Authors notes: All characters are property of DC comics. Rated T.
This was originally published for "DC Re-Imagined" but that group died. So I am carrying on the series as an independent.
"Gotham city. My city. Riddled with crime." The dark figure crouched, perched precariously on the edge of the roof, cape fluttering on the warm breeze. "And I'm gonna give crime huge wedgie....of justice!" Lightning flashed momentarily, revealing the figures true features. The muscular, yellow/green body. Green hair, red gloves and tights. And, bizarrely, a red, fur boa. He really shouldn't be out. Jack had an appointment in the morning.
The Creeper stiffened suddenly, head cocked to one side, at the sound of an alarm in the distance. "Sirens? Again?" His voice takes on a crisp, British accent, "I specifically requested a classical waltz for this evening of crime fighting. I shall have words with the Matre D after this. Ha!" He leaped across the open space, to the next roof, leaping towards the sounds of sirens.
* * *
Two years ago....
"The voice is back Doctor Yatz." Jack Ryder said angrily, the moment he stepped into the doctors office. "I thought theses patches were supposed to stop it." Jack looked beat, with dark circles under his eyes, tie loosened, clothes rumpled like he had slept in them. Probably had.
"The patches were designed to open the closed channels of your mind, to help you reconcile with yourself. This voice you keep hearing is you, Mr.Ryder. Not some alien entity. You're not crazy. Its your own repressed desires speaking out. Now, strictly speaking, absence and self-denial can be healthy exercises. But you have to replace them with something. And you're not doing that. You're just bottling it all up inside."
"What do you suggest then? Drum circle? Harmonica? Volunteer at the cat shelter?" Jack asked sarcastically. "I'm a busy journalist. I don't even have time for these sessions."
"If those were things that interested you, I would say go for it." Dr. Yatz sighed.
"Well, lets try hypnosis again." Jack replied impatiently.
"I don't think hypnosis is the way. Last time was..."
"Unproductive." Dr. Yatz finished quickly.
'Did wonders for me. Haha. Ha.' The voice in Jack's mind commented.
"I may not be crazy--"
'Debatable.' The voice interjected.
"--yet. But I'm stressed to the max. I need a fix, not pop psychology." He paced nervously, rubbing his temples with two fingers.
"There is a new drug trial I may be able to get you into. But you have to understand the risks of testing new drugs. There are always side effects."
'Side effects may include, rash, hives, baldness, blindness, paralysis, scurvy, tooth decay, madness, death, and in very rare cases, dry mouth. Don't take if you're pregnant, or wish to become pregnant. Please consult your mortician before taking this medication.' The voice chuckled in his mind.
"How soon can you get me into that trial?" Jack asked, running a nervous hand through his hair.
* * *
A few days later....
"Nothing to worry about Mr Ryder. Two of the three people who tried this drug experienced absolutely no side effects." The kid looked way too young to be a doctor, in Jack's opinion.
'That didn't slow Doogie Howser down.' The voice giggled.
"And, uh, the third trial user?"
"Brain aneurysm. Though we're sure it wasn't caused by the drug." He replied in a reassuring tone of voice. "Frankly, Mr Ryder, you are the best candidate for this drug yet." He swabbed Jack's are with a dab of alcohol, and the spot goes cold. "This will pinch a bit, Mr Ryder." Despite his youthful appearance, the doctor is experienced with a needle, and Jack barely felt the needle go in.
"Stop!" Dr. Yatz yelled, banging into the room. "That's the....rejuvenator..." He saw it was already to late.
'What?' Jack had time to wonder, before the room went black.
* * *
Dr Yatz, and the assistant doctor back away slowly as Jack changed, growing out of himself, somehow. Greenish yellow skin tearing through his clothing. The thing quickly leaped to its feet.
"Hey hey hey, how is everybody? Its great to be here. I just flew in from the subconscious and boy are my arms tired." He stretched his arms theatrically. The two doctors just stare, unsure what to say.
"Who are you." Dr. Yatz asked, finally.
"Who me? Oh I'm Jack's---Blah blah blah, boring exposition. Call me Creep. No, Creeper, YES!! No, Clarice? No wait, what was your suggestion again?" He pointed at the assistant, who shook his head. "Creeper it is then." He shook Dr Yatz's hand vigorously up and down.
