Crusaders of the Lost Fan Fic #4 Technically Advancing the Plot

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wildvine

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<< Previously <<// >> Next >>

Hm-hm-hm I love being in darkness with zero stimulations la-la-la! No need for expositions!

Nate: "Or the mystery door located at the back of this cave? Or how I'm going to blow it up with dynamite?"

I beg your pardon.

Nate: "Wow, a mystery voice from behind the mystery door! Way to keep to a theme."

Okay hang on. I think we flashed-back too far here. This is like the start of this adventure. Narratively speaking of course.

Nate: "Hey, is it cool if I like, explode this door? Cause I've already set the dynamite."

That's probably for the best. We don't want to engineer a confusing story paradox, and this flashback has deviated far enough as is. Actually, let's just jump into the present, shall we?

"Somehow I always knew it would end this way." Nate commented rather cheerfully given his predicament. He and his sister were tied spread eagle by their arms and legs. One of the many optimal positions for human sacrifice. or so I've been told.

"Where THE HELL have you been you useless blabbering WINDSOCK!" Natalie shrieked, much less cheerfully.

First of all, rude. And second of all, shut your assorted traps. I need to set the scene...

"Can you not mention me being shirtless or whatever?" Nate asked.

Sure, Champ. I think I can manage that.

"It's not because I'm pale." Nate helpfully added. Though for the record he was a rather corpse-like shade of pasty.

"You know what the scene needs? A couple swords and, just a thought here, maybe cut us down or something!" Natalie snarled.

"Is she always this acrimonious?" Artaxes wondered aloud. "Does she realize how off putting it is?" At the appearance of a large talking lion, the monkeys had done what most individuals with a zest for life do at the appearance of a lion. For the third time today, the remaining monkeys scattered to the four winds.

"Ayyyyyy!" A voice bellowed through the forest, making the trees shake and the monkeys to freeze mid-panic. An enormous six-foot-tall rat with red eyes, a mean sneer and a meaner case of hunchback, stomped into the clearing. "Where is the freaking tractor and who approved the human sacrifice? Is that in the budget?" His beady red eyes focused on Artaxes then. "You-"

Artaxes took a mighty leap forward then, slashing his claws lightening quick at the Dragon siblings as he flew past, then he slammed hard into the rat and the two of them rolled into the bushes.

"What about-" Natalie started to ask as her and Nate's bondage basically disintegrated, the two dropping to the ground. Natalie landed easily on her feet; Nate landed just as easily on his face. "Alright. We are done with this quest." She huffed, retrieving her machetes from the monkey pile of swag, along with as much gold as she could cram into her pockets.

Um, you're welcome by the way. Saved your useless lives and all that...

"Yes! We now begin the quest for my new sword!" Nate added energetically.

"Stupid Nate. Stupid questline. Stupid monkeys..." Natalie hissed and she cut the farmer free.

"Thank you, kindly strangers. Eh, I think?" Farmer Brown offered, actually seeming less confused than normal, based on the period of time we've known him. "Could you help an old man retrieve his stolen apples-"

"Oh my gosh a new quest!" And with that infectious enthusiasm our two brave-

"NOPE. Come on, idiots." Natalie grabbed her brother by the ear and dragged him into the next scene.

Meanwhile, however...

"These actions you have taken do not meet with our agreement, Greg." Artaxes growled, his paw on the rat's throat, pinning the boss monster to the ground.

"Monkeys are... krrrk... a handful... agggg... to control." The monster Greg choked out.

"The actions of the servant always reflect on the master." Artaxes replied, pulling back and letting the rat catch his breath. "I told you to get me the tractor, and instead your goons played on it like a toy. Your incompetence could have jeopardized everything, if I had not miscalculated events." The lion took this time to rake his claws down a tree, leaving deep gouges in the wood.

"Miscalculating events sounds like a fancy way to say you messed up too." Greg snickered, rubbing his sore throat.

"The tractor was touched by the power, but it is unstable. Not usable for my purposes. The boy now," he paused. "The Power draws him. I saw it with the Power Grid Goggles. I wonder what a special hero in-training like him would do with The Power?"

"So, let's not let the brat wander off." Greg replied, starting to turn away.

"Oh, I'll be monitoring the lad, no worries about that. Unfortunately for you this is the end of our partnership." Artaxes popped out his freshly sharpened claws. "No loose ends and all that."

"YOU DIRTY RAT!" Greg screamed as the lion pounced.

Back with the terrible twosome.

The Dusty Incline lived up to its name. It was both dusty and incline-y.

"Truth in advertising." Nate commented.

"From now on I am the quest taker. The mountain us a dangerous place, there may be some choice treasure. probably not great quests. let's just focus on making distance and slaying rich looking monsters."

Hm? Oh, is it time for the ending...? Right. Um. Ah. Having escaped a certain and messy (if not annoying) death at the hand of monkey bandits, the two heroes and their narrator who totally saved their sorry bottoms, began the trek up the Dusty Incline, where they probably meet quirky characters and maybe that lion dude comes back.

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#2 wildvine  Moderator

#2 for the 52 in '22 writing marathon

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@wildvine: Obligatory reader comment here. ;)

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#4 wildvine  Moderator

@cbishop: Compulsory acknowledging response present

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#5  Edited By cbishop