I just watched the second episode of The Witcher series and it was hilarious. Geralt is an adult now (This will make later events funnier) towards the end of his training. As part of training him and others had to try and get a witcher off of his horse unarmed, which of course the person before Geralt fails at. Geralt takes an evasive approach and doesn't fight man-to-man because in this universe witchers are supposed to fight honourably. He manages to pull the armed man off his horse, somehow killing him in the process I think. If I am correct in thinking that, only a certain group of witchers actually cared and wanted revenge for it. There are also female witchers now which came from some other witcher school. Apparently none of the witchers in training have ever seen a woman before in their life and don't even know what they are. (Except for Geralt, who is old enough to remember his mother and he found a girl in the woods during the first episode.) A junkie witcher (seriously) explains what women are... ehm... For, leading Geralt to punch him in the face. They then arrive. Geralt sees one of them bathing nude and - naturally - hides in the bushes spying on her. (Adult BTW.) She sees him, gets out and tells him that it's her turn to watch him bathe. He takes off his top and the scene cuts. It is commented that by her that literally every witcher except for those two are asexual. He is told to spar with one of the best female witchers. He effortlessly dances around her every strike, luring her into traps and playing with her, predicting her every move and exploiting it. He is reprimanded once again for not fighting honourably and is brought before the witchers' council. (That exists now.) First he is asked how he knew the people were women, but anyways. There must be punishment for questioning the rules, and for now Geralt and his two witcher friends have to stand on a thin post for forty-eight hours without dropping and without anything like food or water. When their punishments have ended, Geralt's two friends drop from exhaustion at last, but Geralt manages to get down just barely, struggling to walk. He's then told that he has to leave in an hour on a mission. He goes up into the mountains where he's blindfolded and told by some witcher veteran to walk where he's told, as a test of trust I guess. This guy isn't happy about Geralt and what he's doing, so he tries to make him walk off a cliff. Geralt instinctively knows and calls the guy out on it, which is denied. Geralt grabs the guy and flips him off of the cliff so that he is left hanging. The guy explains his motivations and Geralt pulls him up, but has to exert himself to do so. The witcher then wants to kill Geralt anyway, and so he sprints at an unarmed Geralt who beats this witcher by... Stepping to the side and watching him tumble off the cliff. When he gets back to Kaer Morhen, (Which is literally just lots of rocks,) people questioned why he killed the witcher, and were also amazed at how he could defeat an "experienced witcher". HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!! People want Geralt kicked out of the order for his lack of honour, and this is when it's revealed why people want him dead. There is a disagreement, and Geralt is going to be put under trial. He asks Vesemir why witchers are asexual and what that means, which leads to a sex-ed lesson directed towards adult Geralt over an overly-dramatic sex scene.
Above is the bit. Be warned though, there is some nudity. There is some great music over their "encounter", and after that it just cuts to them awake and dressed, then her having a go at Geralt, to his confusion. That might be the funniest part of the episode. She is then exiled for having sex with Geralt, and Geralt is put in steel plate armour, which he claims he can barely move in. But it's for ceremony. He and his witcher pals are given their swords and medallions and are at last witchers. Because Geralt has criticized their ways, they present the best witcher for him to fight as a test: some guy wearing a Darth Vader helmet over the same armour Geralt is wearing. Geralt also wears this Vader helmet, but close-ups reveal that they're wearing balaclavas underneath or something. I didn't even see Geralt put it on. Because they are both wearing the exact same armour for their fight scenes with their faces concealed, we have no idea who's actually winning the fight because they look the same. They only take the helmets off towards the climax of the fight, where Geralt gets a flashback to his training and he kills the other witcher in one hit. Very impressive considering he said he could barely move in this armour, and his opponent was the one witcher who fights in plate and is used to it as a result. Geralt then sets off on the path as a witcher. The end.
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