Colonel Weird

Origin

Colonel Weird was a space soldier working for NASA. He was exploring the cosmos with his robot sidekick, Talky Walky . They find an ancient map painted on a cave on a primitive planet. Weird decides to follow it, finding a portal in the middle of space. Weird passed through it and found himself in the para-zone, which took a toll on his mind and body.

Creation

Col. Weird first appears in Black Hammer #1 by Jeff Lemire and Dean Ormston. He is an homage to Silver Age heroes, especially Adam Strange and Space Ranger.

Major Story Arcs

Welcome to Rockwood

When Spiral City was under attack by the Anti-God, Weird was recruited into the fight with Spiral’s other heroes by Starlok. When Black Hammer hit the Anti-God with his cosmic hammer, it caused a bright light. They found themselves teleported to Rockwood on a small farm for 10 years. The only other place Weird could go was the para-zone, where he spent most of his time. He was intended to be Rick, Abraham Slam’s son and Golden Gail’s father, but his time in the para-zone has caused him some mental instability. Thus, he is often not trusted to play his part.

They were settling into some kind of routine, but that was uprooted when Lucy Weber appeared. She was the daughter of their fellow superhero, Black Hammer, who died trying to leave the perimeter of Rockwood. She believed all the heroes had survived the event and wanted to find them. She couldn’t remember how she got here though.

Weird overheard Walky working with Lucy sometime later. She suggested using readings from her arrival to find a way to leave the perimeter. Weird wasn’t ready for his team to leave so he shot Walky. Soon after the team was brought back together by Weird to witness Lucy pick up her father’s hammer and become the new Black Hammer.

Age of Doom

Now that Lucy remembered everything she could explain the town of Rockwood to the others. They were all asleep in stasis pods on Col. Weird’s ship in the Para-Zone while their minds were kept in a magical illusion caused by the Cabin of Horror. This was due to a pact between Weird and Madame Dragonfly to save the universe. The killing of the Anti-God threw off the balance of light and dark. Weird and Dragonfly needed to take the heroes out in order to retain that balance. Lucy’s dad was killed when he tried leaving Weird’s ship and was exposed to the Para-Zone energies. With everyone awake, Weird took it upon himself to set auto-pilot to leave the Para-Zone.

As they pass through the Para-Zone gateway, Weird finds himself in the nowhere with a number of unrealized characters, rough drafts that were abandoned. Their world was being attacked by the Anti-God, and Weird rallied them together to find an escape route. They were able to leave the world of fiction and witness the creator. From there, they were able to point Weird home, where he finds his old friends re-assembling in a new fabricated reality that was about to be attacked by the Anti-God.

Unfortunately, Lucy receives a message from her father and Starlok. In order to defeat the Anti-God, the superheroes have to disappear again. Rather than kill them, Lucy convinces them to voluntarily re-enter the imaginary farm land, while she stays back as defender of Spiral City.

Cosmagog

After stepping through the portal opened by Madame Dragonfly, Weird did not find himself back on the farm. He became unstuck in time reliving parts of his life at different ages including his time as a bullied child, his romantic relationship with NASA space travel controller, Eve, and his involvement in counter culture during the the 60s. These versions of himself also experience deja vu, memory loss, and visions of their future. It was all revolving around a particular memory he hadn’t been able to remember.

Bouncing around, he suddenly realized what he had to do. He traveled back to the furthest time he could and drew the map that originally pointed him in the direction of the doorway to the Para-Zone. Still feeling empty, he finally remembered his old sidekick, Talky-Walky. It gave him great joy to remember that he was never truly alone and that Talky should exist in most of his memories. He went into the Para-Zone and found Talky abandoned. Now saved, the two of them continue on their space-faring quests.

Reborn

Talky and Weird have been trying to map the Para-Zone thanks to Talky’s new invention, Archive, an organic supercomputer. Archive finds an anomaly, so Weird goes for a space walk to investigate. He finds Doctor Andromeda and an evil variant fighting in the Para-Zone. The evil Doc introduced the Para-Verse to Weird, an even more complicated pattern than he already knew. It warped Weird’s mind further and set him in a time loop, while witnessing the Anti-God cataclysm in other universes. He also sees the Anti-God at the center of the para-verse, sleeping.

While on one of his loops, he reaches into one of the alternate realities that were being shown to him. He found himself in a void with nothing but a space station. He floated toward it and found the Parliament of Weird, an organization of Weird’s variants. They introduce him to more of the pattern he thinks he knows so well. With new information, he kills Lucy’s family hoping to inspire her back into the Black Hammer role.

Character Profile

• Height: 5'8"
• Weight: 150 lbs
• Eye Color: Brown
• Hair Color: White (originally blonde)
• Citizenship: American
• Marital Status: Single
• Occupation: Astronaut

Powers and Abilties

NASA Astronaut

Weird's training in NASA makes him a great hand-to-hand combatant and excellent pilot. He is outfitted with a space helmet, jet pack, and plasma ray gun.

Para-Zone

By tapping into the various energies from the para-zone, Weird is able to do a number of superhuman feats, the extent of which has not been explored. He has shown an ability to defy gravity, phase through solid objects, and teleport through time and space.