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How to Kill Wolverine

Let's find a creative way to kill Wolverine

In the current Wolverine series, Wolvie's body has been taken over by a demon, and Wolverine tries very hard to regain control; however, the X-Men develop a plan to kill Wolverine, for good. The plan was pretty cool, and pretty plausible. It went like so.

  1. Magneto busts in and rips the adamantium from Wolverine's skeleton.
  2. Namor rips Wolverine's head off.

Pretty sweet and simple. Sure there's also some optic blasts from Cyclops, but that's just a little bit of fun overkill. It got me thinking, are there other ways to kill Wolverine? Aside from a character "wishing his death" or something along those lines, there's got to be a few different ways to kill the ragin Canuck, right? Well, I've come up with a few plausible scenarios involving some Marvel characters.
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== TEASER ==

Scenario #1

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Featured Wolvie-Stoppers: Leech & The Vision
This is probably the simplest of ways to kill old Logan. "How simple?" You may ask? Well, check it out. First, have Leech get close to Wolverine, using his mutant power to nullify Wolverine's powers.

Next, Vision will come in, doesn't matter if it's the original Vision or the Iron Lad version, alter his density, put his hand into Wolverine's brain and play "blender" with his brains, and then pull them all out. It's hard to regenerate when you don't have any brains. Extremely violent? Yes. Successful? Double Yes.

Chance of Wolverine Surviving: Depends how long Leech stays around to get of that pesky healing factor. But chances are, if Leech stayed around for a day or two, there's no way Wolverine could come back from that.

Scenario #2

Featured Wolvie-Stoppers: Rogue (Pre-Power Control) & Jean Grey (No Phoenix)
I'm getting pretty specific here with my character choices, but oh well. This one is pretty simple, I hope. Jean Grey is there for a few reasons: distraction, containment, and detection.

So, Jean Grey distracts Wolverine, which won't be so hard because Logan is in love with her. I'm pretty sure she just has to wave, and he'll be distracted for a few minutes. Rogue can come up behind him and suck the life out of him. Since this is the Rogue before she gained ability to control her powers, she can get to the point where she is sucking the life out of Wolverine, and possibly kill him. That brings us to Jean Grey. She is there to use her telekinesis to hold Wolvie in place, and use her telepathy to detect whether or not Wolverine is alive. Worse comes to worse, Jean Grey can use her telekinesis to send Logan into space. Is it overkill? Maybe. Is it necessary? Yes.

Chance of Wolverine Surviving: 50/50. It all depends on how powerful Wolverine's healing factor is, and whether or not his brain decides to shut down from Rogue's draining process. That's why we have the launching into space plan, just in case.
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You know what the worst part is about this? I spent a lot of time over the weekend wondering how/who could kill Wolverine. I wanted to stay away from all the cosmic characters and characters who can wish people out of existence, but when it comes down to it, he's a hard character to kill. Aside from the amazing healing factor, getting past his senses, fighting ability, and that pesky adamantium skeleton makes him extremely tough.

Maybe that's why the original plan, in the current Wolverine series, is so darn cool because it involves a team of the most powerful mutants showing no mercy and ending him as fast as possible. The worst part was I could only come up with two feasible ways of killing Wolverine that didn't overlap with each other. So, that being said, how would you kill Wolverine?

Rules For Killing Wolverine:

  1. Has to be Marvel characters only.
  2. No one with cosmic powers.
  3. No one that can "wish" the character away.
  4. Cannot overlap with the original plan Cyclops/Wolverine/Namor had.
  5. Be creative.

Good luck!

~Mat "inferiorego" Elfring is a comedian, writer, comic store employee, and teacher.