Avatar image for matchstick
#1 Posted by Matchstick (568 posts) - - Show Bio

So you're in the bathroom and you just took a deuce, do you sit or stand to wipe?    I realize it's a pretty weird question, but it's to settle a disagreement between the wife and I.  One of us sits, the other stands and we both think the other is the one doing it weird.  

Avatar image for joshmightbe
#2 Posted by joshmightbe (27423 posts) - - Show Bio

This is why I love comicvine right here

Avatar image for _zombie_
#3 Posted by _Zombie_ (10572 posts) - - Show Bio

Sit. I don't trust my hand-eye coordination to not drop the toilet paper on my pants or something.

Avatar image for glitch_spawn
#4 Posted by Glitch_Spawn (17180 posts) - - Show Bio

You stand up and wipe like a normal human being.

Avatar image for knightrise
#5 Posted by KnightRise (4811 posts) - - Show Bio

Sit. I used to stand until I was 12.

Avatar image for yourneighborhoodcomicgeek
#6 Posted by YourNeighborhoodComicGeek (21616 posts) - - Show Bio

A combination man. A bit of that and a bit of that.

Avatar image for _slim_
#7 Posted by _slim_ (16520 posts) - - Show Bio

I don't wipe at all.

Avatar image for monsterstomp
#8 Posted by MonsterStomp (31199 posts) - - Show Bio

@Glitch_Spawn said:

You stand up and wipe like a normal human being.

Comment of the day.

Online
Avatar image for blood1991
#9 Posted by Blood1991 (8115 posts) - - Show Bio

This would be better as a poll....

Anyway I hover a bit to wipe, but I don't stand.

Avatar image for matchstick
#10 Posted by Matchstick (568 posts) - - Show Bio
@Blood1991 said:

This would be better as a poll....

Anyway I hover a bit to wipe, but I don't stand.

I was going to make it a poll, but wanted to give a little more explanation to the question.
Avatar image for blood1991
#11 Edited by Blood1991 (8115 posts) - - Show Bio

@Matchstick: Agh I see. I'm curious as to how that even became an argument, but I'll respect your privacy there and just watch as well as a community share our toilet habits.

Avatar image for matchstick
#12 Posted by Matchstick (568 posts) - - Show Bio
@Blood1991 said:

@Matchstick: Agh I see. I'm curious as to how that even became an argument, but I'll respect your privacy there and just watch as well as a community share our toilet habits.

Our toddler is starting to do his own wiping in the bathroom and seeing how hilariously weird he does it sparked the conversation.  In case you're wondering our toddler stands up, bends over, puts his head on the floor and kicks one leg up on the sink. lol
Avatar image for blood1991
#13 Posted by Blood1991 (8115 posts) - - Show Bio

@Matchstick said:

@Blood1991 said:

@Matchstick: Agh I see. I'm curious as to how that even became an argument, but I'll respect your privacy there and just watch as well as a community share our toilet habits.

Our toddler is starting to do his own wiping in the bathroom and seeing how hilariously weird he does it sparked the conversation. In case you're wondering our toddler stands up, bends over, puts his head on the floor and kicks one leg up on the sink. lol

O_O

Kid gets Boss status for most intricate toiletry.

Avatar image for mercy_
#14 Posted by Mercy_ (94555 posts) - - Show Bio
@Matchstick
@Blood1991 said:

@Matchstick: Agh I see. I'm curious as to how that even became an argument, but I'll respect your privacy there and just watch as well as a community share our toilet habits.

Our toddler is starting to do his own wiping in the bathroom and seeing how hilariously weird he does it sparked the conversation.  In case you're wondering our toddler stands up, bends over, puts his head on the floor and kicks one leg up on the sink. lol
Your kid is adorable.
Moderator
Avatar image for matchstick
#15 Posted by Matchstick (568 posts) - - Show Bio
@Mercy_: Thank you!  He's at that nice stage where he's really weird but in a super cute way.
Avatar image for mercy_
#16 Posted by Mercy_ (94555 posts) - - Show Bio
@Matchstick 2-3? I don't have kids but from experience (large family and tons of cousins, some of whom now have their own kids) that's about the most adorable age there is.
Moderator
Avatar image for matchstick
#17 Posted by Matchstick (568 posts) - - Show Bio
@Mercy_: Good call!  He's 3.
Avatar image for longbowhunter
#18 Posted by longbowhunter (9415 posts) - - Show Bio

I used to stand and wipe. Then someone called me out and I learned to stay seated. Leaning to one side will break a toilet seat if you're not careful though.

