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#1 Posted by Cryo-Wolf (12343 posts) - - Show Bio

Ok, so, this was a paper I wrote for english class this year. We had to use vocabulary in it so if you don't understand a word.....use dictionary.com. It probably won't be as good as some other stories on here, but I got a 92 out of 100 so, yeah....

A light wind blew against Scott's face as he trudged through the snow. "We're almost there!" Scott shouted. Even in this freezing weather, he was still jocund. Scott was a veterinary student in college. He was on a research trip in the Rocky Mts. for information on timber wolves. Some of his fellow veterinary students had come along. Art, a rich kid who thought he owned everything and everyone, and who's Daddy had payed for everything he ever owned, persisted to omplain that his boots were sopping. Scott ignored him and helped a girl he knew, Melody, up to the top of the ridge. They had come across many beautiful landforms on their journey, including a huge gorge, but none compared to the valley that stood below them. It looked like a giant rocky bowl, the forest that lay in the valley the cereal in it.

"It's beautiful." Melody said.

"Yeah...it sure is." Scott said. Scott turned around and told everyone that they were there. Of course, Art had to complain again. They set up camp in a clearing in the valley below. "We'll start our research tomorrow!" Scott said.

That night, it seemed colder than ever. One of the girls got up to get some fresh water from a creek nearby. She was careful to bring a tranquilizer gun, just in case. On her way through the wilderness to the creek, she heard a deafening howl pierce the night. She gripped her tranquilizer gun tighter in her hand. Back at camp, Melody awoke to the howl and got out of the tent to follow the source of the howl. She headed for the creek.

The girl had just finished filling up her canteen when she heard a rustling in the bushes behind her. She whirled around and held up her tranquilizer gun.

"Whoa, whoa! It's just me!" Melody said. The girl sighed. "Did you see any wolves yet?" Melody asked.

"No. Not yet but I did-" She was cut off in mid sentence. A huge animal punced on her from the bushes. Melody screamed and fell bacl. The beast plowed the girl into the bushes, growling and snarling the whole time. All Melody could hear were muffled screams and finally nothing. She noticed the girl had dropped the Tranquilizer gun. Melody grabbed it and fired a dart at the beast. The dart skinned the animal's paw and left a huge scratch. The animal turned and glared at Melody. She was frozen in fear, the beast's glowing yellow eyes staring into her soul. It suddenly ran off into the distance, leaving her behind. After a few minutes in her state of shock, Melody didn't noticed the hand on her shoulder. She flinched and whirled around.

"It's just me!" Scott said.

"Don't Scare me like that!" Melody screamed.

"What happened? I heard some screams and then.......then I thought someone was hurt so I ran over here!" Scott explained.

"She's worse than hurt Scott, She's dead!" Melody replied. She pointed over to the bushes. Scott went over to see the gruesome sight and then noticed something.

"Hey, Mel, look at this!" he said,"The pawprints turn into footprints!"

"How is that possible!?" she asked. Scott shrugged his shoulders.

"Whatever it was, and whatever happened, we need to get everyone out of here as soon as possible." Scott replied.

"But what about our research? We haven't sterted yet!" Melody asked.

"Everyone's lives are more important than research. If this thing's still out there, it could come back and get the rest of us. We'll get some rest and leave in the morning." Scott answered. He turned and started walking back to camp. On the way, Melody noticed a huge scratch on Scott's left hand. It was the same hand as the monster's scratch.

"H-how did you get that scratch?" Melody questioned Scott looked at his hand.

"Oh....umm...I must've gotten it on the way here and didn't notice. Melody looked at him skeptically and walked on. At camp, they dispersed to their tents. Scott, unfortunately, set up next to art. As he apporached, Scott noticed Art wasn't there. Scott had a suspicious look on his face as he entered his tent.

In the morning, Scott gathered everyone around him and told them what happened. There were gasps and crie from everywhere.

"There are only eight of us left. We need to leave now or else we might be next," he said,"There's a wooded pass west of where we entered. We can get out quicker if we go that way. Pack up and be ready to leave in five minutes."

