Howard and Charles vs The Dimension of Zombies Pt 2

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Posted by wildvine (14888 posts) - - Show Bio

Continued from Howard & Charles vs The Dimension of Zombies Pt 1

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"Rrrrrrrrrrrr" Came another moan from the passenger side of the cab. This one hitting at the glass with its rotten hand, leaving a greasy smear with each thump. The crash seemed to have knocked the guy in the back seat out. Howard could see he was breathing though.

"Rrrrrrrrr" Another zombie started to crawl up over the hood of the taxi. Howard didn't know what had happened, or where they were. All he knew was they needed to get somewhere else. Fast. He tried to start the cab. Rrrarrrrarrra. It made a sound eerily similar to the zombie sounds.

"Come on you piece of sh--" He slammed a hand on the wheel and cranked it again, to no avail.

"Rrrrrrrrrrr" A crack formed on the window one zombie was beating insistently at, like a desperate salesmen.

"We don't want any." Howard told the zombie, and cranked again, risking flooding it. With a sudden start the car came to life. But from the sounds under the hood, it wasn't much more alive then the zombies assaulting it. Howard drove backward, smashing zombies unfortunate to be behind him. The tires briefly spun out, trying to catch purchase on the slimy ground. Howard noticed the fuel gauge needle dropping to E quickly. Apparently the fuel line had been broken during the crash. Or maybe one of the smarter zombies was an undead mechanic. Whatever the case, they weren't going to get far. Howard drove as fast as he dared with the car laboring through a crowded street. Trash and leaves piled up in the gutters and up besides buildings.

It was obvious this version New York City had been going to seed for years. He half expected some super zombie in tattered spandex to jump the taxi, but he only saw more undead regular humans. Crawling through the streets and wandering out of open doorways. Howard parked the taxi on a quiet side street and turned in his seat. He saw no reason to get out. Yet.

"Hey man." He grabbed Charles by the jacket lapels and shook him roughly. "Something happened. We're in a George freaking Romero movie. Wake up!" He slapped the man across the face, but he didn't wake up. "Great. Busted taxi in a zombie world, with an unconscious fare to babysit. This is more crap then a duck should have to deal with." He gave Charles another hard shake, then let him fall back against the back seat.

Howard noticed more undead appearing, drawn by the movement and sounds of the taxi. At the same moment he saw the mans bag on the seat besides him. "I hope you're the packing type." Howard muttered, unzipping the bag. Inside was an ARMOR badge, several pieces of disjointed armoring, and a gun that was too big to be a civilian weapon. "Hello beautiful." Howard breathed, digging into the bag.

* * *

Outside the taxi the hordes of the undead bumped into each other mindlessly as they lurched toward the yellow vehicle, eager to be the first ones there. Word travels fast in a dead city. With no traffic, or cars, or TVs to make noise, zombies from blocks around had heard the hungry moans of their brethren. Not the questing groan that they all issued at all times. No. This was the groan of the hunt. Of pursuit.

The driver side door opened, and Howard stepped out. The guys body armor fit his short body pretty well. The upper body parts anyway. Gripped in his hands was Charles's plasma gun. He climbed on the trunk of his cab to get the high ground and better defend himself and his passenger. It was like ringing the dinner bell and the army of the decaying surged forward. "Alright, you want some fresh duck? Come get some." It was kinda an absurd line, since there was no one around to hear it. It brought a grim smile to Howard's face anyway.

He started firing, and at first it was like zombies in a barrel. Zombies exploding in a spray of mess and gore. More and more they came. Seemingly an army of the dead. "Get your hand off me you damned hairless ape!!" he shook a zombie off his leg before reducing it to cream of zombie soup with a blast. There were too many of them, and the ammo wouldn't last forever. "At least this way I'm spared the chili in the fridge." Howard told no one as the revenant horde closed in. A hand on his shoulder made him spin around and pull the triggor, but it clicked on empty.

"Come on." Charles yelled, pulling Howard towards the roof on the cab.

"Whaaa?" Howard started to ask as he was hurried forward. The two of them landed in the street, and a car just barely stopped short of hitting them. They were back in non zombie overrun New York.

"You saved my life." Charles exclaimed. "How can I thank you?"

"With three hundred dollars in fare. Travelling to alternate realities cost extra." Howard replied without a smile. "Oh, and someone owes me a new taxi."

The End.

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#1 Posted by ImpurestCheese (12542 posts) - - Show Bio

@wildvine Poor Howard. Constantly having to play the hero even when he doesn't want to. Still hopefully ARMOUR will foot the repair bills. Love the George Romero reference and Howard's reference to public enemy number one - Senior Chili from the Fridge.

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#2 Posted by batkevin74 (15451 posts) - - Show Bio

@wildvine: The idea of Howard wearing Portal's helmet, gloves and holding that big 90's gun as he stands on the roof of the taxi is Duke Nukem with a bill! :)

Very nice! Can I do a part 3 to wrap up, something short and sweet?

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#3 Posted by cbishop (15750 posts) - - Show Bio
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#4 Posted by wildvine (14888 posts) - - Show Bio
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#5 Posted by TommytheHitman (6943 posts) - - Show Bio

Well that was a pretty swell adventure!

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#6 Posted by wildvine (14888 posts) - - Show Bio
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#7 Posted by batkevin74 (15451 posts) - - Show Bio
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#8 Edited by 4donkeyjohnson (2023 posts) - - Show Bio

@wildvine: Very good! George A Romero would be proud, also Sam Raimi as it has touches of Evil Dead about it. Poor Portal having to pay for a trip he mostly missed out on

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#10 Posted by wildvine (14888 posts) - - Show Bio