Batman Battle of the Month VOTING: Batman vs. Squirrel Girl

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k4tzm4n

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k4tzm4n  Moderator

Poll Batman Battle of the Month VOTING: Batman vs. Squirrel Girl (415 votes)

Batman because he's Batman 42%
Squirrel Girl because she's Squirrel Girl 52%
Stalemate because they're both full of amazingness and can't lose. 7%

Batman has faced a lot of talented and deadly characters in this monthly gauntlet. From Taskmaster to X-23, DC's most iconic street level hero has his abilities put to the test each and every month. Seeing as this is the Batman Battle of the Month for April, we thought we'd do something really fun. Sure, we could have selected someone like Galactus or give Wayne five minutes of prep time and then have him go against the Avengers, but none of those options even remotely compare to the combatant we've selected. Can Batman overcome Squirrel Girl, a character that could possibly be his greatest challenge yet? Will he walk away the victor or will the onslaught of claws be too much for Bruce to handle?

Match Rules

  • Combatants are in character (aka morals apply for both).
  • This is a random encounter (aka no prep/prior knowledge for either).
  • They're fighting in a generic downtown city setting. It's unpopulated, at night and all standard city lights remain on. Assume they start roughly 40 feet apart and visible. There's a fair amount of cover between them (parked vehicles, bus stops and such). The entire area is on limits. This means alleys, rooftops, building interiors, etc.
  • Both characters have their standard gear. For simplicity's sake, let's say there's something just like Central Park 3 blocks away. Assume it has a moderate amount of squirrels.
  • Incapacitation, knockout or death all count as elimination. Making a tactical retreat counts as a loss, too.
  • Just to clarify: Batman has his New 52 gear, however, his skill feats from the pre-52 era can be taken into account since he's supposed to be as skilled as he once was. Plus, that just makes things more fun to speculate, right?
  • Hey, you know what would be really cool? Treating everyone else in the debate with respect. If you think someone's saying something that just isn't true, go ahead and stick to the facts to point out why. There's no need at all to drop insults just because you disagree with someone. Seriously, this is just talking about a fictional fight, there's no need for immaturity and mudslinging. Throw in the fact this is the April edition and you can bet there's going to be a lot of lighthearted posts made for both sides. Long story short, be cool.
  • If you think the poll isn't going how it should, making an informative post about why a character is being underestimated and spreading the word is far more useful than complaining and name calling. Just saying.
  • One more thing: you don't need to write an essay to be selected as the Viner Argument of the Week. Sometimes concise posts can be way more effective than a flood of paragraphs. And yes, odds are we'll opt to highlight the funniest posts in Friday's update.
Warning: your brain may not be ready for a fight this epic.

Viners, you have the week to research, debate and vote! This means there's no reason to vote right away if you don't have all of the info you need to make an educated decision. Check the homepage Friday for an updated article with the following:

  • Thoughts from the staff.
  • A Viner Argument for both characters (can't include scans and must be in the poll thread).
  • If we're lucky, blurbs from industry talent.

Feel free to make future "Batman: Battle of the Month" suggestions in the comments below or via Twitter!

 • 
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Cream_God

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Sex it ends in

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Wolverine008

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darkbeam

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#3  Edited By darkbeam

Batman dies horribly.

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Wolfrazer

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#4  Edited By Wolfrazer  Online

What next? Is Bats gonna fight against Bugs Bunny?

Though being serious for a moment, can't Bats just take out Squirrel Girl while avoiding the squirrels?

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Sovereign91001

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Squirrel Girl, even Batman can't beat the Squirrel Force.

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Wolverine008

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What next? Is Bats gonna fight against Bugs Bunny?

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Jonez_

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Squirrel Girl. Somebody prove me wrong please.

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k4tzm4n

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#8 k4tzm4n  Moderator

@jonez120 said:

Squirrel Girl. Somebody prove me wrong please.

You just set yourself up for a whole lot of "Batman always wins" pictures.

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Cjdavis103

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trolling level over 9000

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Wolverine008

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trolling level over 9000

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Riddlergeist

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ok... ok... ok...

here we have a character who is completely skilled and takes on people over his league due to his tactical thinking and intelligence, as well as his gadgets and h2h skill

on the other hand we have a character who showed up outta nowhere and only wins as punchlines to a joke comic.

if a squirrel girl writer is creating this battle, she wins.

but we have a random encounter and no writers preference.

batman should logically win this.

-Riddle Me This

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Jonny_Anonymous

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#12  Edited By Jonny_Anonymous

Squirrels are rodents.

Bats are rodent's with wings.

Ergo Batman wins.

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RustyRoy

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Squirrel Girl kneels before the BatGod.

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k4tzm4n

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#14  Edited By k4tzm4n  Moderator

"Stalemate because they're both full of amazingness and can't lose" only has 3%?!

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Wolfrazer

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#15  Edited By Wolfrazer  Online
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lifeofvibe

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batman because hes batman

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SlickyMike88

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I'm kinda tired of Batman so I vote for Squirl gitl

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Deadpool2325

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Doom didn't stand a chance. So how does Batman?

http://sketchcardsaloon.files.wordpress.com/2012/09/squirrel-girl-marvel-heroes-mmo-doom.jpg

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dondave

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The Universe implodes

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CheeseSticks

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Squirrel Girl stomp Batman. She beat Thanos.

