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Title: X-Men Institute #1: Welcome to School! Part 2

Author: Rabbitearsblog

Universe: X-Men

Rating: T - some sexual talk!

Summary: It's the X-Men's first day of school and even on the first day, they are having good and bad times dealing with the students!

Notes: This is my first story that is apart of my new "X-Men Institute" series and this is a comedy series on the X-Men universe!  Since this is the first time I'm writing a parody /sitcom series, some of the characters in this story might seem a bit out of character, but I will try to get better at writing parody/sitcom stories, so please be gentle with the criticisms!


Chapter 3: Meet the Second Generation X-Men!


The five mysterious figures ended up being the second generation X-Men (or the cooler X-Men crowd!) and they have the following members in the group: first up is James “Logan” Howlett, codename WOLVERINE.   He’s a Canadian mutant skeleton is made out of admantium (the strongest substance ever made, or is that titanium? Whatever.), but he’s as rough as heck, so if you mess with him, you going to get a face full of admantium claws, which pops out of his hands at any convenient time.   Then there’s Ororo Munroe, codename STORM; she can manipulate weather and is known to be a goddess from Africa. Not to mention she is as much as a motherly figure to the X-Men as Jean Grey is.   Kurt Wagner, codename NIGHTCRAWLER, is a German mutant who looks like a demon, what with his blue skin and yellow eyes, but he actually has a heart of gold.   Piotr Nikolaievitch Rasputin, codename COLOSSUS, is a Russian mutant who can turn his body to steel. He’s gentle and polite to everybody, but since he’s over six feet tall and very muscular, everybody is probably going to run away from him before they get the chance to know him. And last but certainly not least is Kitty Pryde, codename SHADOWCAT.   She’s a Jewish mutant who has the ability to phase through any matter and is the youngest of the group and she and Piotr seem to have it going on like Jean and Cyclops…


Anyway, the five members of the second generation were strutting through the hallway like they were movie stars, with Kurt carrying the boom box with “Jungle Boogie” playing and when they approached the original five X-Men, they stopped in front of them and Kurt put the boom box down and turned off the music.   The original five X-Men just stared at them dumbfounded and then Scott said, “What the heck was that?!”


“What? You ain’t impressed by our entrance Red?” asked Logan.


“I’m more stumped about why you’re carrying a boom box playing a song that’s as old as the 70s,” said Scott.


“Hey, it was Elf’s idea that we do this entrance,” said Logan.


“I just thought that it would be great playing a song that defined our entrance into the X-Men: the 70s!” said Kurt.


“Well, technically I made an entrance in the X-Men in the 80s, but I’m still close with this generation,” said Kitty.


“Da. Closer than you think Katya,” said Piotr slyly.   Kitty giggled.


“I will admit that I would not normally do this sort of thing, but I find it kind of fun,” said Ororo.


The bell suddenly rang and Kitty said, “Oh! I gotta run!   I got some counseling sessions with some students! See you guys!”


“Oh! Wait for me Katya! I will walk with you until I get to my art class!” said Piotr as he went after Kitty.


“Sigh. Those two are so cute together,” said Kurt.


“Yeah, yeah, we seen it enough times to get a side show on the whole romance,” said Logan.


“Well, I must be off also for my botany class,” said Ororo.


“BOTANY!?” exclaimed everyone.


“Well yes! I love plants and I know every kind of plant out there, so I enjoy teaching any subject that deals with plant life.   Goodbye everyone!” said Ororo.


“Bye,” said everyone.


“Oh! I got to go also! I have German language to teach! Are you coming Logan?” asked Kurt.


“I sure as heck am. Somebody’s gotta teach those kids about taking down enemies.   Hey Jean! Let me know when you wanna get together sometime, huh?” said Logan.


“Alright, stop flirting with Jean. She’s got a boyfriend,” said Scott.


“Sure Red, sure.” Said Logan and he Kurt left for their classes.


Jean Grey giggled, “You know, Logan may seem rough, but he’s got a good heart.”


