Deadpool #13

Another "lost" Deadpool issue...this one from the '70s!

Deadpool hits the streets with Power Man & Iron Fist!

Synopsis

In his bachelor pad, Deadpool sees an ad for the Heroes for Hire. He mistakes the ad for being someone looking for a hero to hire, instead of the reality that people will be looking for heroes from the agency to hire. He heads over to erroneously offer his services.

On the way, Deadpool runs into a very sour Aunt May. She doesn't like him and pepper sprays him. He bungles into the subway and barges into a bathroom to wash his eyes out. He cuts in front of two rollerskating dudes and they are not happy about it. He beats them up. Outside the bathroom, a softball team gets mad that Deadpool beat up the rollerskating guys. They recant, but Deadpool beats them up anyway.

Deadpool arrives uptown and barges in on Luke Cage and Iron Fist talking with a potential client. He offers his services but the two shun him. The client relates how her husband was killed by some street toughs demanding payment for protection. She states that the killer is the White Man. Iron Fist suggests that he and Luke Cage act as new proprietor's in the client's store and lure the White Man in. With the plan decided, Luke Cage kicks Deadpool onto the street.

Iron Fist and Luke Cage set up shop and assure the client and her very attractive daughter that things will be fine. Then Deadpool walks in dressed as a pimp demanding money for protection. He wants to get White Man's attention so that the ladies in the shop don't have to deal with him anymore. The two heroes see little by way of options and so they essentially let Deadpool beat them up for protection money. Deadpool rushes out and runs headlong into the White Man's men. They recognize him as the new shakedown in town and beat him senseless.

Deadpool awakens to find himself tied up and staring at the White Man. He gets beat up a bit. A box falls over and spills what looks to be knock-off power rings (like the Mandarin wears). Deadpool gets shoved into a room with the client's daughter to await being killed. Deadpool is untied and he looks for something the two of them can do to wait out the time until they die. The daughter immediately takes off her clothes and propositions Deadpool to spend their last few moments loving. They begin, but Luke Cage barges in before the two can get too far.

Deadpool joins Luke Cage and Iron Fist for a battle against White Man's minions. The battle is fierce and Deadpool annoyingly gets most of the glory. The White Man has had enough and he uses his pimp cane as a power source to turn objects into stone. He aims at Deadpool, but Deadpool is too quick and places a minion in the path of the beam. Deadpool then turns the stick on the White Man, freezing him in stone.

The authorities show up and clean up the crime ring. Deadpool removes his mask and the client's daughter is appalled that she was so intimate with so ugly a thing. Deadpool puts his mask back on and heads out into the night. The softball team from before finds him and beats him to a pulp with their bats.

Years - decades - go by and the White Man acts as a statue in some person's home. Foreclosure happens and movers attempt to pack the statue. They drop him, however, and the White Man is able to burst forth from his stony cocoon. He kills the movers and swears revenge on Iron Fist, Luke Cage, and especially Deadpool.

Notes:

• The cover is a homage of the black exploitation movie posters of the 1970s.