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#1 Edited by wildvine (14882 posts) - - Show Bio

Anyone interested can read the full thing and the current chapters beyond this --> here <--

Previous chapters [1-1][1-2]

The Crown of Destiny [1-3]

Dark Lands. Bowser’s Castle, throne room

The king of koopas was busy entertaining his precocious only child. Only birth child, that is. He had long since adopted the koopalings, back when he believed he would never have a true heir, but here was it was, his own little miracle, whom he loved so much as to name after himself. A not-so subtle declaration of the line of succession. Junior was sitting on the arm of the throne as his father spun stories of his past adventures, some real, some made up on the spot.

“But how did you get the blargg to live in the castle lava traps?” Junior asked leaning back too far and starting to fall with a startled squeak. Bowser scooped his hand behind Junior’s shell and lifted him back to his perch like nothing.

“I wrestled them out of their lava pools, and when they refused to serve me I tickled them into submission!” Bowser declared with a wicked grin. “Oh, you don’t believe your old man?” He continued as Jr looked rather doubtful. “Let me demonstrate!” He gave a mock roar and began teasing Junior’s side, almost causing Junior to fall again as he giggled. They were interrupted by a blue-shelled koopa aid silently signaling for Bower’s attention.

“My lord.” He said when he caught the kings eyes. “Its Shadow Guy.”

Bowser sighed. “Say, Champ, why don’t you go practice your fire breathing for a while?” He said, gently setting his son on the carpeted stone floor.

“Aw Pops. I already did it todayyyyyy.” Junior grumbled, crossing his arms across his bib. He sensed something interesting was about to happen and he didn’t want to miss it. Pom Pom the nanny mentally prepared herself for a troublesome afternoon with a cranky Junior.

“Well,” Bowser scratched his chin thoughtfully “Why don’t you go play your video game... thing. You conquered that yet?”

“Naw, you keep limiting my play time.” Junior replied with less of a pout now.

“How would you like some extra play time today? Think you can beat the game for daddy?” He poked Junior in the side again, teasing a smile from the boy now.

“Oh I don’t know if more games would be good for him--” Pom Pom started to say, before Junior ran past her.

“Pops said I can play more!” He hollered over his shoulder before Bowser could have his mind changed. Not that that was ever going to happen anyway.

“I’ll keep him occupied my lord.” Pom Pom bowed and left the way Junior had fled, though Bowser barely noticed, having already dismissed her.

Shadow Guy approached the throne like, well, a shadow. “Report.” Bowser grunted. “This better be something important or I’m deep frying that toad and eating it, then you for dessert.” If the threat frightened Shadow Guy he didn’t show it. Really unlike a shy guy if you thought about it, but Bowser was not one for deep contemplations. That’s why he had advisors.

“My sources say the princess has a new weapon. A magic crown. Potentially devastating in nature, especially if it was used against the Mushroom Kingdom. Such a device existing outside of your control is abominable, my lord. The powerless grasping to pull the strings of destiny from your iron grip, but with...” he went on at some length in that pseudo-poetic dialogue before finally pausing for dramatic effect.

“Get it for me.” Bowser cut-in before Shadow Guy could launch into afresh diatribe. “BRING IT BEFORE THE-- oh. He’s gone. Hm.” Bowser usually had to yell at his goons to get them into motion.

“You yelled, lordship?” Kammy the magikoopa asked as she phased through the wall. She had been waiting on Bowser since he was a new baby, then took a parental role over the koopalings. Now she divided her servitude between father and son.

“A new power item was discovered in the Mushroom Kingdom. A crown or something. I sent Shadow Guy to fetch it for me.”

“A crown powerup….” Kammy mused aloud. Something about it sounded vaguely familiar. “Let me go check the archives…” She phased through the floor still talking to herself and leaving Bowser to his own thoughts.

Back at Peach’s Castle

Night had fallen and the princess was ready to call it as just that; however, she decided to take a detour to the treasury instead. The crown was locked in a wooden chest with a few other odds and ends of low import, but important enough to be stored as treasure. It didn’t look particularly special or dangerous, however appearances could be most deceiving. The mystery surrounding it and its power was as important as the havoc it could wreck, if Professor Gadd’s suggestion was to be believed. Her ethics wouldn’t allow her to test the magic of the crown on other people, but she still suffered from burning curiosity.

Feeling foolish in spite of herself, she lifted the crown and placed it on her head. There was a quick tingle throughout her body, but nothing more. She didn’t know what precisely she expected to happen, but it was probably a dumb idea to be playing with it like this. She suddenly felt self-conscious, as if she was not alone in the treasury. She quickly removed the crown and walked briskly out of the room, slamming the door behind her. “What are you skittish about?” She scolded herself, her hackles still raised for whatever reason. Hating herself but unable to calm herself down, she pulled her robe tighter around her body and hurried to her private quarters. If she had bothered to look back she might have seen a shadow slither from the treasury room, and down the hall towards an open window.

Bowser’s Castle

The crown sat tiny on Bowser’s massive palm. It looked more like a childs toy than any type of weapon. How could this turn any battle? Why was the princess afraid someone would get it? There was only one way to find out. Similar to Peach, Bowser was afraid to test it on anyone, only out of fear they might become more powerful than him as opposed to ethics. Further mirroring Peach’s actions earlier, Bowser slowly placed the crown on his head. The effect was nearly instantaneous. Bowser’s body was racked with pain so great he couldn’t even gasp out, the exact changes happening to him were hidden by blinding light, forcing Shadow Guy to look away.

As the light faded away the biological alterations became more apparent. His red mane had become flowing golden locks, and his burning crimson eyes changed to cool dazzling azure. His dry scales had melted into perfect pale skin, his flat, armored chest had become curvaceously full, his sides narrowed at his flat stomach, his stubby legs were long and toned now. Bowser had taken on the form of a peak female human. Some aspects of his monstrous nature would not be subdued, however. His proud horns remained, along with an altered, longer tail and a reduced shell size. His spiked armbands had interestingly changed to fit his new size. Unfortunately those were the only stitches of clothing on his body. Rising shakily to his feet, Bowser took in his alterations with confusion and wonder. “What--” he started to say, shocked by the sound of his feminine voice before he tried again. “What the hell have you done to me?” Shadow Guy had wisely chosen to ninja-vanish from the castle. “What kind of power is this?” Bowser asked himself.

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#2 Posted by batkevin74 (15372 posts) - - Show Bio

@wildvine: This is very entertaining, despite me only knowing the barest bits of Nintendo-land

1) The king of koopas. Capitals?

2) “Report.” Bowser grunted. Exclamation point?

3) “What the hell have you done to me?” Shadow Guy had wisely chosen to ninja-vanish from the castle. “What kind of power is this?” Bowser asked himself. Maybe breaking that apart from the paragraph

eg: “What the hell have you done to me?” Shadow Guy had wisely chosen to ninja-vanish from the castle.

“What kind of power is this?” Bowser asked himself.

My only real points are potential grammar and punctuation, which may or may not be correct at all. The story is great. More would be good :)

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#3 Posted by wildvine (14882 posts) - - Show Bio


Good notes on all chapters. You would think three edits would be enough but I am clearly rusted. I have two more full chapters already posted at the site. Chapter 4 is underway

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#4 Posted by batkevin74 (15372 posts) - - Show Bio