Batman Year One: Dark Prince

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Abishai100

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Alas was a brooding young boy and heir to a prestigious family which was deposed by revolution. Alas's parents, sister, and Alas emigrated to America in the 1980s and lived in a small apartment in New York City where they struggled financially for some years. Alas's father became an alcoholic and was very abusive until his suicide. Alas and his mother and sister inherited some family money and used it to move to a nice suburban townhouse in Virginia in the early 1990s. While living in New York as a young boy under the terrible shadow of his abusive father, Alas became very reclusive and experimented with bizarre fantasies about darkness and hell.

Alas was very ambitious growing up in Virginia. He wanted to succeed to help his mother and sister. Alas was accepted into Princeton University on a merit scholarship and excelled in psychology, his major. During his junior year, Alas went on an exchange program to UCLA where he snapped and robbed a bank as a masked clown. After accomplishing the daring but criminal deed, he regretted his criminality and decided to give the money he stole to an AIDS charity. He then went back to Princeton University to complete his senior year.

In his senior year at Princeton, Alas took a course on criminal psychology and wrote his thesis on the motivations of cops and criminals caught up in tangled chases. Alas had a revelation and decided he wanted to be a vigilante. After graduating from Princeton, he took up a lucrative position at a wealthy consulting firm in Chicago and sent about $50K to his mother and sister every year. Alas was happy but was ready to begin his secret double-life as a masked vigilante. Alas made himself a bat-shaped costume and mask and called himself Batman. He was always fascinated by the survival skills of bats and their ability to see at night.

Alas was about to discover that his newfound quest for vigilante satisfaction would be tested by Chicago's overwhelming rise in criminal mania. Alas/Batman was prowling the city streets on a Saturday night, looking out for thugs and hoodlums when he noticed a strange man dressed in a giant top-hat and large bow-tie and carrying a glowing stick. Batman followed this man walking down the street. The man's name was Jervis and Batman noticed Jervis walk up to a policeman who was standing in an alley and use his glowing stick to jab the cop in the ribs, causing him to fall down. Jervis then lit the fallen cop on fire with a flame that came out of his glowing stick and then started running away. Batman chased Jervis down the block after helping the cop and then used his specially-made rope-gun to tie up Jervis's feet and wrestled him to the ground. Batman then transported Jervis to the police station, but on the way there, Batman asked Jervis why he did what he did to the cop to which Jervis eerily replied, "Because I'm the Mad Hatter, and I despise uniformed policemen!"

Alas was sitting in his lavish apartment and reading news stories on the Internet on a fine Saturday morning. Alas/Batman was satisfied that Jervis (the Mad Hatter) was incarcerated in an institute for the criminally insane. Alas read a strange editorial on the Internet website for the Chicago Tribune newspaper which read, "We are the Red Hood Gang, and we will take up the reins of the Mad Hatter!" Alas/Batman realized that this Red Hood Gang had written the editorial as a tongue-in-cheek social critique piece but intended to actually carry out the crimes in the pattern of the Mad Hatter somehow. Batman decided to prowl around Chicago that night searching for the Red Hood Gang. At about midnight, he found a group of individuals, a gang of five, dressed in red ski masks, and one of them was a female. This gang, which must have been the Red Hood Gang, Alas realized, walked up to the Chicago Police Department and threw smoke bombs into the windows and then sped away in their car. Batman followed them in his specially jet-boosted black Cadillac. The female member of the gang was thrown out of the car.

Batman pulled over and helped the woman up and asked her who she was and why she was thrown out of the car. She replied, "My name is Harley Quinn. I thought I was a loyal member of the Red Hood Gang, but they threw me out knowing you were following us and would stop to help me so they could speed away! The Red Hood Gang, I don't mind telling you, intends to recruit orphaned children as bomb-carrying minions against Chicago!" Batman escorted 'Harley Quinn' to the police station and returned to his apartment to begin taking notes on the Red Hood Gang. Alas/Batman realized that Chicago was about to face the criminality of very bizarre super-terrorists. Alas wondered if tackling criminals of this evil nature would test his mettle and spirit as a vigilante and his confidence in his education in psychology. "What's the difference between a vigilante and a terrorist?" Alas asked himself; he also thought about his own troubled childhood. He knew he needed to be confident about his sense of ethics, and Chicago was about to become the staging ground for a serious psychological rapture.

In the cell of the Mad Hatter, Jervis was reading a letter someone had sent him. It read, "Greetings, Jervis! You've become something of a celebrity! My name is Scarecrow, and I plan to haul you out of your cell next week so you can help me with my awesome scheme to poison Chicago's drinking water." The Mad Hatter gave an eerie grin and realized that criminality in Chicago was burgeoning, and not even Batman could inspire peace. The Mad Hatter hatched a terrible scheme to turn Batman into an outcast. Jervis planned to convince the people of Chicago that Batman was a Satanist.

Michael Myers: The Dark Knight

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cbishop

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@Abishai100: The story itself isn't bad, but you said that this might be your last fanfic. You really need to continue this story. It needs a satisfactory ending.

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Chapter 2: Robin's Rise

Alas was in his apartment reading an film profile of American actor Tom Cruise, who had starred in various culture-rich films such as Born on the Fourth of July, The Color of Money, War of the Worlds, and Valkyrie. He read that Cruise said in an interview that he had read much about this new Chicago vigilante who was being called 'Batman' for his odd preoccupation with 'nocturnal crime.' Alas wondered if Cruise himself was curious about vigilantism culture in the American city, so he wrote Cruise a fan letter:

"Dear Mr. Cruise, after seeing the film Sin City and reading your interview in which you claimed you were curious about Chicago's new vigilante --- Batman --- I started to wonder if you yourself are curious about vigilantism culture in America (and Chicago), in which case, I was wondering if you wanted to meet me in the lobby of the Chicago Marriott hotel. I'll be wearing sunglasses and a hat and holding a copy of the Wall Street Journal. I have information about Batman which may interest you since you have some degree of influence in the media."

