Marvel Iron Age: Tales From The Empire Vol 2 #5

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batkevin74

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#1  Edited By batkevin74

More Iron Age (both old stuff & ongoing stuff) can be found here: http://www.comicvine.com/forums/fan-fic-8/marvel-iron-age-library-1511067/#47

This is an episodic ongoing story that tells tales from around the world of the Iron Age

Part 1:http://www.comicvine.com/forums/fan-fic-8/marvel-iron-age-tales-from-the-empire-vol-2-1-1510283/#17

Part 2:http://www.comicvine.com/forums/fan-fic-8/marvel-iron-age-tales-from-the-empire-vol-2-2-1511203/#13

Part 3:http://www.comicvine.com/forums/fan-fic-8/marvel-iron-age-tales-from-the-empire-vol-2-3-1511898/#6

Part 4: http://www.comicvine.com/forums/fan-fic-8/marvel-iron-age-tales-from-the-empire-vol-2-4-1512076/#9

**

Troop Transport, Italy bound

“Who the hell would want me dead?” asked Scalphunter as he taped a pen to his lips “I mean I’m lovable, oh so starking charming and pretty! Correction; damn HOT! Let’s make a list shall we. Supreme Commander, der! Every starking time we’re in the same room WHAM telekinetic sandwich! Such a stark hole! So that’s one…who else?”

Scalphunter drew his sword and twirled it to stimulate his mind. After finding out he had a bounty on his head, he was curious and slightly furious that someone who assassinate the ultimate assassin. He looked at the team of Iron Soldiers in the planes hangar bay, all rigid and focused.

“Hey! HEY YOU!” he clicked his fingers in front of the young man’s eyes.

“Sir, yes sir!”

“Wowsers, you are an eager little puppy!” chuckled Scalphunter “Do you want to kill me?”

“Sir, no sir!”

“You sure? You’ve got them shifty eyes that tell lies!” Scalphunter drew his face so close to the soldier that if he blinked he’d brush him with his eyelashes. “What do you say to that?”

“Sir, no sir!”

Scalphunter pulled back and placed his sword under the man’s chin “How about if I’m going to kill you? Right here, right now.” The soldier quivered in fear “Just kidding! Psyche! Geez I’m off balance but I ain’t crazy!”

Scalphunter walked to the back of the plane and took a seat on a crate of rations “Ooooo Iron Claw! That Chechyen psycho wants me dead, but enough to pay someone else to do it? Falcon Helfitta! How could I forget Falcy! I raped and murdered his wife, I think? He wants me dead no questions. Hey soldier boy! Thanks, got the brain juices flowin!”

Scalphunter furiously scribbled more and more names onto the paper.

**

“Holy stark!” Scalphunter looked at the almost comical scroll of names of people who potentially wanted to kill him “That’s a lotta names!”

The familiar click of a high powered pistol echoed in Gerald’s ear as the barrel burrowed into his temple “Get off my plane!”

Scalphunter glanced out the corner of his eye “Mark 12 Desert Fox .50 Cal revolver, classic!”

“Would you get off my plane! We’ve been landed for over an hour and you’re still onboard!”

“You in a hurry…Major McDonald?” asked Scalphunter rolling up his note as he peered at the officers name badge “McDonald? Asides from the clown I knew a McDonald! Doom blew a hole through his chest.”

He holstered his weapon “That was my brother Juan”

“Those were the days! Morten got the air sucked out of his lungs, Bieber got fried, shame Mortimer didn’t get killed!” laughed Scalphunter. “Morty the little stark! He’d put money to get someone to kill me coz he’s such a useless stark!” He returned to his scribbling.

“Off the plane!” said the major.

“I technically outrank you major” warned Scalphunter waving his finger.

“I actually don’t care!” he snapped “I’ve got a million other things to do!”

“Do you want to kill me?” asked Scalphunter.

“Will my saying yes, get you off my plane?”

“What’s your name?”

“Stark! I’ll tell you, if you leave my plane right now with no more question, okay?” groaned the exasperated major “It’s Tracy, Tracy McDonald”

Scalphunter yelped “But that’s a girl’s name! And you’re a boy! Bwhahahahaha!”

Major McDonald grabbed Scalphunter by the scruff of the neck and frogmarched him off the plane as the assassin wet his pants with laughter.

**

Ferrum, Lab 7D, Brooklyn Heights

No Caption Provided

Conway and Ardu reassembled the body of Jack Payden. Most of him was there, the bits that weren’t were filled in with hot plastic resin. Jack looked like something out of an old horror film with crude plastic stitching holding his limbs to his torso.

“He’s got six fingers on his left hand!” stated Conway “Was he a mutant?”

“Oh stark, that was me. Sorry” said Ardu as he tore off the second pinkie finger.

“How’d you even get this high without being able to count?” asked Conway.

“You’re a real funny starker!” said Ardu throwing the finger at Conway who shrieked like a girl who’d been accosted by a flying cockroach. Ardu burst into a fit of laughter until Conway grabbed a hold of the bucket holding Jack’s shredded organs.

“Don’t!” warned Ardu as he slowly backed away.

“Not so funny now, is it?” growled Conway as he tensed as if to throw causing Ardu to jump back in fear.

**

Asgardia

No Caption Provided

Loki sat in deep thought at the head of the long table inside the castle which the remaining gods had been calling Odinshire, after his long dead adoptive father. The name repulsed him but there was little he could do about it. He’d learnt from the years gone by that ruling with the fist only worked for a while. He raised an eyebrow when he noticed Skoval’s seat empty at dinner.

“Is he unwell?” asked Loki pointing at the empty chair.

“He went out to clear his head,” answered Hephaestus the Greek god of the forge, but seeing Loki’s face quickly added “Milord”

“Has anyone bothered to find out?” Loki looked around at the fraction who remained of both the Asgardian and Olympian pantheons.

“I shall” answered Njord as he stood.

Loki gripped his wine goblet and noted that when the time was right, Njord would be having a long unpleasant discussion about titile, rank and nobility.

**

Chicago

Stryfe looked at the Staff of One on his desk. He hated magic! It had rules yet broke all of them. And this…stick had the power to rewrite reality. Scalphunter months ago blew up a vital cog in the New Latverian supply lines; one Silver Sable. Stryfe had watched the event from Gerald’s mind, quite delightful watching a woman with lungs full of nitro-glycerine explode into pieces as her children watched one.

He had found out from the limited magical tomes he had access to, that the phrasing when using the staff had to be precise. The consequences for saying something that had been “wished” for already could prove fatal.

“I hate you!” he told it as he circled around the desk. It didn’t come with an instruction manual, it didn't have a mind he could read and he’d already killed most magic users just in case of betrayal. Also giving the staff to someone else could prove disastrous for himself. He slowly unsheathed the Muramasa blade from his side.

“What would happen?” he mused as he ran the blade along the wooden shaft, gently tapping it. He stopped and resheathed the sword and turned his attentions back to a massive holo-board behind him of the Chechyen DMZ.

**

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#3  Edited By joshmightbe

@batkevin74: I loved the Scalphunter bit, I was thinking of making him kind of a pawn in something. He won't even be completely aware of it for a bit tho. I could PM you with the idea if you're interested. If not I'll figure something else out.

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batkevin74

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@batkevin74: I loved the Scalphunter bit, I was thinking of making him kind of a pawn in something. He won't even be completely aware of it for a bit tho. I could PM you with the idea if you're interested. If not I'll figure something else out.

I have something kinda big planned for everyone's favourite killing machine coming up with @time_phantom but PM me, it's fan-fiction we can make things work :)

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TommytheHitman

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Poor guy.

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