Creative Story Ideas

This isn't actually Fan-Fic, so this might be the wrong board.

I just had this idea for a story that I wanted to share. It's not elaborate or anything, and it could even be something that's already been done, so feedback is appreciated. If someone feels that they could work with the idea, feel free to do so. It is about a story that begins with a trial to decide if the protagonist is actually worthy to hold that title. It is meant to be humorous and tell the story in piecemeal but nothing too confusing. I may have included too many jokes right off the bat, so feel free to mention things you think should be cutback. It's a bit much to read, so bear with me.

This is how a possible intro could go:

“Order! Order in the court of public opinion!” bellowed honourable Judge Walter Sanderson, who was thrilled to be the first character introduced in this story almost as much as being a paragon of righteous justice. (Description of Sanderson). The court was filled somewhere between a Nickelback concert and a game between the teams ranked 8^th and 9^th in Women’s Basketball. The prosecutor sat prim and proper, bristling with energy at the thought of another life to be ruined. The defendant, who is our protagonist for this story (for now anyway) kept his mind blank so as not to leave an awful first impression even before he is introduced. “The prosecution may introduce its case,” declared Sanders, and the prosecutor arose and cleared his throat to begin his speech.

“Your honour, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, readers, literary award evaluators and those of similar reading capacity as Helen Keller (orFloyd Mayweather if a more current example would serve). We are gathered here today to make a decision of the utmost importance. The result of this decision will determine if this book will be included among the greats, Tolkien, Dickens, Tolstoy, your favourite author, Meyers……er, maybe not Meyers…or if it will convince you that reading is a dying art and you are better off waiting for virtual reality to be actualized 10 years from now. We must decide if this here fictional character, Tender Bulger is fit to be the protagonist of this story. If you are looking for the hearing on whether ‘Tender Bulger’ is the worst name ever for a protagonist, that was yesterday, and it was decided that there is a strong case for that claim…in the English language anyway. He is so utterly forgettable, that the hero from the last C action movie you watched is at least 42 times more memorable. No doubt some of you readers don’t even remember watching any movie. It was that forgettable and we do not want this story to share the same fate. He is so utterly devoid of skill, he would get last place at a Stormtrooper marksmanship contest, lose a wrestling match to the Pillsbury Doughboy and orate worse than Sylvester Stallone’s Rocky trying to speak Cantonese. These are qualities of the comic relief, not the protagonist.

“It is my sincere hope to convince you my peers, my betters and my inferiors that just about any other character would make a better protagonist. Elsa Cunnings who is the first casualty of this story (so don’t get too attached) would make a better one. Scatty, who is my personal and sure to be some of your personal favourite character is sure to be a better fit. Even Randal Sterling who is a concept character that never made it past the author’s unconscious musings during a night of heavy drinking and existential crisis would serve the role better.”

“Does the defendant have anything to say for himself?” to end this intro.

Prosecutor’s side: Antagonist (of course, seeing as whom he chooses to do battle with reflects on his own character), one of the pre-publishing readers who thinks he can do better, and a liaison of the Catholic Church who questions the morality of the protagonist’s actions.

Defendant’s side: Creative writing teacher who hopes to get a smidgen of fame from his student’s work, Bob, a random citizen the protagonist saves who will die otherwise and a furry who is hoping for some action between the protagonist and an anthropomorphic animal of the R-rated kind.

The trial serves as background for the story action, a sort of running commentary on the things that take place with frequent interjections by the prosecutor questioning the protag’s choices, the protagonist second guessing himself about what kind of literary hero he wants to be, etc.

This is an interesting concept, in that it is simply outlandish. A public hearing to try the validity of a protagonist for a fictional story? Truly zany stuff.

I would expand upon why this choice of protagonist has garnered such a great amount of public controversy, besides the questionable memorability of their persona. As a public court case is typically a high tension environment, I would expect the protagonist to find themselves at the epicenter of some overblown drama or moral dilemma.

On a critical note, I would better structure the speeches of this piece. They are on the verge of becoming orated walls of text; I believe you forgot to close off the speech marks of the second paragraph, which indicates that you yourself may have become a little lost within the size of the speech you wrote.

In terms of solutions, you should add some situationally descriptive text to break up large portions of speech. For instance, you could describe the current emotions and expressions of the defendant and prosecution, and add some descriptions about the atmosphere of the courtroom etc. This will really help with the readability of your story.

Overall, I'm interested to see where you'll go with this, and if you give this introduction some more depth, I would definitely read and potentially help expand your idea.