Alas went to the hotel and was delighted to see Cruise had showed up, disguised in a hooded sweatshirt. He walked up to Alas and asked him, "Are you Alas?" They went to a room in the hotel where they talked about Batman. Alas told Cruise that Alas was Batman and wondered if Cruise was interested in helping him by talking about Batman in the media. Cruise agreed and told Alas he was concerned that our modern age preoccupation with the media could potentially create copycat criminals. Cruise further added that since there were already stories of people committing copycat crimes modelled after scenes from Oliver Stones controversial crime-glorification film Natural Born Killers, that he was afraid that impressionable individuals (looking to make zany critiques of American society/culture) would commit copycat crimes modelled after the horror ghouls from the iconic American films Friday the 13th and The Texas Chainsaw Massacre this coming Halloween. Alas was shocked to discover Cruise was so versed in 'vigilantism paranoia' like Batman and asked Cruise if he wanted to be Batman's secret ally. Cruise replied, "Keep me posted!"

Alas/Batman realized Cruise was right about the horror film copycat crime potential in Chicago this coming Halloween. There were already rumors in the underground that Scarecrow was planning to poison Chicago's water reservoir with dangerous amounts of LSD. Alas/Batman decided to send an anonymous letter to the Chicago Police Department warning them of this water-poisoning scheme. He then began patrolling the Halloween costume stores in Chicago, seeing if anyone purchased Jason Voorhees or Leatherface costumes. After two months of inspection, in August, Alas discovered that two individuals had purchased such costumes, and he began following them. The two individuals were Edward Cain and Thomas Hewitt, average Americans living in suburban neighbourhoods right outside Chicago.

On Halloween Eve, while Batman was patrolling Chicago's streets very closely, he realized two people were roaming around dressed as Jason Voorhees and Leatherface. He immediately began following them. The two costumed ghouls had met up and were walking together, seemingly in Halloween spirit, but when they began attacking a parked police car in which two cops were sitting inside drinking coffee, Batman swung in, used his rope-gun to tie up their feet, and disarmed them. When he unmasked them, he discovered the two men were Edward Cain and Thomas Hewitt, and their costume-festive machete and chainsaw turned out to be real articles. The cops in the parked cars got out, arrested Cain and Hewitt, and transported them to jail.

The next week, Alas read an interview of Tom Cruise in which the famous actor said, "I read about those two psychos in Chicago dressed up as Jason Voorhees and Leatherface on Halloween Eve and arrested with the help of the so-called 'Batman!' I wonder, alas, if modern media is giving too much attention to crime and violence. It's good to see we have the opposite of the 'dark side' in this seemingly well-intentioned 'Batman' character. Maybe I'll help 'Batman' if I can by telling him I intend to be a casual 'media sidekick' named Robin!"

Alas/Batman realized he had a real ally in Tom Cruise and began referring to him privately as Robin. Batman was now tracking Scarecrow and was investigating any suspicious activities near Chicago's water reservoir. One day, while inspecting the reservoir area, Batman noticed a limo drove up. The man inside the limo opened his window and gave him a sealed letter and told him it was from Cruise/Robin. Batman felt much more optimistic about teamwork against criminality in Chicago. Alas/Batman was reading surfacing editorials in Chicago's newspapers that stated that a number of citizens believed Batman may be a Satanist. Alas/Batman suspected the Mad Hatter was behind these rumors somehow.

When he read the mysterious letter the man in the limo gave him, Batman was shocked: "Dear Batman, Please consider the eco-terrorism threats in the forest/woodsy areas around Chicago! You should consider pushing Chicago's leaders to creating a formal mental institution for the criminally insane. You could ask the environmentalism philanthropist Elizabeth Arkham. Maybe Tom Cruise can donate money for its construction.Your friend, Robin!"

Arkham Asylum

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Abishai100

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@cbishop: Well, there you go, sir, I took you up on that recommendation and wrote a continuation. What do you think?

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Abishai100

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Pollination/Pugilism

As we know from science, when bees travel flower-to-flower, they carry some of the pollen from each flower which gets stuck to their bodies and *inadvertently* spread pollen flower-to-flower and create 'natural mingling.'

This is my view of Batman and Robin. They work together, they fight together, but their approaches are very different, so their teamwork effectively and *inadvertently* creates a headache for nemeses such as the strange Condiment King (a villain who carries mustard-and-ketchup filled guns and wields them like an anti-capitalist terrorist) who seems to cynically believe that teamwork is flawed by capitalism.

So there you have it, now you know my 'philosophy of Batman,' which has definitely factored into this 2-part story (most likely my last entry in Fan-Fic).

Condiment King (Batman Wikia)

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cbishop

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@Abishai100: Well, it's a really strange turn to have Tom Cruise become Robin, and there doesn't seem to be a good reason for him to call himself Robin, but what the heck- he's Tom Cruise; everyone thinks he's a little crazy anyway. I was a little disappointed to see the Leatherface and Jason copycat idea appear here, as it's something you've used on several occasions now. Write the Jason and/or Leatherface copycat Halloween movie already. :)