Fan fiction character creation

Avatar image for ithinkitwasyou
ithinkitwasyou

749

Forum Posts

9769

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 3

User Lists: 3

#1  Edited By ithinkitwasyou

No Caption Provided

 
 
my name's Ryan. I was 12 years old when I realized I was a mutant. Not for any particular life threatening situation. I just went swimming. and I had to sneeze. you ever sneeze under water. Well it feels like your brain exploding in your head. Well not really. But it was at that point I realized I could breath underwater. Nothing spectacular about that right. No giant death Machines, no evil super mutant hostile take over. no Mutant death Camp. Just a pool party. Growing up I was simple for me. I had a single mom, but aside from that life wasn't very hard. I had school. Wasn't very popular but since my mutation wasn't a very obvious one, I never felt the need to tell anyone except my mom, who was really supportive anyways. By the time I was 14 I noticed a change in my voice. i became very persuasive, and I could imitate any sound I heard, so I took up singing. I had fun. I didn't see what was the big deal about being a mutant was, but then again there there were mutants that could do a lot of damage. I wasn't one of them. 
 
Then everything went to hell when I turned 17 years old. I remember waking up feeling sick. Headache and a stomach ache, joint pain, oh and also the fact that I felt like my ribs were gonna split 
I skipped school and tried to sleep it off. When I woke up I had webbed hands. I tried to call my mom for help but the only sound I could produce was the most shrill high pitch annoying vibrado , so sharp and painful even to my own ears that I broke the glass windows and mirrors around me. I tried to calm down, but I was in a state of panic when I tried to get up and my legs gave out from under me. What happened to me? I looked down.
 
My legs had turned into one long whip like tail with a fin at the end of it. My mutation had finally completely developed and it was pretty. I had markings all over my body like a tiger shark, and my skin was changing color from white to blue. 
 
I finally gained a little control over my voice and managed to cry out 
"Mom help!"
 
too be continued.
Avatar image for ithinkitwasyou
ithinkitwasyou

749

Forum Posts

9769

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 3

User Lists: 3

#2  Edited By ithinkitwasyou

aww no comments :(

Avatar image for cbishop
cbishop

16876

Forum Posts

361212

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 75

User Lists: 1092

#3  Edited By cbishop
Avatar image for guardiandevil83
Guardiandevil83

9481

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 0

User Lists: 0

That was cool. I don't know why, but I feel as if stories written in first person have more depth then the 3Rd person. But I can enjoy a good story period. Can't wait to see what happens.

Avatar image for pyrogram
Pyrogram

46452

Forum Posts

13113

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 10

User Lists: 1

Good work man

Avatar image for cbishop
cbishop

16876

Forum Posts

361212

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 75

User Lists: 1092

@pyrogram: @guardiandevil83: Afraid I dredged this up from the back pages and 3 years, 5 months ago. The OP hasn't posted anything in forums in over 8 months. I just liked the pic and story, and thought it was worth a fresh look.

Avatar image for ficopedia
FicOPedia

2662

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 0

User Lists: 229

#7  Edited By FicOPedia
No Caption Provided

This was the pic that was in the OP (now 7 years, 11 months ago) before some CV glitch ate it.

Avatar image for richgenx
RichGenX

1024

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 0

User Lists: 0

This did appear to have some promise. Some basic, beginner typos and grammatical errors, but it does look like a nice start. If the author might do a rewrite of this, I wonder how much better and more developed it might look.

Avatar image for ficopedia
FicOPedia

2662

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 0

User Lists: 229