You run the animal gauntlet

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skywalker95

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#1  Edited By skywalker95

- You are armed with a machete and wearing a hockey armour and mask

- You are facing 1 animal

- Takes place in an open field

- Bloodusted

- You are fully healed after each round

- Start 20 ft apart

- Win by death

  1. Warthog
  2. German Shepard Dog
  3. Baboon
  4. Wolf
  5. Hyena
  6. Lion
  7. Silverback Gorilla
  8. Grizzly Bear
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TOPAZZZ

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#2  Edited By TOPAZZZ

I stop at 1

I’m not competent enough to fight any animal with horns/tusks and warthogs are hilariously faster than me.

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ElSebbe

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#3  Edited By ElSebbe

Out of order. Most humans stop at 1.

EDIT: Oh we have weapons. Stops at 6

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PrinceX

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i stop at 6.

some of the strongest humans stop at 8.

noone clear i think

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Noobmaster2001

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#6 Noobmaster2001  Online

I clear this easy, 1-5 are fodder and i have feats to suggest i could one shot a Silverback Gorilla and a Grizzly Bear.

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green_skaar

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People stop at 1.

Warthogs are extremely dangerous and even the big cats aren't always successful against them.

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ElSebbe

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TheOneWhoKnocks

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I stop at 6, anyone reasonably fit could get that far. Warthogs are being overestimated. They're just fast, not as strong as European boars. No one could clear this, unless the got insanely lucky.

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kalkent

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@princex said:

i stop at 6.

some of the strongest humans stop at 8.

noone clear i think

No human is taking on a determined silverback, even with a machete.

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deactivated-5e72183304ce6

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I stop at one

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green_skaar

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And big cats have claws and fangs. Warthogs hides are extremely thick, you'd be lucky to get one swing in before it's too close goring and biting you, making swinging worthless.

@elsebbe said:

@green_skaar: Humans have a machete.

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ElSebbe

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@green_skaar: Unless someone is like 400 lbs, the average human will be able to dodge it from 20 feet. A good hit will make it bleed or 1 shot it.

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hopz7

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The German Shepard is the only animal here that most people would beat. Some could kill the warthog, but that’s probably about it without a lot of luck involved. This also really depends on whether the animals are bloodlusted as well. If a normal baboon went in and got cut by the machete, it would likely retreat and you could hunt and kill it. If the baboon is bloodlusted, it’s superior strength, speed and agility will give it the win even if it dies as well. Same goes for the wolf and hyena. No human can beat a healthy lion, silverback or grizzly with just a machete. Even with insane luck, you will lose. Even throwing the machete right into the heart of one of those animals as they are charging at you will still give them time to kill you before bleeding out. And once thrown, you now have nothing to use to defend yourself.

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iDevos

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@hopz7: Fool you think a baboon has superior strength than a man? Probably one of those people who think chimpanzees are super soldiers based on old inaccurate studies.

No one is getting past 6 if they luckily get past 5. Lol at the boy who said hyena were fodder

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Token1300

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#16  Edited By Token1300

When I was in high school my time was 5:06 for 1 long mile Runs so add that with top speed that’s 12 mph. Still very short of a Warthhog which run 30 mph in short bursts. But I heard Warthog’s are one directional attackers, so I just easily dodge since I’m a Rusty Brown Belt and have experience dodging close attacks, and just machete frenzy the poor pig before it reacts.

At 2 im confident I could take out a Dog with a weapon like machete. Most adult humans can take out dogs with a weapon. 2 neck chops n it’s over, with a bite mark or 2.

At 3 I heard baboons were vicious Nd I’ve watched videos, so I would have not even take any chances with running away or turning my back. Instead wen I get close I would wrestle with the baboon and eventually stab it in the eye or face because I know the first thing it will do is try to rip or bite my face.

At 4 there’s no way I would stand a chance against a Full Grown Bloodlusted Wolf. I Would have to be smoking to seriously think I stood a chance after 3. Wolvescan be intimidated but Bloodlusted and standing it’s geound ? These things are heavier, faster, and stronger than German Shepard’s by far. I’m screwed. A machete isn’t enough the wolf would be too fast. N I would have zero chance of running away.

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TakenStew22

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I probably stop at 4. Wolf's are pretty damn tough dogs.

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Namebk

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#18  Edited By Namebk

Get stomped at 6.

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WaitOmegaStorm

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#19  Edited By WaitOmegaStorm

I get a Stomps from Warthog

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Karkus

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I clear this easy, 1-5 are fodder and i have feats to suggest i could one shot a Silverback Gorilla and a Grizzly Bear.

Scans or bust.

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Noobmaster2001

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@karkus: Well it was....off panel...but its definitely not..PIS or anything.Im totally high tier.

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hopz7

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@idevos: Fool? So apparently you concede and that’s why you throw insults? Some men are stronger than a baboon. The average human (including women and men), are not. The average human barely exercises. And no, chimps are not super soldiers. But a bloodlusted chimp would fodderize nearly any human. That doesn’t make them super soldiers. They are just more savage than most humans could deal with. It’s also an opponent no human trains to fight. Their fighting style is unlike anything you could predict because it would essentially be random. That doesn’t make them super soldiers. We have tools that allow us to easily deal with any other animal on the planet. Most animals won’t engage humans in combat anyways. And when an animal feels threatened, they are more often than not looking to escape even if they could win the battle. For animals, surviving to fight another day typically trumps a random act of violence. There are always easier meals waiting. Hence why I said that this really depends on whether the animals are bloodlusted or just acting like regular animals. Either way, the average human wouldn’t get past round 1 since the average human is an out of shape pussy with no combat experience. Animals fight and kill far more often than the average human. Keep the insults coming though. Makes you look like a great debater.

