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#1 Posted by sdrs619 (2 posts) - - Show Bio

im looking for more quotes like...

This guy goes into the hospital...and his wife just had a baby and he can't wait to see them both.
So he meets the doctor and he says, "Oh, Doc, I've been so worried. How are they?"
And the doctor smiles and says, "They're fine. Just fine. Your wife;s delivered a healthy baby boy and they're both in tip-top form.
"You're one lucky guy."
So the guy rushes into the maternity ward with flowers.
But its empty.
His wife's bed is empty.
"Doc?" He says and turns around to the doctor and all the nurses wave their arms and scream in his face.
April Fool! Your wife's dead and the baby's a spastic!!

The ones that are like a little story type thing. Another example are the 2 stories that joker in dark knight tells about his scars, but more like the above example. Any more would be amazingly appreciate.

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#2 Posted by FalconPuuunch (947 posts) - - Show Bio

I heard a joke once: Man goes to doctor. Says he’s depressed. Says life is harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone in a threatening world. Doctor says, “Treatment is simple. The great clown Pagliacci is in town tonight. Go see him. That should pick you up.” Man bursts into tears. Says, “But doctor… I am Pagliacci.” Good joke. Everybody laugh. Roll on snare drum. Curtains.