“Yeah, just how much good is he getting with hitting on girls?” said Scott.


“Hey guys! How come we don’t have a groovy music playing when we come down the hallways?” asked Bobby.


“What? You want Beatles music playing when we strut down the hallways?” asked Warren.


"Well, the 60s was a very historical period," said Hank. "And so were the 70s, the 80s, the 90s, the..."


“I think we get the point Hank. I just hope my brain doesn’t melt before I get back to my class,” said Bobby


Everyone laughed and went to their classes.


Chapter 4: All in a Day’s Work!


When the bell rang again, all the students and teachers came out of the classrooms and started going to their rooms for a day’s rest.   The original five X-Men came together again to talk about their day’s events (big surprise).  


“YAWN.   Man, I’m beat. Teaching over a hundred students all day is enough to get you feeling like a slug,” said Bobby.


“You mean feeling ‘sluggish,” said Hank.


“It means the same thing,” said Bobby.


“Well, I for one and pardon the pun, am feeling like today’s events were just ‘beastly,” said Hank smiling.


“Ooh! Good one!” said Bobby.


Jean Grey, Warren and Scott were then walking towards Bobby and Hank.


“Boy, you guys sure look like you’ve been through a wringer,” said Jean Grey.


“All in a day’s work I say.   At least none of us went insane and jumped out the window once this day was over,” said Hank.


“Well, if I did jump out the window, I would just fly away into Hawaii or something, and spend my days relaxing under the sun away from the commotions of teacher hood,” said Warren.


“My thoughts exactly, if I could fly I mean,” said Scott.


“Well, I’m off to bed. Better get a good start on tomorrow’s “longest day of teaching law to students who think I’m a surfer dude” of my life session,” said Bobby.


“I’m headed off to bed too,” said Hank.


“You two coming also?” Warren asked Jean Grey and Scott.


“Nah, you three go on ahead. Me and Jean are just going to sit out for awhile,” said Scott.


“Alright lover birds! Catch you two later!” said Bobby and he, Hank and Warren went off to bed.


“Ugh. I hate it when he does that,” said Scott.


“Eh, don’t let it bother you. So, how was your day?” asked Jean Grey.


“Well, other than the fact that two students started punching each other because during our leadership activity, one of them wanted to be the leader of the X-Men group, but the other student wanted to be the leader and nearly blew up the classroom, I would say my day was okay,” said Scott. “And you?”


“Well other than more than twenty male students trying to hit on me again, I would say that my day was okay too,” said Jean Grey.


“Sigh, another average day for your normal average teacher,” said Scott.


“Yep.   And do you know what would make this day even more perfect?” asked Jean Grey.


Scott smiled slyly at her and said, “No, but I’m aiming to find out.”


“Well, you can find it out like this…” and Jean Grey leaned over and kissed Scott on the lips and Scott kissed her back.


And the two lovebirds stayed that way for the rest of the night.




Two mutant kids were sitting on the side of the window in their dormitories and they started coming up with a plan.


“Alright man! Once we take one step out of this window, we’ll be out of dullsville before the teachers even notice!” said one student.


“But what if somebody sees us?” asked the other student.


“Don’t worry man. Everybody’s asleep so we’ll be out in Hawaii or something by the time they wake up!”


So the two mutant students started to get ready to fly away from the Institute by hopping on the window to get some air.


“Ready?” asked the first student.


“Ready!” said the second student.


“Let’s go!” and both of the students started flying away towards the field until they hit a huge force field surrounding the school and were bounced back towards the Institute.


“AAAAHHHHH!!!!!” screamed both the students and they fell through the window they just flew out of and landed squarely in their beds.


“Whoa man! What the heck was that?” asked the first student.


“I don’t know! But whatever it was we sure as heck ain’t getting out of here!” yelped the second student.


In the shadows in the hallway, a man in a wheelchair was watching the two students fall back into their beds and he said to himself, “And that my children, is how you do things around here.” He smiled to himself and left the hallway to go to bed.


Oh Professor Xavier you sly devil!