The orc king interrupted Pater with a mocking laughter. “Oh, I get it! Let me guess: Your advisors have talked your round ears off about how this would put you in a bad light, eh? And I am ready to bet my tusks that the people of this kingdom have been less than happy about you striking a deal with a big mean green barbarian. Tell me if I’m wrong. Please interrupt me if I missed the mark.”

Pater said nothing.

“You really think that I did not have that problem at home? You believe I’m popular right now? That my own kind is not calling my a traitor for trying to make nice with a bunch of pink-skins? But unlike you, I actually have enough backbone to keep my end of a deal because I have integrity enough and I want what is best for my kind, even if they will resent me for it.”

Pater sighed as he sat at the chair at the end of the table opposite to Bathala. “Look, we can figure something out-”

“No.” Bathala stood up. “No, we can not. You gave me your word and then spat me in the face. I can’t trust you, human. I can’t even walk out of that door since for all I know, there could be assassins waiting for me when I leave this tower. If you are not a man of your word, you might be deceive enough to plan on getting rid of me.”

Pater forgot to feel like a rat as he was now confused. “Um... How are you gonna leave then?”

Bathala took off one of his golden rings. “For the window.”

Pater blinked. “For the-”

CRASH

Pater dropped his jaw as the orc king jumped though the glass window. He heard a splash, one probably made when Bathala landed in the moat around the castle.

All four guards entered the room. Pater looked tired as he pointed at the shattered glass. “The king has left us.”

***

Elanora the Elf sat in her study and did the accounting of castle expenses. Her quill scratched the paper as she did the math in her head. Everything in her study was crafted so that it would not be a problem for her to reach or do anything despite her short stature that almost made one believe she was a dwarf of some sort. If it had not been for her pointy ears and her young looks despite being past fifty, you would not have guess that she was of the same race as the tall beautiful dicks known as elves. Nora took a break from writing as she heard someone knock on the door, so she adjusted her glasses and scratched the back of her pointy ear as she went and opened the door. The human king stood there. “Can I come in?”

Nora shrugged. “It’s your castle, you highness.”

Pater entered and took the normal-sized chair Nora kept in the room for guests. He took a quick glance at Nora’s collection of bows and crossbows that hanged on the wall before he sat down. Nora kept writing. “Nora... do you think I did the right thing? I mean, I could have risked a revolution in Nesredna if I had given Bathala that island.”

“I’m not a regent, your highness.” Nora did not lift her glance from her writing and kept scratching with her quill. “I doubt my opinion is worth-”

“Oh, cut the crab, would you?!” Pater snapped. “I had a bad day, just talk to me like a... like a normal person or something.”

Nora glanced at Pater, then she laid down her pen and rested her chin on her folded hands as she looked at the human she had known since he was a boy. “Alright. I can do that. Here’s some real talk.” She narrowed her eyes. “Pater, don’t expect me to be your moral compass just because I used to be your babysitter. You are a grown-ass man and a monarch. GET YOU SHIT TOGETHER, WOULD YA?!”

Pater opened his mouth. Then he closed it. And then he groaned. “Alright, that’s fair.”

“Yeah, I would say so. Now, I have to get this shit done before bed.”

“Yeah... goodnight.” Pater stood up and looked defeated as he went for the door.

“Pater, wait.” Pater turned and looked at Nora who looked concerned. “Look, I get it. Your job sucks.”

Pater shrugged and closed the door.

***

The maid Bismuth had left Pater alone with his five-year-old daughter so he could read her a bedtime story. She looked forward to washing her beard.

After Pater had finished reading The Goblin in the Pot and closed the book. “Alright, nugget.” Pater kissed princess Dimicatio on the forehead. Now it’s time for you to go to bed.”

The little blond girl who had her father’s freckles frown. “Dad, I don’t wanna go to bed. I will have that bad dream again!”

“A bad dream?” Pater lifted Dimi up and carried her to bed. “What sort of bad dream?”

Dimi wrapped her arms around her father’s neck. “Someone took me away from the castle. From you! And I was sent far, far away. And you weren’t there!”

Pater placed her in her bed with wooden carvings of flowers and pulled her blanket over her. He then gently stroke her head. “How about I go fetch a pillow and sleep next to your bed? If you have that dream again and wake up, you can see that I’m here. But you have to promise you will try falling asleep, okay?”

Dimi frowned. “Okay, I will try.”

“But you have nothing to worry about.” Pater smiled. You are not going anywhere.”

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waezi2

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