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Donotdenyyourfate

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warthog blitzes me and i die

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skywalker95

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MuratDemir

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#25  Edited By MuratDemir

I clear all rounds. I got some hand-to-hand combat training. But I can lift around 300kg, and I am very durable & agile. Almost all of them are snack for me, though the bear one is a bit hard. I will not be able to outrun it, so I gotta use my agility for this. There are no objects around, so I am in a disadvantage. But yeah, I got this 10/10.

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D2therJ

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maybe clear 1 because it's just 1, and not 30-50 feral hogs.

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Eri_Joni

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SwordofDamocles

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#28  Edited By SwordofDamocles

I clear all round, I will have probably troubles puting down the Gorilla, being honest.

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Bearderby

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#29  Edited By Bearderby

I stop at 6

nobody clears unless you're a supersoldier like Captain America

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Beyond_Dreams

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Nobody gets past a lion even with a machete. Before you know it you will have a 200 kilogram predator on you that just bite your neck

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Tzimiscelord

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Stop at 6, most probably.

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Reap_ii

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Anyone saying they clear=complete idiot or maybe just trolls

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ThousandSteps

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#33  Edited By ThousandSteps

I’m only beating the GS, baboon and the hyena. The warthog and wolf kills me more often than not, the lion straight up mauls me and lol at anyone beating a silverback or bear, that’s just being delusional.

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deactivated-5edaa8b959055

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I don't think anyone gets past a Silverback

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green_skaar

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1 shotting a bloodlusted warthog with 1 machette swing...

No Caption Provided

@elsebbe said:

@green_skaar: Unless someone is like 400 lbs, the average human will be able to dodge it from 20 feet. A good hit will make it bleed or 1 shot it.

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EternalDarkFury

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Stop at 6. Might even stop at 5. Hyenas are tough little freakers.

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ElSebbe

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Loading Video...

It's game over for the Hog.

1 shotting a bloodlusted warthog with 1 machette swing...

No Caption Provided
@elsebbe said:

@green_skaar: Unless someone is like 400 lbs, the average human will be able to dodge it from 20 feet. A good hit will make it bleed or 1 shot it.

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Kidolio

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I stop at 4 I’m like 5’4

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Matthew660

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No one is making it past 6 unless they have an assault rifle.

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Hatemetomorrow

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#40  Edited By Hatemetomorrow

I stop at 6 realistically unless I get extremely lucky. But I highy doubt it. Also is it a male or female lion only asking because of the mane.but I also think the gorilla should be 6 only because I see a charging gorilla being easier to get that lucky head shot on.

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WolverineBatmanFTW

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I stop at 2 because i couldn't bring myself to kill a doggo

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RandyButterNubs

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Yeah I stop at 2, very vicious type of dogs.

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skywalker95

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Nitefall87

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@skywalker95: Fully healed of any injury after every round? Every injury?

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skywalker95

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MoneyyJunee

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#46  Edited By MoneyyJunee

I blitz and one-shot

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RikuYamaha

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any human could most likely solo with prep,but here i go.

Warthog-honestly, i could solo with one good direct hit to its brain. it'll drop fast.

German Shepard Dog- honestly,i believe this is weaker then a warthog,but i could still one shot with a machete. and considering my armor on,it could protect me from the bits,giving me enough time to slice it to pieces.

Baboon- honestly, i might stop here. way to fucious and way to strong. the only way i could possibly win is getting a cheap shot on. but i still believe i could win if i land one good decap land.

Wolf- honestly,this should be below baboon. but it will lunge at me,giving me time to lift up my machete and impaling it,ending it in one shot.

Hyena-this little fu**er bites though my armor like paper,but while it does,i impale it in the brain while its busy mauling me

Lion-no chance. dead.

Silverback Gorilla-no chance,dead.

Grizzly Bear-no chance,dead

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Nitefall87

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@nitefall87 said:

@skywalker95: Fully healed of any injury after every round? Every injury?

yep

Most humans win then. Most of the animals you listed do not one shot, they maim for a while. Watch any video with Lion tamers being attacked. Lions are unlikely to kill shot.

Silverbacks may win.

But we are talking about a human, wearing some armour and padding, and has a machete. Even if they are being attacked, they can keep swinging the machete.

And if the animal loses consciousness first, man wins cause injuries are instant healed.

Myself, and many others, clear 6/10 times.

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Rockette

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1 shotting a bloodlusted warthog with 1 machette swing...

No Caption Provided
@elsebbe said:

@green_skaar: Unless someone is like 400 lbs, the average human will be able to dodge it from 20 feet. A good hit will make it bleed or 1 shot it.

LOLOL! Agreed. We all get knocked to the ground and gored! Now, give me a decent spear and a full body Kevlar suit, and we make it to maybe the hyena...

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Azureus

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#50  Edited By Azureus

The Machete becomes less effective on the larger animals. Good for swinging, but stabbing is somewhat limited. Anything after 6 would probably kill you. Armed with a pocket knife...and most humans can clear mid-diff.