A New Threat:A Superman One Shot

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mrdecepticonleader

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The sun shone brightly and the sky was blue,the birds twittered and all was calm in the city of Metropolis.

All of a sudden something began to descend from the sky it hurtled towards the square,people looked up in astonishment, curiosity and fear.The meteor like object picked up more and more speed as it got closer and closer to the ground.People began to scream in terror and run for their lives.

The object landed with a loud thud.Cracks erupted from the road and a powerful shock wave spread out breaking nearby windows.

The smoke cleared a heavily damaged Kal El picked himself up.He coughed,and coughed again,blood dropped out of his mouth and onto the ground.He stayed calm and looked around.

He tired to use his x ray vision but he couldn't.

His eye sight was blurred

He tried to use his sonic hearing.

A ringing sound came from his ears.

He closed his eyes and tried to concentrate.

HMMMM

A strange sound filled the air.

A glow was emitted.

Both the sound and the glow got ever so closer to Superman. Something hit him it was nothing like what he had been hit with before,he was sent into the air again and came crashing back down.

"Heh heh"

"Ha ha"

"Ha ha ha ha ah ha ha ah ha ha ha ha"

A metallic laugh pierced the air.

"So you are the last one,the one...how....pitiful" the voice rasped.

Superman turned to see who his aggressor was but there was no one there. As he stumbled to get back up something hit him from behind.And then again in the face,some of his teeth came from his mouth.Blood poured from his mouth.

He tried to get to his feat,dazed beaten and broken.

Something griped his throat and lifted him from the ground.Blue energy flashed and a figure stood there holding the Kryptonian.

He was wearing a black hood and a cloak with dark armour.

"Wh who are you?" spluttered Superman

"I go by many names but for you,you can call me The End" he replied as his eyes glowed red.

He formed his hand into a long blade and raised it.

"Goodbye last son of Krypton".

Disclaimer Superman and things associated with him belong to DC Comics.The character The End is one I came up with.I was going to enter something like this for a competition onhere but I thought I would finish it and post it.So tell me what you think.

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batkevin74

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#2  Edited By batkevin74

@mrdecepticonleader said:

He tired to use his x ray vision but he couldn't.

His eye sight was blurred

Tried and eyesight is what you should have. A few minor grammatical/spacing errors eg: "closer to its descent.People began to scream"

Now asides from formating nitpicky things, storywise: Very good, cliffhanger teaser ending, but just a bit too short. Is The End magical, technological, alien, human...these questions unanswered, annoyingly at the moment unanswered. So I'll need some more please :)

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mrdecepticonleader

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@batkevin74 said:

@mrdecepticonleader said:

He tired to use his x ray vision but he couldn't.

His eye sight was blurred

Tried and eyesight is what you should have. A few minor grammatical/spacing errors eg: "closer to its descent.People began to scream"

Now asides from formating nitpicky things, storywise: Very good, cliffhanger teaser ending, but just a bit too short. Is The End magical, technological, alien, human...these questions unanswered, annoyingly at the moment unanswered. So I'll need some more please :)

Okay I will have a read through and correct things.I was tired as I typed this up so that is why.

As for more maybe but for now its just this.

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Project_Worm

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#4  Edited By Project_Worm

@mrdecepticonleader: Pretty interesting. Keep it up!

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mrdecepticonleader

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@Project_Worm said:

@mrdecepticonleader: Pretty interesting. Keep it up!

Thanks

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lykopis

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#6  Edited By lykopis

You can call me The End.

Very cool and awesome ending. I like this, as is. A little snippet about the end of Superman.

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#7  Edited By cbishop

@mrdecepticonleader: I think you should have entered the contest. ;)

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mrdecepticonleader

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@lykopis said:

You can call me The End.

Very cool and awesome ending. I like this, as is. A little snippet about the end of Superman.

Thanks

@cbishop said:

@mrdecepticonleader: I think you should have entered the contest. ;)

Well if there is still time to enter consider me in :)

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cbishop

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#9  Edited By cbishop

@mrdecepticonleader said:

@cbishop said:

@mrdecepticonleader: I think you should have entered the contest. ;)

Well if there is still time to enter consider me in :)

Unfortunately, no. The contest is done - batkevin74 won. I do like your story though.

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mrdecepticonleader

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@cbishop said:

@mrdecepticonleader said:

@cbishop said:

@mrdecepticonleader: I think you should have entered the contest. ;)

Well if there is still time to enter consider me in :)

Unfortunately, no. The contest is done - batkevin74 won. I do like your story though.

Ah well.Thanks.

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wildvine

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#11  Edited By wildvine

Nicely done. Though i agree, it was short. And i would like to know more about The End.

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mrdecepticonleader

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@wildvine said:

Nicely done. Though i agree, it was short. And i would like to know more about The End.

Thanks well I may write more about em in the future

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#13  Edited By cbishop

@mrdecepticonleader: no problem.

@wildvine: She lives! :D (just saying hi)