"Mr Creeper--" Dr Yatz began,
"Please, Mr Creeper was my father. Haha! Ha!" Both doctors covered their ears, to block out the pain enducing laughter. "Well, I've had a lovely time. You must come to my clinic sometime for tea and cookies. Or maybe a lobotomy? Meep-meep!" He made the roadrunner sound, and leaped out the second story window with a crash.
"We've got to call secur-ahhhh!" Thud! The doctors tripped as he tried to walk to the phone, his shoelaces had been tied together.
"Let him go." Dr Yatz replied quietly. "We don't need that...Creeper....being traced back to us."
* * *
Gotham First National Bank,
Three cop cars face the front entrance of the bank, parked in a semi-circle. Officers crouch behind open car doors, guns drawn. "Freaks wearing some kinda body armor." A cop grunted half to himself, half to his partner. "Remember the days when crooks were dumb, and crimes were ill planned? Now'a days there's a boss behind every job, and every boss these days has a mask and a theme. Clowns or axes or whatever. This city is going to hell." He grumbled.
As if on cue, the Creeper somersaulted from a nearby alleyway, onto the hood of the center cop car. "Knock knock." He grinned.
"Get off the car freak." The officer replied, and pointed his gun at the Creeper.
"Close. Actually your line was, ahem, 'Whose there?" He giggled. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have dinner reservations." He back flipped away, and slammed through the front door. "Avon calling!" All the bank employees have been webbed to the walls, or floor with green stuff. Another employee was being webbed up by a big green bug-thing.
"Ah, a strapping -tch tch- new convert. You will make a fine drone in my -tch tch- army." His large mandibles clicked together as when he talked, then he spit a yellowish goo at the Creeper.
"That's what she said. Ha!" Creeper said, and leaped over the stream of stuff. The bug man jumped like a grasshopper, and drove a clawed foot into Creepers stomach.
"When I turn -tch tch- you, you will be my -tch tch- personal body guard." The Hellgrammite gurgled, and stomped on Creepers chest.
"Why" Creeper turned quickly to one side, avoiding another spray of goop, and leaped to his feet.
"When I turn you, you won't -tch tch- ask why. You'll be a perfect, loyal -tch- drone." He swiped a kick at Creepers face.
"Why?" Creeper asked as he jumped over Hellgrammite, and swatted him on the backside.
"Because you will -tch- be changed from this rediculous body, into a -tch- perfect insect form."
"STOP ASKING WHY!!" He roared.
"Why?" Creeper slammed a fist into Hellgrammite's abdomen. And then uppercut the creature in the chin. "Aaaaand he is down for the count. Definitely gonna feel that tomorrow." Creeper said in his sports announcer voice. Then in a different voice, "I think he's feeling it right now. Haha. Ha! Goodnight everybody, Creeper has left the building." He drug the unconscious Hellgrammite behind him, down the steps, and tossed him on the cop car hood. "The clock store is safe. No thanks necessary."
"Get out of here, before I arrest you too." The cop growled.
"What's that? An autograph? I'm afraid there's no time for that son, but remember, only you can prevent forest fires.Ah haha" He saluted, and bound away into the shadows.
* * *
The next day....
"Right this way Mr. Ryder. Ms Quinzel is a bit...odd. But she has been a model patient, and we don't foresee any problems concerning her release." The large nurse prattled on, as Jack nodded, and pretended to listen.
'Babysitting is for people without cushions.' The Creeper grumbled in Jack's mind.
"Here we are." They stopped at a cell, exactly like every other one they had passed. Jack looked around while the nurse had a minor exchange with the girl, who replied in french.
"This here's Mr. Jack Ryder, AKA the Creeper. He's your new keeper." The nurse said, as she stepped out of her cell. She was small built, and sheet white. But she had huge blue eyes.
'Aaaaooooogaaaaa!!' The Creeper commented, apparently changing his mind about this job.
"The Creepahs my keepah." She giggled girlishly, and the Creeper did a cartoon wolf howl.
"Nice to meet you." He said, and she accepted his offered hand.
"Oh, I'm sure the pleasure's all mine." She smiled.
To be continued in DC Now: The worlds finest.