RANKED 1st BY VOTERS IN CHARACTER CREATION CONTEST #35!
| Date | CB 1-Shots | View | Read the... |
|---|---|---|---|
| 10/06/21 | Hot Dogs & Zombies - The Curse of the Windigo! | (Blog) (Forum) | Disclaimer |
| Rating | Rating explanation |
|---|---|
| T | Cannibalism. Ew. Zombieism. Ew. Hot Dogs. Mm, hotdogs. |
Most cultures have some version of zombie lore, but most know the movie zombie: a herky-jerky walk and warning moans that would allow anyone to get away easily. Shambling, emaciated monstrosities that hunger for human brains. Well, I can tell you that the movies are partially right- they hunger for humans, period; not just the brains. They get to be shuffling, decaying monsters if they don't eat often enough. On a steady diet of human flesh though? They look just as human as you or I. How do I know this? Because I, Atsan, am one. Because I know where the zombie came from. It's a curse- the curse of the windigo.
The curse is simply this: you resort to cannibalism, you turn into a windigo- what you know as a zombie. All that mythology crap about thirty foot "ice giants" with red eyes, or comic book white sasquatches? Bull. It's just this: you consume human flesh, you become consumed by the need for more, and more, and more of it. And you'll want more, because for every person you eat, you gain their vitality- their strength... understand? You eat ten men, you gain the strength of ten men.
It's intoxicating. Like any intoxicant though, it doesn't last. It's fleeting. It's also debilitating. That's where the movie zombie comes in. The longer you go without eating, the harder it gets for you to move. You become stiffer and stiffer, and you start to decay, becoming more akin to what you've undoubtedly seen in the movies. Keep eating regularly though, and you keep passing for human, and you can continue to move among them freely. I've been doing that for some time.
You don't believe me? You don't think this could possibly happen without people knowing? They do know. They just have a problem containing it. Because the curse is unknown to most, some have unknowingly spread the problem. Those rumors about the mafia owning hot dog factories where they dispose of unwanted bodies? Truth. So there are an awful lot of people out there that have consumed the evidence for them.
There's something about not knowing though... or maybe it's that the human meat is diluted with animal meats and animal byproducts... but whatever the case, if you don't knowingly eat human flesh, the curse is delayed. You are still consumed with that gnawing emptiness, but not knowing what it is, you chase all of your desires, always wanting more and more and more, and never feeling fulfilled. When you die though, that's when you rise from the dead and become something much more like the movie zombie. Still not knowing what it is you need, and hindered by the rigor mortis from dying, not to mention the embalming fluid replacing your blood, you shamble along in jerks and fits and starts, instinctively looking for the human flesh the curse demands.
I know what you're thinking though: "I call B.S.! Everyone has eaten a hot dog before! How come we don't see more zombies walking around?" Right? Well, that's just the problem, isn't it? Most everyone has eaten a hot dog before, so we have no way of knowing who got the mafia mystery meat that will bring the curse down upon them. Why do you think we use embalming fluid? To preserve bodies? Really? A mixture of solvents is going to preserve a body? You buy that? It's to further hinder the mobility of a resurrected windigo, to make them easier to catch and dispose of. Burial vaults are called "vaults" for a reason. It has nothing to do with "keeping the ground from settling in the graveyard." It's to keep windigo from clawing their way out of the grave. You have no idea how many zombies have spent years upon years beating against their burial vaults, trying to get out.
The problem for the willing cannibal turned windigo is hunting. How do you find that steady supply of human bodies without people growing suspicious? You have to put yourself in the right place. Some of the windigo I know are medical examiners, eating John and Jane Doe. Some are graverobbers, haunting pauper graveyards, or just digging up the freshly buried and replacing the vault (because they do keep the ground from settling, you know). Yes, yes, windigo can eat other windigo to survive. It's not as good, but it does the job. There's other ways too. The homeless. Runaways. Hookers. Gang bangers. Hospitals for the less fortunate. War zones. Being a paid assassin. There's a good one! Get paid to eat others and keep your own life going!
Then there's my favorite, and it's the one I just happened to be able to take advantage of. You become the head of a state run orphanage, contracted out to a corporation like mine. It's the perfect buffet. Unwanted children that birth parents want to forget, and the world generally wants to pretend don't exist. Yes, we have to let some get adopted, but there's so many ways to cover up a meal- "They ran away from the orphanage!" Or "They died in an accident," or "...of a sickness/ sudden illness/ unforseen medical condition." They "get adopted" by phantom paper parents, or best yet- they "age out." Kids that have mostly reached their full growth potential, so have the most meat on them, are still incredibly vital, and having aged past our need to be responsible for them, are "released into the world," and are no longer my concern to account for. Those are the best meals. And they have kept me fed for many years.
The state loves the Atsan Association's Atsan Orphanage and Home For Wayward Children. They think we are very well run, and very efficient. They're encouraging us to expand our operations, becoming a charity with branches all over the country. I think it's a lovely idea. I've suggested that we could help with local homeless shelters too. We've even offered to open halfway houses for paroled convicts. They're very excited to have us participate. The eagerness to take the financial burden off of over-stressed government resources practically comes off of them in waves.
For myself, I can hardly wait to taste what other localities have to offer. I'm positively watering at the mouth, just thinking about it. You, in the meantime... enjoy your hot dog.
| Please let me know what you think, and thanks! -cb | Originally Presented In: CCC #35. |
Story and characters owned by Chris Bishop, copyright 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, 2020, 2021, 2022.
Want to read a non-canon appearance of Atsan? Just cross-over fun: The Walking Dead Prologue: Monsters. :)
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