Corrupt the wish

Thanck you, have a horrible Halloween,
 
I wish i was a telepath.

Billy Mays tells you to shut your whore mouth when he's talking
 
I wish Santa Claus was real.

Will give coal, because you'r evil.
 
I wish i had wings.

The series ended about 2 or 3 years ago.
 
I wish everyone in comicvine was famous.

We all become well-known.... only, we're infamous.
 
I wish I had a private jet.

too poor to buy jet fuel  
 
i wish i had vitakinesis (the ability to heal things)

Your power has the unintentional effect of turning corpses into flesh-eating zombies.

I wish I had some chap stick.

your get chap stick and its cherry flavored but one problem it makes you look like your wearing lip stick  
 
i wish i had bullet time abilities 

You can't turn your bullet timing off and the rest of your life goes by in mind-numbingly slow motion.

I wish I could punch through walls.

1.you punch threw a support beam and the building falls on you and you get crushed 
2.you punch threw the walls into an electric box and fry your self 
 
i wish i had human physical perfection

you lack the intelligence to properly use this perfection
 
I wish I had all the powers of the Worldbreaker Hulk, Could control my strength, Didn't kill anyone unless they're like Doomsday or need to be, and could control all the abilites and have Bruce Banner Like intelligence

You have to pay an arm and a leg to find clothes, a house, a car, pencils, keyboards, ect that fit your body size.

I wish I had the power to jump really high.

people fear you and launch a nuclear attack agenst you in an attempt to kill you they fail and kill millions 
 
i wish i had total control over chronokinesis (control of time) as well as the power of it and it didnt harm me in any way

"

You have to pay an arm and a leg to find clothes, a house, a car, pencils, keyboards, ect that fit your body size.

 

 

I wish I had the power to jump really high.

"

Your curiosity gets the better of you and you travel back in time to before the birth of reality and you cease to exist.

I wish that I never have a wish come true.

It includes even mild desires, resulting in only the things you don't want to happen happening.
 
 
 I wish I could tell the difference between butter and I can't believe it's not butter.

You take a new pill freshly approved by the f.d.a to tell the difference between butter. Unfortunately you're in the 1% percentile of users that lose all their taste buds as a side effect.
 
 
I wish for a magical blazer that gives me lazer eyes on Tuesday's and Thursday's

it only works when you wear it and its baby sized 
 
i wish i had sunglasses that fit me that are indestructible and gives me super speed healing control of black and green flame and when i got angry would turn me into an immortal demon

After a full day of an indestructible super speed/black&green flame fueled demon murder spree you put the glasses down in your passenger seat of your car and go to pick up your best friend, who then in turn proceeds to not look before he leaps into your car and crushes your sunglasses with his stupid indestructible crushing butt
 
I wish for a good wholesome moral compass

damnit spencer....you get the wholesome moral compass and it shows you who has a good moral compass  and who has a bad one 
 
i wish i was able to spell words right with out haveing to double checking

You realize that you can only spell words correctly  in japanese causing you much turmoil because you still don't understand the language
 
I wish for the ability to make everyone in the worlds farts to smell like old spice deodorant

all the food in the would turns to old spice deodorant  
 
i wish that my farts sounded like burps and my burps sounded like farts

No one likes you anymore and you are exiled to the Moon. 
 
I wish to rule the world in the name of justice and truth.

The world has no yin to it's yang anymore, no injustice and Lies to it's Justice and truth and everyone gets super bored and lame and gets good at scrabble, meanwhile you can't find anything good on tv
 
I wish I had a moon base

You build a moon base but it's weight causes the moon to go off course in its rotation and it crashes into the earth.
 
I wish I had the ability to turn into animals

You get stuck in your hawk transformation and can't turn back ( bonus to knowing what old school book I'm referencing)
 
I wish I had someone make me breakfast right now

your coffee is burnt  
 
i wish i had a s.h.e.i.l.d like hellicaryor and unlimited fuel for it and enough staff to run it with out it crashing

Your staff is made up of Ultron l.M.D's and you get murdered for being fleshly and made of meat
 
I wish I could have superman's powers and none of his weaknesses

you have no control of the power and end up flying threw the sun and into deep space (not sure if that would actually hurt you) 
@Tyler Starke said:

" After a full day of an indestructible super speed/black&green flame fueled demon murder spree you put the glasses down in your passenger seat of your car and go to pick up your best friend, who then in turn proceeds to not look before he leaps into your car and crushes your sunglasses with his stupid indestructible crushing butt I wish for a good wholesome moral compass "

i wish my friends butt didn't smash my glasses "

it hardens wall you are jumping on it and you break your ankle 
 
i wish i had audiokinesis (control of sound)

You go deaf
 
I wish I had a talking miniature bear/elephant hybrid

wall you are sleeping it bites you in the privates due to its hate of you making it 
 
i wish i had the power of...bearmanpig

You go feral, get captured by animal control and put to sleep. Then made into bacon sandwiches. 
 
I wish I had every power in existence and no weakness and could control the power. (Corrupt that!)

you gain the power of death only its your death and you dont know it when you use it and you die 
 
i wish i could fight bruce lee 

You fight Bruce Lee but he kicks you in the balls so hard you have to get them removed.
 
I wish I had X-Ray vision.

ah you wish for the vision of X-ray so you shall have it only it gets stuck so that every one you see is meat no skin no clothes just surrounded by scaryness 
 
i wish that i had an iron man like suit that worked perfectly and was my own creation

Matt Fraction makes you forcibly insert *Blank* up your *Blank* until you renounce technology 
 
I wish I had a house made out of super models

you get the suit and then the US government kills you for the technology.
 
I wish I owned my own restaurant.

sorry, I guess I was typing at the same time you were posting =P

" Matt Fraction makes you forcibly insert *Blank* up your *Blank* until you renounce technology   I wish I had a house made out of super models "

The US government sees you as a threat to national security and imprisons you.

I wish I could burp the ABC's.

when you reach z you puke blood
 
i wish i owned the u.s.a. government 

The day after you own the united states of america's government, John Booth is resurrected and Sic Semper Tryannis's your a$$
 
I wish I could direct my very own motion picture with a script and actors of my own choosing and an unlimited budget

Every movie reviewer in the country would say it's absolutely the very worst movie they have ever seen.

I wish Chuck Norris wasn't real.

Chuck Norris reads this thread and internet punches your face off
 
I wish I wasn't the president