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Outside_85

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Batman... because Tree-Rat Girl is an in-house joke.

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Jonez_

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@k4tzm4n said:

@jonez120 said:

Squirrel Girl. Somebody prove me wrong please.

You just set yourself up for a whole lot of "Batman always wins" pictures.

Yesssss. I must bait them...

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AllStarSuperman

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#23  Edited By AllStarSuperman  Online

knockout gas ftw

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deactivated-5e8a1f5fafc4e

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The vine is going explode. These are not forces for mere mortals to contend with.

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Riddlergeist

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knockout gas ftw

thank you... the only guy on the thread using logic...

-Riddle Me This

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deactivated-5edd330f57b65

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Really hope this doesn't actually count in Batman's win/lost record. Even if he wins. But I was really hoping for Galactus... This sucks

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AllStarSuperman

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Extremis

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Who the eff is Squirrel Girl?

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Wolfrazer

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#29 Wolfrazer  Online

@allstarsuperman said:

knockout gas ftw

thank you... the only guy on the thread using logic...

-Riddle Me This

I was thinking that too, but wasn't sure. cause that just seems like an easy win. Though he could just use the gas, knock the squirrels out and take out SG.

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k4tzm4n

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#30 k4tzm4n  Moderator
@jayc1324 said:

Really hope this doesn't actually count in Batman's win/lost record. Even if he wins. But I was really hoping for Galactus... This sucks

No, the April Fools ones are just for fun. No matter what the outcome is, it won't be on the record.

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dondave

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ShenKuei

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If this was 60's Adam West Batman he would just bust out his Squirrel-Repellant-Bat-Spray but current Batman would need prep to deal with a menace this terrifying.

Squirrel Girl 9/10

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dorukesin

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fatman

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RisingBean

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Doom didn't stand a chance. So how does Batman?

Because Bruce won't suffer from PIS. I bolded the S just because Squirrel girl is that stupid.

Somebody at Marvel needs to lose a job over her. Seriously.

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deactivated-5edd330f57b65

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MadeinBangladesh

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BATMAN has nooooo chance!!!!

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frozen

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#37 frozen  Moderator

Batman > Spectre > Squirrel Girl.

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judasnixon

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#38  Edited By judasnixon

Squirrel Girl.... Suck it Batman!

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Mutant God

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Squirrel Girl, because Batman wouldn't waste time fighting someone who isn't a threat to society

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patrat18

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Lets see Sg kick someone of Spectre's level in the face, than we'll talk.

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Erik

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@k4tzm4n said:
@jayc1324 said:

Really hope this doesn't actually count in Batman's win/lost record. Even if he wins. But I was really hoping for Galactus... This sucks

No, the April Fools ones are just for fun. No matter what the outcome is, it won't be on the record.

You fear the fanboy! COWARD!!!

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k4tzm4n

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#42 k4tzm4n  Moderator

@erik said:

@k4tzm4n said:
@jayc1324 said:

Really hope this doesn't actually count in Batman's win/lost record. Even if he wins. But I was really hoping for Galactus... This sucks

No, the April Fools ones are just for fun. No matter what the outcome is, it won't be on the record.

You fear the fanboy! COWARD!!!

It works both ways! Let's say Batman beats Galactus in next year's April edition. That too shouldn't be on his record.

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ClawFist

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Squirrel Girl is the one who knocks!

Squirrel Girl is Omnipotent!

Squirrel Girl is inherently OP and cannot be stopped. Sorry Batman.

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Erik

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@k4tzm4n said:

@erik said:

@k4tzm4n said:
@jayc1324 said:

Really hope this doesn't actually count in Batman's win/lost record. Even if he wins. But I was really hoping for Galactus... This sucks

No, the April Fools ones are just for fun. No matter what the outcome is, it won't be on the record.

You fear the fanboy! COWARD!!!

It works both ways! Let's say Batman beats Galactus in next year's April edition. That too shouldn't be on his record.

I would love for that to be on his record. That way everyone would know that the majority of CV's batfans are drinking a bit too much guano.

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Kerrigan

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#45  Edited By Kerrigan

Squirrel Girl, because apparently it's funny.

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SoopahSoup

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squirrel girl

u cant destroy a god

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darkstar327

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BATMAN FTW

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Lucano

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#48  Edited By Lucano

Under comic book logic Squirrel Girl should be taking this. This thread was created with humurous intentions and well, it managed to make me and many others (I assume) laugh, therefor, the punchline of the thread would be Squirrel Girl actually winning (Off panel).

Under a more serious look, Batman is a master martial artist and has crazy gear with him. But Squirrel Girl is above peak human, at least in reflexes and manages to use all her squirrels in very imaginative ways. Personally I think Squirrel Girl would be able to take a slight majority against The Bat, without a plot getting in the way. Besides, Batman has always had some trouble with humurous oponents.

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cloudguy

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I'm not so sure, but I think batman will win this.

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reaverlation

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Batman kicked spectre,started COIE, created the Thought Robot,and is the Primal Monitor.Batman batstomps