Avatar image for the_stegman
#19 Posted by The Stegman (35919 posts) - - Show Bio
@Glitch_Spawn said:

You stand up and wipe like a normal human being.

This, seriously how the heck do you do it sitting down??
Avatar image for urban_ronin
#20 Posted by Urban_Ronin (10000 posts) - - Show Bio

I have an entire ritual.

Avatar image for mercy_
#21 Posted by Mercy_ (94555 posts) - - Show Bio
@Quintus_Knightfall dear god

@Matchstick three year olds are the cutesttt. They're finally getting defined personalities and all the cite little quirks, but they've got this innate playfulness and cheekiness.
Moderator
Avatar image for urban_ronin
#22 Posted by Urban_Ronin (10000 posts) - - Show Bio

@Mercy_: I cant breath hahahahaha

Avatar image for quinn_gallagher
#23 Posted by Quinn Gallagher (203 posts) - - Show Bio

@Quintus_Knightfall: knowing you it involves looking in a mirror and congratulating yourself on how great you are

Avatar image for joshmightbe
#24 Posted by joshmightbe (27423 posts) - - Show Bio

For me this depends completely on the time of day, If its the middle of the day I may stand but if its like 6 in the morning I will do what ever takes the least effort

Avatar image for urban_ronin
#25 Posted by Urban_Ronin (10000 posts) - - Show Bio

@Quinn Gallagher: dont hate

Avatar image for quinn_gallagher
#26 Posted by Quinn Gallagher (203 posts) - - Show Bio

@Quintus_Knightfall: what the actual fck

Avatar image for jedixman
#27 Posted by JediXMan (37507 posts) - - Show Bio

...

Moderator
Avatar image for inverno
#28 Posted by Inverno (13756 posts) - - Show Bio

What kind of thread is this lol

Avatar image for matchstick
#29 Posted by Matchstick (568 posts) - - Show Bio
@CaioTrubat said:

What kind of thread is this lol

The settling an argument with my wife kind of thread, lol. 
Avatar image for dark_vengeance_
#30 Posted by Dark_Vengeance_ (15333 posts) - - Show Bio

I get Alfred to do it for me.

Avatar image for deadpoolrules
#31 Posted by deadpoolrules (4818 posts) - - Show Bio

@joshmightbe said:

This is why I love comicvine right here

Yup,must agree with ya.

Avatar image for AssertingValor
#32 Posted by AssertingValor (7773 posts) - - Show Bio

@Glitch_Spawn: said:

You stand up and wipe like a normal human being.

Not while your in the "big house" lmao

Avatar image for kuonphobos
#33 Posted by kuonphobos (5191 posts) - - Show Bio

"matchstick"

LOL

Avatar image for satyrgod
#34 Posted by satyrgod (2116 posts) - - Show Bio

Real men cannot remain seated. There's no way around it (pun intended).

Avatar image for bruxae
#35 Posted by Bruxae (18147 posts) - - Show Bio

Wow, I had no idea that anyone did it standing up.. That is completely alien to me, wouldnt that make your butt cheeks clamp together smearing the poop all over them?

Atleast sitting down you can spread them a bit, and not drop the paper on the toilet ring or in your pants.. Standing up just sounds very dirty.

Avatar image for innervenom123
#36 Posted by InnerVenom123 (29887 posts) - - Show Bio

Depends on the damage.

Avatar image for urban_ronin
#37 Posted by Urban_Ronin (10000 posts) - - Show Bio

First rule of Poop Club is you dont talk about Poop Club.

Avatar image for swagger462
#38 Posted by Swagger462 (396 posts) - - Show Bio

@Bruxae said:

Wow, I had no idea that anyone did it standing up.. That is completely alien to me, wouldnt that make your butt cheeks clamp together smearing the poop all over them?

Atleast sitting down you can spread them a bit, and not drop the paper on the toilet ring or in your pants.. Standing up just sounds very dirty.

This. I actually didn't know that standing up to wipe was a thing.