You vs Manny Pacquiao

- Takes place in a boxing ring

- Both of you are on each end of it

- Standard elimination rules

- Manny has his boxing gloves. You have two wooden batons.

Scenario 1: Both of you are morals on

Scenario 2: Both of you are morals off

MAnny demolishes me

I throw the baton at him and try and shoot for a takedown while he is distracted by the wooden baton flying at his face. I think I can win 1/1000.

Manny stomps.

I die.

Manny is faster and hits harder than me. It's a wrap.

I hug him until the judges give me the win.

I hug him and dance around the ring for 12 rounds until the judges give me the win.

Pac-Man slaughters.

Yours truly, Frosty

It's a race to see if he can reach me before I manage to scream I give up. I think I would win.

I am stronger, larger, have enough training/experience with a variety of weapons to utilize the batons very well. He has no southpaw advantage against me since I fight with a similar southpaw style. He has some speed on me but his reach is much less than mine, especially with batons. I have a far larger breadth of fighting experience as well. This does not end well for him though I imagine I will be spending some time at the doctor as well.

I distract him with some adobo chicken and then crack his skull open.

I get stomped

I tear him apart and feast on his mauled carcass.

...What? I'm a bear.

@lord44:

My post was satire. While all of that is technically true about me, it's also true about a lot of other people. There are gonna be millions of people around the world that can win this scenario with a wooden baton. He's just too tiny. Yeah he's got fast hands and footwork, but that isn't going to overcome massive reach (especially when you add a baton), strength, and mass advantages that many people have.

None of this should be construed to mean Pacquiao isn't a badass fighter, only that skill is not as huge a difference as people like to think. Fighting an amatuer guy with a 5 inch reach and 66% mass advantage is something no real professional fighter risks except as a stunt. Fighting one with batons.... that's just stupid.

Lmao your post wins the internet.

Not gonna happen.

I don't even put a foot on that ring.

I hug him to death.

@leo-343: dang it, I was gonna say that XD

I'd just go for a takedown and beat him on the ground. Or I'd hit him in the knees with the batons first. He's a boxer, as long as you don't try to box him you can win.

People still salty.

This is the only way.

I stomp i him

Yeah bc boxing as we know it is dead and it's Mayweather's fault.

I'd kick his face, he was beat up by the old man recently.

@super_mod: how is boxing dead? Because Floyd is impossible to osnd good hits on? Because he has amazing defense?

@jayc1324: Oh here we go...

@super_mod: Well do you have anything to say to back up your ridiculous claim?

Or Pacquiao's fault for lying about a hampering shoulder injury, effectively cheating countless fans out of an opportunity to see a bout with both at full health...

Face it: the blame game doesn't work, man.

I throw one of my batons at his head, run for the ring, jump out and throw the other one behind me whenever I feel like he's getting close.

@jayc1324: .

He doesn't have to back up something that's been known in the fight industry for the last decade and to everyone else for the decade before that. Viewership is down. The number of fighters available has dwindled to less than a tenth of what it was. Fights are fewer and farther between. Good fights that people want to see are even fewer. There's a little tiny revival happening now, but it's not even a shadow of what boxing was if you lived in the Tyson years.

@namasthetu: And this is mayweather's fault how? He brings in people to boxing, he hasn't killed it.

I get stomped.

Manny

@jayc1324

My apologies, I thought you were only referring to boxing being dead. It is not Mayweather's fault, but he is often the target of such claims because he does tend to win by avoiding contact, which most people consider unsportsmanlike. This isn't his fault though as it is the various rules committees for allowing someone to basically avoid fighting in a fight for extended periods of time. Mayweather is merely the symptom of the issues boxing has with credibility. Being a loudmouthed punk also doesn't help though.

I mabey win 1 round, but only if I fight incredibly dirty. I'll have to aim for the baby makers.

Are people in this thread serious? Nobody here is taking on a pro boxer on his level

Not with batons or nutshots, nothing

Nobody wins unless you run away the entire match and hug him when he gets close. Then choose and buy the judges and location and referee. Then while hugging him you whisper to his ear and bully him. #Mayweather.

I get dropped like a sack of potatoes.

I win

Am Mayweather

@doctor_wheatley: I don't know anything about you and I have only seen your post from this thread but I'm following you bc of it.

Manny w/o morals? he win

Manny with morals? i beat the shit out of him killing him

Nah, I was just making a joke, G. I ain't got any problems with that match. I didn't even pay money for it, I watched it on a stream lmao

Only way to win it. I lose lol.

I lose.

lol meyweather won fair and square, though it was like he was somebody that stands there and blocks in Mortal kombat the whole match