I awoke with a start one night, seemingly after I had just drifted off, but according to the clock I had slept a few hours. Being found in such a deep sleep, I wondered (as anyone would) what had awakened me. Then I heard it. A dull thump in the house, like something being dropped on a carpet.
As you would imagine I was curious, though not afraid. Not yet. I thought perhaps it was the house settling, or some animal under the house. Something along those lines. But it came again, a dull thump I almost felt in my bones. It was then I decided to get up and investigate this noise, disturbing my sleep. I walked down the hall, pausing at each door to listen, but now all was quiet. I began to think I had been half asleep and dreaming, when i heard the sound again.
It sounded vaguely familiar now, and I was sure I had heard it before somewhere, but I couldn't place the sound. The sound had originated from the kitchen, and now as I approached the door I saw an otherworldly light shinning beneath the door crack, and a strange shadow moving about. Then the light disappeared with another of those thumps, making my heart skip a few beats.
Suddenly the light flared up again, and I knew I couldn't lurk outside my own kitchen all night. Slowly I eased the door open, and saw a hideous form hunched over my kitchen counter. It's fur was missing huge patches. It's skin was scabby and raw looking. It's spine protruded from it's back flesh. It's head looked like a rotted pigs head. It turned around, probably to close my 'fridge door, the pale, sickly light giving me more of a look at it then I wanted. It opened it's gnarly snout, and asked a question I will never forget.
"Do you want a sandwich?" It rasped in a half choked voice.