"You tell us this now!? I just woke up and we have to leave in five minutes!? We didn't even start our stupid research yet!" Art complained. He didn't even seem phased by the recent death.

"I don't care if you judt got up, get your beauty sleep when we're not in danger!" Scott retorted. Art scoffed at him and started back to his tent. On their way out of the clearing, Melody told Scott that Art wasn't there. He told everyone to speed up.

"What about Art?" Melody asked.

"We can't stop for one person while that thing is out there! And besides, there's something suspicious about that guy, like he's hiding something." Melody remembered the scratch on Scott's hand and thought he was hiding something. Before she could say anything, Scott was gone. She decided to keep moving. After a few minutes, she heard a commoion in the bushes. She turned around to see what was happening and suddenly, like lightning, the beast struck down a man in the back. She yelled at everyone to run for it. They were all running as fas as they could through the pass. The monster was picking them off, one by one. Melody turned and started running up the mountain, trying to get away from it. When she got to a cliff, she noticed that only one man had followed her.

"Where's everyone else? Did they get away?" Melody asked. When the man looked down, Melody assumed the worst and looked down herself. The man walked to the edge of the cliff and caught his breath.

Melody suddenly heard the man scream and shot her head up in time to see him being pulled over the edge by the monster. His scream slowly faded as the beast pulled itself onto the cliff. Melody finally got a good look at it. It looked like a wolf, but almost....human, like a werewolf.

"I know who you are, Scott! Every time the human you isn't there, this monster shows up. And you evenn have the scratch on your hand from the tranquilizer dart!" Melody screamed. It all made sense. Everything fit together.

The werewolf ust stared at her and then started changing. His claws retracted and his fur disappeared. Melody's expression faded from anger to surprise. It wasn't Scott sanding n front of her.

"Who said anything about that loser?" Art said. Art was the werewolf. He was the source of all their problems from the very beginning. Now it as clear why Art had even wanted to o on this trip in the first place. He never liked research. He started walking toward her, an evil look flaring in his eye. Melody slowly inched back and then fell to the ground.She stared up, terrified. She prayed for someone to help her.

Suddenly, there was a loud howl from the bushes behind her. Art looked over at the bushes with great surprise. Melody looked up as another huge werewolf jumped over her and tackled Art to the ground. Melody was surprised there were two of them, but the new one seemed to be fighting on her side. Art transformed and lunged at the werewolf. The fight seemed to go on forever. Finally, the werewolf knocked Art over the edge. His howl slowly faded into a scream. Melody turned her focus towards the werewolf. He, like Art, transformed into his human form. Scott turned around and asked if Melody was ok.

"You? But I thought....what about the scratch on your hand?" She questioned.

"I told you," Scott said,"I got it on the wa to try and help you at the creek. I was worried, so I didn't noticed when the branch scratched me." Scott was surprised when Melody ran up and hugged him.

"Thanks." She said, crying. Her head was buied in Scott's arms, her own arms wrapped tightly around him.

"No Problem, Anytime." Scott said. The two started walking through the woods to the bottom of the mountain.

"Hey," Melody asked,"what are we going to say when we get home about this? A killer werewolf used us as his personal buffet?"

Scott thought about it for a second. "Freak avalanche?" He suggested. They both smiled and agreed, continuing to walk back to civilization.At the bottom of the mounatin, ar lay buried under a pile of snow. He had lain motionless under the snow for days now when suddenly, his hand shot up from deep underneath the snow.

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#2 Posted by The WeatherMan (3261 posts) - - Show Bio

Not bad. Decent dialogue, maybe a little too much of it?Everything else is good.


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#3 Posted by Dean 13 (120 posts) - - Show Bio

THANKS! (this is Cryo's other character) Again, I had to d it for school and use vocabulary, so I didn't think it was gonna be good.

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#4 Posted by Mighty Magneto (13076 posts) - - Show Bio

What did the teach think about it

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#5 Posted by Dean 13 (120 posts) - - Show Bio

92 out of 100. i think that's like an A or -A.

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#6 Posted by Mighty Magneto (13076 posts) - - Show Bio

An A is an a minus or not good work man

Not your best work but i like it